100 Ways to Improve Your Writing (Mentor Series) by Gary Provost Page A
Authors: Gary Provost
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voice, the car is given emphasis, and the story about what happened to it has a flow and rhythm lacking in the first example.
8. Say Things in a Positive Way ... Most of the Time
Usually what matters is what did happen, what does exist, and who is involved. So develop the habit of stating information in a positive manner.
If you want your reader to experience the silence of a church at night, write “The church was silent.” If you write “There was no noise in the church,” the first thing your reader will hear is the noise that isn’t there.
Look at the sentences below and see how much more effective each one is when written in a positive manner.
Of course, there are times when the negative statement should be used. If it’s ten o’clock on a stormy night and your wife was due home at six, you won’t call your brother and state the positive: “Jennifer is out.” You’ll emphasize the negative: “Jennifer is not home yet.”
In the sentences below, the negative sentence is stronger than the positive.
9. Be Specific
A specific word or phrase is usually better than a general one. The specific word etches a sharper picture and helps your reader to see what you are describing.
Picture a box.
Now picture a black box.
Now picture a black box with shiny silver hinges.
You can see the box more clearly as it becomes more specific.
Of course, there must be a limit to this. I could tell you about a small black box with shiny silver hinges on one end and an inlaid marble top which has a crimson heart painted on it with the most darling cupids dancing around the heart, and so forth. You would see the box, but you would be bored by it and by me.
Try to be specific without being wordy. Don’t make a sentence specific by hooking up a freight train of details to it. Make it specific by whittling all the possible word combinations down to those few that say what you want them to say.
10. Use Statistics
A few well-placed statistics will establish your credibility. If they are accurate and comprehensible, they will show the reader that you have done your homework and know what you are talking about. Keep in mind, however, that too many statistics will numb your reader’s ability to draw meaning from them. Statistics should be sprinkled like pepper, not smeared like butter.
In the following paragraph from Everything You Want to Know About Your Husband’s Money and Need to Know Before the Divorce (Crowell, 1980) authors Shelly Aspaklaria and Gerson Geltner use statistics effectively. They establish credibility. But also, by providing the reader with the number of divorces, percentages of women receiving alimony, and some average amounts of alimony, they gave their reader the necessary context in which to view other information in their book.
Divorce among couples married more than twenty years has risen annually from 51,000 in 1965 to 72,000 in 1976. These “displaced homemakers” are becoming the nation’s “new poor” studies by Congress show. Nationally only one out of seven divorced women (14 percent) receives alimony. Of the millions of divorced women, only 250,000 reported alimony income to the IRS in 1975. The average alimony in the United States in that year was $2,895. The highest average awards were made in Connecticut, about $9,728; Washington, D.C., $5,558; and Massachusetts at $4,122 annually. The lowest average alimony awards were granted in North Carolina, $954; Utah, $964; and Maryland, $1,194.
11. Provide Facts
In the following paragraph, the writer has drawn the right conclusions. His statements are factual. But because he is telling the reader his conclusions instead of providing the facts from which the reader can draw his own conclusions, the writing will not have impact.
A lot of banks hand out gifts when you open an account. Since you know that they want your account, it’s reasonable
8. Say Things in a Positive Way ... Most of the Time
Usually what matters is what did happen, what does exist, and who is involved. So develop the habit of stating information in a positive manner.
If you want your reader to experience the silence of a church at night, write “The church was silent.” If you write “There was no noise in the church,” the first thing your reader will hear is the noise that isn’t there.
Look at the sentences below and see how much more effective each one is when written in a positive manner.
Of course, there are times when the negative statement should be used. If it’s ten o’clock on a stormy night and your wife was due home at six, you won’t call your brother and state the positive: “Jennifer is out.” You’ll emphasize the negative: “Jennifer is not home yet.”
In the sentences below, the negative sentence is stronger than the positive.
9. Be Specific
A specific word or phrase is usually better than a general one. The specific word etches a sharper picture and helps your reader to see what you are describing.
Picture a box.
Now picture a black box.
Now picture a black box with shiny silver hinges.
You can see the box more clearly as it becomes more specific.
Of course, there must be a limit to this. I could tell you about a small black box with shiny silver hinges on one end and an inlaid marble top which has a crimson heart painted on it with the most darling cupids dancing around the heart, and so forth. You would see the box, but you would be bored by it and by me.
Try to be specific without being wordy. Don’t make a sentence specific by hooking up a freight train of details to it. Make it specific by whittling all the possible word combinations down to those few that say what you want them to say.
10. Use Statistics
A few well-placed statistics will establish your credibility. If they are accurate and comprehensible, they will show the reader that you have done your homework and know what you are talking about. Keep in mind, however, that too many statistics will numb your reader’s ability to draw meaning from them. Statistics should be sprinkled like pepper, not smeared like butter.
In the following paragraph from Everything You Want to Know About Your Husband’s Money and Need to Know Before the Divorce (Crowell, 1980) authors Shelly Aspaklaria and Gerson Geltner use statistics effectively. They establish credibility. But also, by providing the reader with the number of divorces, percentages of women receiving alimony, and some average amounts of alimony, they gave their reader the necessary context in which to view other information in their book.
Divorce among couples married more than twenty years has risen annually from 51,000 in 1965 to 72,000 in 1976. These “displaced homemakers” are becoming the nation’s “new poor” studies by Congress show. Nationally only one out of seven divorced women (14 percent) receives alimony. Of the millions of divorced women, only 250,000 reported alimony income to the IRS in 1975. The average alimony in the United States in that year was $2,895. The highest average awards were made in Connecticut, about $9,728; Washington, D.C., $5,558; and Massachusetts at $4,122 annually. The lowest average alimony awards were granted in North Carolina, $954; Utah, $964; and Maryland, $1,194.
11. Provide Facts
In the following paragraph, the writer has drawn the right conclusions. His statements are factual. But because he is telling the reader his conclusions instead of providing the facts from which the reader can draw his own conclusions, the writing will not have impact.
A lot of banks hand out gifts when you open an account. Since you know that they want your account, it’s reasonable
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