Becoming the Alpha by Ivy Sinclair Page B

backward. “I haven’t seen you in ten years. You don’t know me. I don’t know you. Why would you ask me to do this?”
    “Do you really want to know the answer?” His face tightened. “It seems like every time I think we’re going to have an honest conversation about this, you run away from me.”
    “Because it’s absurd.” Laughter bubbled in my throat. “I practically threw myself at you for the better part of my teenage years, and you never looked twice at me the way I wanted you to. It was always some other girl that had you all tied up in knots. Then one night you show up on my doorstep, and you were so sweet and so upset. When you kissed me, I thought I had finally broken through, and you understood what I wanted and wanted the same thing. And then you were gone. Now you show up, and I’m so confused about what it is exactly you want from me. Do you want the friend and confidant? You said you wanted somebody you could trust. Trusty old Maren to the rescue. But then last night you kissed me, and today you are looking at me like you want to devour me. But I don’t know who you are anymore, Lukas. You say you trust me, but I can’t trust you. I’m sorry, but I can’t.”
    My chest heaved as the words spilled out of me. They were the words I had been waiting ten years to say to him. I wanted to trust him, but he hadn’t proved that he was worthy. At least, not yet.
    “You can’t just expect me to give up my entire life and jump into this thing with you, especially not forever. I’m willing to help you. I told you that I would. I think for now, it’s better that we stick to the story that I’m helping you document the history of the clan. This mating thing - we need to forget about it.”
    “What if I don’t want to forget about it?” Lukas’s voice was definitely closer to a growl than anything else.
    “You have to,” I said. “You said that the female has to choose you back for the mating process to continue. I’m choosing not to do that. I can’t, and it is unfair of you to ask me to.”
    It killed me to see the expression of pain that crossed Lukas’s face for the briefest instant. I wondered if I was doing the right thing. For the better part of my life, I had wanted Lukas Kasper. Now, when it seemed as if I had the chance to have him, I was turning him down. Maybe there was something seriously wrong with me.
    I thought he was going to leave me then, but instead he crossed the room stalking me. I retreated, but he didn’t give me any time to think. My back pressed flat against the wall, and he took my lips in a hard crush as he pressed up against me. My body instantly burst into a hot molten need of desire that threatened to overwhelm me. He took hold of my hands and pressed them up over my head.
    I should have fought him. It was as if he hadn’t listened to a goddamn thing that I said. But the way his lips claimed mine told me how badly he wanted me. I opened my mouth willingly at his insistent probing, and his tongue danced against mine stroking it until I whimpered.
    Then he used one of his massive hands to keep both of mine snug against the wall above my head while his other hand drifted down my arm and the side of my ribcage. As it settled on my hip, he pulled me against him. I felt his hard need against my thigh.
    “Tell me you don’t want me,” he rasped against my lips. “Convince me you don’t want this too, Maren, and I’ll leave you alone. But I chose you, and I’m not going to let you go this time. Not unless you convince me you don’t want me too.”
    My mind was a jumble of incoherent thoughts, especially when his hand wandered down further and grazed my bare skin of my leg below the hem of my dress. His hand pushed upward underneath the skirt. All I could think was that I should stop him, but I didn’t want to. He was right. He was the one I wanted. He was the one that I always wanted. Now he said he wanted me. He was saying all of the things I wanted to hear