A Thursday Next Digital Collection: Novels 1-5 by Jasper Fforde Page A

slowly down the steps.”
    â€œSo you hit her?”
    â€œDefinitely.”
    Flanker dug a small evidence bag out of his pocket and showed it to me. It contained three of my slugs, flattened as though they had been fired into the side of a tank.
    When Flanker spoke again his voice was edged with disbelief.
    â€œYou say that Acheron disguised himself as an old lady?”
    â€œYes, sir,” I replied, looking straight ahead.
    â€œHow did he do that?”
    â€œI don’t know, sir.”
    â€œHow could a man over six foot six dress in a small woman’s clothes?”
    â€œI don’t think he did it physically; I think he just projected what he wanted me to see.”
    â€œThat sounds crazy.”
    â€œThere’s a lot we don’t know about Hades.”
    â€œ That I can agree with. The old lady’s name was Mrs. Grimswold; we found her wedged up the chimney in Styx’s apartment. It took three men to pull her out.”
    Flanker thought for a moment and let one of the other men ask a question.
    â€œI’m interested to know why you were both armed with expanding ammunition,” said one of the other officers, not looking at me but at the wall. He was short and dark and had anannoying twitch in his left eye. “Fluted hollow points and high-power loads. What were you planning to shoot? Buffalo?”
    I took a deep breath.
    â€œHades was shot six times without any ill effects in ’77, sir. Tamworth gave us expanded ammunition to use against him. He said he had SO-1 approval.”
    â€œWell, he didn’t. If the papers get hold of this there will be hell to pay. SpecOps doesn’t have a good relationship with the press, Miss Next. The Mole keeps on wanting access for one of its journalists. In this climate of accountability the politicians are leaning on us more and more. Expanding ammunition!— Shit, not even the Special Cavalry use those on Russians.”
    â€œThat’s what I said,” I countered, “but having seen the state of these”—I shook the bag of flattened slugs—“I can see that Tamworth showed considerable restraint. We should have been carrying armor-piercing.”
    â€œDon’t even think about it.”
    We had a break then. Flanker and the others vanished into the next room to argue while a nurse changed the dressing on my arm. I had been lucky; there had been no infection. I was thinking about Snood when they returned to resume the interview.
    â€œAs I walked carefully down the stairwell it was apparent that Acheron was now unarmed,” I continued. “A nine-millimeter Beretta lay on the concrete steps next to a tin of custard powder. Of Acheron and the little old lady, there was no sign. On the landing I found a door to an apartment that had been pushed open with great force, shearing both hinge pins and the Chubb door bolt. I quickly questioned the occupants of the apartment but they were both insensible with laughter; it seemed Acheron had told them some sort of a joke about three anteaters in a pub, and I got no sense out of either of them.”
    One of the operatives was slowly shaking her head.
    â€œWhat is it now?” I asked indignantly.
    â€œNeither of the two people you describe remember you or Hades coming through their apartment. All they recall is the door bursting open for no apparent reason. How do you account for this?”
    I thought for a moment.
    â€œObviously, I can’t. Perhaps he has control over the weak-minded. We still only have a small idea of this man’s powers.”
    â€œHmm,” replied the operative thoughtfully. “To tell the truth, the couple did try to tell us the joke about the anteaters. We wondered about that.”
    â€œIt wasn’t funny, was it?”
    â€œNot at all. But they seemed to think it was.”
    I was beginning to feel angry and didn’t like the way the interview was going. I collected my thoughts and continued,