me know how it all works out, we’ll treat it as a teaching experience.”
I could see how curious he was to hear the whole story. “Well—that’s very generous.”
He helped Jane out of the chair as if she were a frail old lady, then watched as she buttoned her coat.
As soon as we had closed the outside door, I grabbed her shoulders. I could barely keep from shrieking. “You didn’t see her drown! Someone told you to tell me that.”
“Really? Really? I was afraid when you yelled, ‘That’s enough.’ it was because you didn’t want me to go through it again.”
“You heard that? No, I guess I didn’t want us to live through all that agony again, if it wasn’t really true.” Yet now I felt sorry that I hadn’t let it unspool. We might have learned other things, like what had happened to the woman with the stroller. “But you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Just excited.”
“Me too.” Part of me wanted to dance and whirl and scream my happiness to the stars. What stopped me was that there had still been an eyewitness to the drowning,
I unlocked the van and we climbed in. But rather than stay in the small industrial parking lot, I drove to my favorite pond just a few blocks away. There were no other cars this time of night. In summer I would come here to watch the red-winged blackbirds swoop in and out of the trees, chasing each other. But they were gone now, the trees as bare as ancestral bones.
As soon as I pulled into a parking space, I slid the disk into the player. Jane was pressed into the seat, her knuckles against her mouth. I kept the engine running, the lights on.
“Don’t let it hypnotize you again,” I warned.
She laughed.
As soon as we heard Dr. Lundy’s soothing tones and I looked out over the pond, I realized what I had done. I had brought us to a place of more dark water.
As the CD ended, Jane said, “Is that how I sounded when I was little? Play that part again.”
How could she focus on her voice when what she was saying might have changed our lives completely? Obediently I ejected the CD, then pushed it in again.
This time she stopped the recording before Dr. Lundy could bring her out of her trance, and turned to me. “That woman should rot in hell! How could she steal Cate? How could she walk out of the park with her? She must have put Cate in that stroller as soon as I wasn’t looking.”
“You think she had Caitlin in the stroller?” Belatedly I started to fit it together.
“Of course she did. That’s why she wouldn’t let me reach in and get the rabbit, why she sent me running to you with a message so she could get away.”
“But she said she saw Caitlin fall in.”
Jane put her hand on my arm. “Mom, think. If that woman had been legitimate she wouldn’t have stood there calmly and watched a little girl drown. She would have rushed over to pull Cate out herself, or at least raised the alarm. Besides, there wasn’t enough time. We were far from the water and it only took me a minute to pick the flower and run back. I wanted that bunny, remember? There was only enough time for the woman to pop her in the carriage and—I don’t know—chloroform her?”
I couldn’t speak. The thought of my high-spirited little girl being roughly grabbed, shoved down and knocked out, shocked me as nothing else had. What had been done to her after that? I saw her being wheeled out of the park, past the historical buildings of Stratford, and then—
But Jane was still trying to prove her point. “I said she was dressed like a nurse, but she could have been a nanny. Dressed like one. Why else would she bring an empty stroller to the park with toys in it if she hadn’t been planning something like this?”
“Had you seen her before?”
“When I saw her tonight, I recognized her. So yes, I guess so.”
“But where was I? I couldn’t have been that oblivious.” I had been a worse mother than I thought.
“She didn’t let you see her. She’d planned it all out,
I could see how curious he was to hear the whole story. “Well—that’s very generous.”
He helped Jane out of the chair as if she were a frail old lady, then watched as she buttoned her coat.
As soon as we had closed the outside door, I grabbed her shoulders. I could barely keep from shrieking. “You didn’t see her drown! Someone told you to tell me that.”
“Really? Really? I was afraid when you yelled, ‘That’s enough.’ it was because you didn’t want me to go through it again.”
“You heard that? No, I guess I didn’t want us to live through all that agony again, if it wasn’t really true.” Yet now I felt sorry that I hadn’t let it unspool. We might have learned other things, like what had happened to the woman with the stroller. “But you’re okay?”
“I’m fine. Just excited.”
“Me too.” Part of me wanted to dance and whirl and scream my happiness to the stars. What stopped me was that there had still been an eyewitness to the drowning,
I unlocked the van and we climbed in. But rather than stay in the small industrial parking lot, I drove to my favorite pond just a few blocks away. There were no other cars this time of night. In summer I would come here to watch the red-winged blackbirds swoop in and out of the trees, chasing each other. But they were gone now, the trees as bare as ancestral bones.
As soon as I pulled into a parking space, I slid the disk into the player. Jane was pressed into the seat, her knuckles against her mouth. I kept the engine running, the lights on.
“Don’t let it hypnotize you again,” I warned.
She laughed.
As soon as we heard Dr. Lundy’s soothing tones and I looked out over the pond, I realized what I had done. I had brought us to a place of more dark water.
As the CD ended, Jane said, “Is that how I sounded when I was little? Play that part again.”
How could she focus on her voice when what she was saying might have changed our lives completely? Obediently I ejected the CD, then pushed it in again.
This time she stopped the recording before Dr. Lundy could bring her out of her trance, and turned to me. “That woman should rot in hell! How could she steal Cate? How could she walk out of the park with her? She must have put Cate in that stroller as soon as I wasn’t looking.”
“You think she had Caitlin in the stroller?” Belatedly I started to fit it together.
“Of course she did. That’s why she wouldn’t let me reach in and get the rabbit, why she sent me running to you with a message so she could get away.”
“But she said she saw Caitlin fall in.”
Jane put her hand on my arm. “Mom, think. If that woman had been legitimate she wouldn’t have stood there calmly and watched a little girl drown. She would have rushed over to pull Cate out herself, or at least raised the alarm. Besides, there wasn’t enough time. We were far from the water and it only took me a minute to pick the flower and run back. I wanted that bunny, remember? There was only enough time for the woman to pop her in the carriage and—I don’t know—chloroform her?”
I couldn’t speak. The thought of my high-spirited little girl being roughly grabbed, shoved down and knocked out, shocked me as nothing else had. What had been done to her after that? I saw her being wheeled out of the park, past the historical buildings of Stratford, and then—
But Jane was still trying to prove her point. “I said she was dressed like a nurse, but she could have been a nanny. Dressed like one. Why else would she bring an empty stroller to the park with toys in it if she hadn’t been planning something like this?”
“Had you seen her before?”
“When I saw her tonight, I recognized her. So yes, I guess so.”
“But where was I? I couldn’t have been that oblivious.” I had been a worse mother than I thought.
“She didn’t let you see her. She’d planned it all out,
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