beside the head of her bed. “I want everything, T. I want to be with you, just the two of us. No one else to complicate our relationship. I want another chance to prove you can fall in love with me and me alone.”
Tina shook her head. “Stop!” She threw out a hand to punctuate her plea and turned to him with tear-filled eyes. “Please, stop. It’s been too long, Gabe. Too much has happened. I… I’m too angry with you to go down this road.” She took a deep, rasping breath. “You l-left me. You left us. When I was with you and Connor I was so happy. You became my life, my rocks. And y-yes, I loved you then, but it’s not quite as simple as that.” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “I loved you b-both. Together.” She wrinkled her nose in concentration. “I can’t separate you from Connor, and I can’t separate my feelings for you from my feelings for Connor. When I think of you I think of Connor, and when I think of Connor I think of you.”
She drummed the palm of her hand against her forehead in frustration. “You destroyed that. When you walked out on Connor and me you destroyed our threesome. You broke up my life and you tore out my heart. Connor and I couldn’t go on without you. We weren’t whole anymore.”
Her words ripped through his chest. Christ, she couldn’t distinguish him from Connor. Couldn’t separate them out in her mind. He hadn’t stood out enough as an individual. He was simply one half of a whole.
He wasn’t man enough for the one woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
Gabe rose to his feet, the weight of his realization sitting like lead on his shoulders. “I’m sorry I hurt you,” he said. “And I’m sorry I broke up your life. It was never my intention to cause you pain. Please. Give me a chance to make it right. Let me prove that I can love you enough for Connor and me. Love you enough that you’ll forgive my leaving you before.”
Tina shook her head. “I can’t do it, Gabe. I can’t pretend I’d be okay with just you. If—and that’s a big ‘if’—I ever did consider becoming involved with you again, I’d want the whole package deal. I’d want you and Connor.” Tears stood out in her eyes. “But it’s been too long anyway. Too much time has passed for me to ever go back.”
Gabe buttoned his jeans and straightened his shirt, the pain of her admission strangling him, cutting off his air. He took a deep, ragged breath. Tried to put his thoughts in order. Tried to maintain a modicum of composure. Not easy when he felt like he’d just been kicked in the nuts.
He gave her a small nod. “I hear you, T. And I guess I owe you yet another apology. I…it was wrong of me to seek you out after all this time. Forget about today. Forget about me and everything I told you.” He took another ragged breath. “I hope I haven’t upset you. I…I won’t bother you anymore.” He walked towards the door, his legs stiff and awkward. “Good luck with the exhibition. I’m sure with Valerie’s help your sketches will finally get the recognition they deserve.”
“You’re leaving?” She gaped at him.
Gabe nodded.
“After everything you just said to me? Everything you just did to me?” She kicked the covers, and the vibrator rolled off the bed and landed on the floor with a soft thud.
Gabe stared at it for a long moment. “I had to try. I had to let you know how I felt, on the off chance that maybe you felt the same.” He shrugged indifferently while inside his stomach cramped. “It would have been good if we could have tried again, just the two of us. But I’m not what you want anymore. I’m just…a man. Just one man. And that’s all I’ll ever be.”
And then he couldn’t be with her any longer. Couldn’t face his failure to please her as that one man. He’d disappointed her when he’d left her the first time, and he hadn’t measured up this time round. It would be better for both of them if he just left her the hell
Tina shook her head. “Stop!” She threw out a hand to punctuate her plea and turned to him with tear-filled eyes. “Please, stop. It’s been too long, Gabe. Too much has happened. I… I’m too angry with you to go down this road.” She took a deep, rasping breath. “You l-left me. You left us. When I was with you and Connor I was so happy. You became my life, my rocks. And y-yes, I loved you then, but it’s not quite as simple as that.” She took a deep, shuddering breath. “I loved you b-both. Together.” She wrinkled her nose in concentration. “I can’t separate you from Connor, and I can’t separate my feelings for you from my feelings for Connor. When I think of you I think of Connor, and when I think of Connor I think of you.”
She drummed the palm of her hand against her forehead in frustration. “You destroyed that. When you walked out on Connor and me you destroyed our threesome. You broke up my life and you tore out my heart. Connor and I couldn’t go on without you. We weren’t whole anymore.”
Her words ripped through his chest. Christ, she couldn’t distinguish him from Connor. Couldn’t separate them out in her mind. He hadn’t stood out enough as an individual. He was simply one half of a whole.
He wasn’t man enough for the one woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
Gabe rose to his feet, the weight of his realization sitting like lead on his shoulders. “I’m sorry I hurt you,” he said. “And I’m sorry I broke up your life. It was never my intention to cause you pain. Please. Give me a chance to make it right. Let me prove that I can love you enough for Connor and me. Love you enough that you’ll forgive my leaving you before.”
Tina shook her head. “I can’t do it, Gabe. I can’t pretend I’d be okay with just you. If—and that’s a big ‘if’—I ever did consider becoming involved with you again, I’d want the whole package deal. I’d want you and Connor.” Tears stood out in her eyes. “But it’s been too long anyway. Too much time has passed for me to ever go back.”
Gabe buttoned his jeans and straightened his shirt, the pain of her admission strangling him, cutting off his air. He took a deep, ragged breath. Tried to put his thoughts in order. Tried to maintain a modicum of composure. Not easy when he felt like he’d just been kicked in the nuts.
He gave her a small nod. “I hear you, T. And I guess I owe you yet another apology. I…it was wrong of me to seek you out after all this time. Forget about today. Forget about me and everything I told you.” He took another ragged breath. “I hope I haven’t upset you. I…I won’t bother you anymore.” He walked towards the door, his legs stiff and awkward. “Good luck with the exhibition. I’m sure with Valerie’s help your sketches will finally get the recognition they deserve.”
“You’re leaving?” She gaped at him.
Gabe nodded.
“After everything you just said to me? Everything you just did to me?” She kicked the covers, and the vibrator rolled off the bed and landed on the floor with a soft thud.
Gabe stared at it for a long moment. “I had to try. I had to let you know how I felt, on the off chance that maybe you felt the same.” He shrugged indifferently while inside his stomach cramped. “It would have been good if we could have tried again, just the two of us. But I’m not what you want anymore. I’m just…a man. Just one man. And that’s all I’ll ever be.”
And then he couldn’t be with her any longer. Couldn’t face his failure to please her as that one man. He’d disappointed her when he’d left her the first time, and he hadn’t measured up this time round. It would be better for both of them if he just left her the hell
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