that’s what they mean. They practically accused you right out! Goddamn those idiots; they’ve got their head up their behinds.”
“Steve, I don’t think they’re saying anyone gave something to Mindy. How could they be saying that? Who would do that?” said Priscilla.
“That’s just what I was trying to get at in there. If someone did it, we gotta think who it might be. Because we know it wasn’t you and we know it wasn’t me. So maybe it was someone I sent up to C.Y.A. sometime, or someone you refused benefits to. I’ve gotta get a list of Kaiser employees out of those suckers, see if maybe there’s someone on there I recognize. You know how these kids are always threatening to do me in or come after my family. Well, maybe one of them did.”
“Oh, Steve!” She spoke through her hands.
“Well, you got a better idea?” He pulled the camper off Woodbine Drive in a vicious left turn into their driveway.
“No, but I still think you’re wrong.” She was crying again. “I wonder how Mindy is doing.”
“You want me to cancel the fishing?”
“No, no. The boys are counting on it. You’d better go pick them up.” She pushed herself off the high step of the van, landing heavily, and started for the front door.
“Okay. See you later.”
She didn’t answer. He watched her sturdy duck-footed walk as she passed under the bottle brush that sheltered the walk. She usually walked everywhere fast and head high, but she suddenly looked old and worn out.
Steve backed the camper out of the drive and headed for the neighbor where he had hastily dumped the boys after Pris had called him. Then he’d stop over at Skip’s and go out for some fishing along Point San Pedro Road. He wasn’t ready to tell Skip about it because he needed to pull his thoughts together.
He had no doubt the doctors were saying that someone had put something into Mindy, and that pretty damn soon they were going to be saying it was Priscilla. He was sure they were laying the railroad tracks right to her door. So he was going to have to work and head them off because he knew damn well that Pris hadn’t given anything to Mindy. They were probably trying to hide something, he thought. But Kaiser was a pretty damn big operation to be taking on as an adversary. There was just one vague glimmer of hope, and Steve clung to it now. Maybe when Sara came back, she’d straighten it all out. Maybe it was just one giant mistake.
15
Priscilla stood in the shower for a long time. She had lurched into the bathroom in time to throw up into the toilet. But now she couldn’t stop crying. She had been crying all afternoon in her bed, immobilized.
Lifting her swollen face to the jets of water, she let it all pour down her. A river of tears, she thought. They could not do this to her. They could not. The hot orange rug reflected back at her, mocking her with its cheerfulness. The water turned cold finally, and she shut it off.
She dressed in her room, choosing at random a dark corduroy dress to go over slip, nylons, and fresh underwear. She pulled a comb through her wet hair and fluffed at it with her fingers, wondering vaguely if she should set it. In the mirror her face was a ruin, her eyes red and sunken in their puffy lids. Her eyes seemed to weigh her whole face down.
She had decided to see Carte again to find out what he meant. She could not live like this, not knowing, shut out.
She couldn’t see Mindy again till four o’clock, when they would allow her five minutes, like some prisoner in jail. So at four, she was at the door to the ICU, ringing the bell to be admitted.
She couldn’t believe what she saw. The naso-gastric tube was gone. There was no IV. Priscilla looked over at the nurse who had come on shift while Priscilla had been at home. It was ridiculous, she thought. It was Lesley McCarcy, the same nurse who had been on Pediatrics with her the night before.
“So much for the change of staff Carte mentioned,” she
“Steve, I don’t think they’re saying anyone gave something to Mindy. How could they be saying that? Who would do that?” said Priscilla.
“That’s just what I was trying to get at in there. If someone did it, we gotta think who it might be. Because we know it wasn’t you and we know it wasn’t me. So maybe it was someone I sent up to C.Y.A. sometime, or someone you refused benefits to. I’ve gotta get a list of Kaiser employees out of those suckers, see if maybe there’s someone on there I recognize. You know how these kids are always threatening to do me in or come after my family. Well, maybe one of them did.”
“Oh, Steve!” She spoke through her hands.
“Well, you got a better idea?” He pulled the camper off Woodbine Drive in a vicious left turn into their driveway.
“No, but I still think you’re wrong.” She was crying again. “I wonder how Mindy is doing.”
“You want me to cancel the fishing?”
“No, no. The boys are counting on it. You’d better go pick them up.” She pushed herself off the high step of the van, landing heavily, and started for the front door.
“Okay. See you later.”
She didn’t answer. He watched her sturdy duck-footed walk as she passed under the bottle brush that sheltered the walk. She usually walked everywhere fast and head high, but she suddenly looked old and worn out.
Steve backed the camper out of the drive and headed for the neighbor where he had hastily dumped the boys after Pris had called him. Then he’d stop over at Skip’s and go out for some fishing along Point San Pedro Road. He wasn’t ready to tell Skip about it because he needed to pull his thoughts together.
He had no doubt the doctors were saying that someone had put something into Mindy, and that pretty damn soon they were going to be saying it was Priscilla. He was sure they were laying the railroad tracks right to her door. So he was going to have to work and head them off because he knew damn well that Pris hadn’t given anything to Mindy. They were probably trying to hide something, he thought. But Kaiser was a pretty damn big operation to be taking on as an adversary. There was just one vague glimmer of hope, and Steve clung to it now. Maybe when Sara came back, she’d straighten it all out. Maybe it was just one giant mistake.
15
Priscilla stood in the shower for a long time. She had lurched into the bathroom in time to throw up into the toilet. But now she couldn’t stop crying. She had been crying all afternoon in her bed, immobilized.
Lifting her swollen face to the jets of water, she let it all pour down her. A river of tears, she thought. They could not do this to her. They could not. The hot orange rug reflected back at her, mocking her with its cheerfulness. The water turned cold finally, and she shut it off.
She dressed in her room, choosing at random a dark corduroy dress to go over slip, nylons, and fresh underwear. She pulled a comb through her wet hair and fluffed at it with her fingers, wondering vaguely if she should set it. In the mirror her face was a ruin, her eyes red and sunken in their puffy lids. Her eyes seemed to weigh her whole face down.
She had decided to see Carte again to find out what he meant. She could not live like this, not knowing, shut out.
She couldn’t see Mindy again till four o’clock, when they would allow her five minutes, like some prisoner in jail. So at four, she was at the door to the ICU, ringing the bell to be admitted.
She couldn’t believe what she saw. The naso-gastric tube was gone. There was no IV. Priscilla looked over at the nurse who had come on shift while Priscilla had been at home. It was ridiculous, she thought. It was Lesley McCarcy, the same nurse who had been on Pediatrics with her the night before.
“So much for the change of staff Carte mentioned,” she
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