asked, âDid you check the room with the snake?â (There are five grades in this school, and Mrs. Shaughnesseyâs fifth grade, where the snake lives = the farthest room from Mrs. Duranâs room.)
The dog growled, âI smell that squirrel here.â
âAre you sure you donât smell me?â I asked. âThe squirrel and I are both rodents, and that makes us cousins. 1 squirrel + 1 hamster = 2 rodent cousins.â
The dog sniffed at my cage. âMaybe,â he said.
âWhereâs the room with the snake?â
âFifth grade,â I said. âAll the way down the hall.â
The dog left, his rope leash still trailing him. But just when Twitch started to come out from behindthe dictionary, the custodian came in. Twitch ducked down again.
âI thought I heard a dog,â the custodian said.
âHeâs gone to the fifth grade,â I said.
But even though animals can understand people, most people arenât very good at understanding animals.
The custodian looked around, scratched his head, and said, âMust be outside the building. Good. A dog in the school is the last thing I need with that art contest tomorrow.â
As soon as the custodian was gone, Twitch climbed back down the bookshelves. âThanks, cousin,â he said. âSee you tomorrow.â
He ran out of Mrs. Duranâs room but was back before I could climb into my exercise wheel.
âOh no!â he said. âThe human has left Schoolâand he shut the door behind him. That dog and I are both locked in here. What should I do?â
This was too much for me. I had thought of 1 plan, but I couldnât think of 2. âGo next door and ask the rabbit,â I said. âShe likes to order everyone around, but sheâs smart. Sheâll think of something.â
MISS LUCY COTTONTAIL
(second-grade rabbit)
Itâs not everybody that starts school in second grade.
The children in Ms. Waltersâs class went to first grade last year. They were in a different building in kindergarten the year before that. And most of them spent a year or two in nursery school.
Not me. I came to second grade straight from the pet shop, so that shows Iâm the smartest one here. Well maybe, except for Ms. Walters.
But Iâm not sure.
Ms. Walters never talks about being in first grade,so I think she may have skipped first grade, too. But she does talk about last yearâs second-grade class. Iâm smart enough to know that means Ms. Walters was kept back. But I am polite enough not to mention it.
I plan to finish second grade in one year. In fact, I think I may well skip third grade and go directly to fourth.
Another way I know Iâm the smartest one here is that Ms. Walters tells the children their job is to learn, but she says that my job is to be cute and cuddly and not bite. Obviously, I have already learned everything there is to learn.
Sometimes the children forget to latch my cage. I help them learn by running around the classroomand hiding under things. I leave a trail of little poops to help them find me.
Once, I made it all the way across the hall to Mr. Dalyâs third-grade room. Mr. Daly has fish. The fish are in a tank, and the tank is on a cart with wheels. I donât think the fish are very smart at all. They
never
escape and hide under things. They just swim back and forth, back and forth. I held my long, good-at-hearing-everything ears up against the glass to listen. But all theyâd say was âWe are in a school. We are in a school.â
âI know,â I said. âWe all are.â
Thereâs a squirrel who lives outside. Sometimes he comes to visit after Ms. Walters and all the children have gone home. The squirrel sits on the windowsill and makes faces and says rude things like: âIf you were really smart, the humans couldnât catch you. I donât let them catch me.â
I point out to him that
I
donât have
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