A Father In The Making by Carolyne Aarsen Page B

her hand, pressing her fingers against her lips, furrowing her brows, as if she, too, was trying to figure out how God would work everything for her good. One of the twins, “Dimples,” squawked and Mia immediately reached over and smoothed her hand over the little girl’s head, an unconscious gesture.
    Then, as if she sensed his attention, she looked over. He saw uncertainty in her expression and worry, and for a moment he wished he could ease all that away.
    You’re not that guy, he reminded himself. You don’t know how to take care of kids and she doesn’t want you around hers.
    With a start Nate realized Denny had finished reading. He looked down and folded his hands, aware of the next step, promising himself, and God, that this time he would pay attention.
    â€œDear Lord,” Denny prayed, “Thank You for this meal and that we could be here around this table safe and healthy. We continue to pray for Mia and her family. We ask that You will watch over them and restore them back to their home. Be with all of us who are searching for home. May we know that only in You, who works for our good, can we find our true home. Amen.”
    Nate kept his head bowed a moment longer, wondering if Denny was alluding to him with that last sentence. Nate knew he had drifted far from the faith introduced to him by his foster family. But he also knew the years he’d spent drifting around were an unspoken searching for a place he felt he could belong.
    But not yet, he told himself. Not yet. He had goals he wanted to meet. Things he wanted to do.
    Prove to your stepfather that you can actually amount to something?
    Nate dismissed the pernicious thought as he got up from the table. His stepfather was dead and he didn’t have to prove anything to anyone. He gathered up his and Denny’s plates, and brought them to the sink where Evangeline was already working.
    â€œWould you mind if I excuse myself?” Nate asked. “I want to check on my horses.”
    â€œThey okay?” Evangeline asked. “I thought you spent most of the day with them.”
    â€œYeah. But...” His excuse fizzled off as he looked over at Mia, who was watching him as if she was trying to figure him out. He held her gaze for a split second longer than he should have, feeling once again that faint quiver of attraction.
    He turned back to Evangeline, who gave him an arch smile. “Of course. You go check on your horses. And you’ll have to join us again for supper tomorrow.”
    Nate doubted he would. Hamburgers and pizza in Hartley Creek was probably on the menu until he could leave. And the sooner that happened, the better.
    He slipped his cowboy boots on and stepped outside into the cool evening air. The sun was setting behind the mountains, pulling the warmth of the day with it. He took a long, deep breath, as if easing out the restlessness he could never completely shake and walked over to the barn. He just wanted to be around less complicated mammals. His horses didn’t need anything.
    He grabbed the book he’d been reading, the book club book that Evangeline had given him, settled onto a bale and made an attempt at reading. But he caught his eyes drifting off the page as his mind slipped back to Mia. Nico.
    His own situation.
    Though he understood why Mia didn’t want him around Nico, it still created an edge of stress. He liked the little guy and felt sorry for him. He would have liked to help him, though he wasn’t sure how.
    Tango nickered, and Nate got up to see if he was okay.
    His horse stood in the corner of the stall, his head down, obviously in pain. Nate stepped into the stall and walked toward his horse.
    â€œHey, guy. I’m sorry. If I’d paid attention I might have seen that camper before he cut us off,” he said quietly and gently running his hands over Tango’s leg, checking the injury. “I know you count on me and I let you down. But I’ll help