head. “I mean, didn’t you hear them? They want a marriage like ours, John. They’re getting married on our anniversary, for goodness sake. You think we can go out there now and tell them we’re getting a divorce?”
John clenched his teeth and stared at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck with his right hand.
Stand up and look me in the eye! Abby folded her arms and glared at him. He was always rubbing his neck about one thing or another. It was too late for that now.
“Can’t you say something?”
John brought his head up slowly, and Abby was not prepared for the transparency of his eyes or the sadness she saw there. “I’m so sorry, Abby. I feel . . . I don’t know, I guess I feel like I failed you, failed God. Failed everyone.”
She had expected him to snap back at her, but this . . . this broken man before her was someone she hadn’t seen in nearly a decade.
Don’t forget about Charlene.
The taunting voice flung darts at her compassion, bursting it like a cheap balloon. Good point. We’re too far gone to feel sorry for each other. Not with—
Don’t say it, daughter. The tongue is full of evil.
“Save your confessions for Charlene.”
As soon as the words were out she wished she could snatch them from the air and shove them back inside, where she could sort through and filter them. She remembered something her father had told her once after he’d given his life to the Lord. Trying to take back unkind words is like trying to put the toothpaste back in the tube. You can’t do it, and you’ll only make a mess of things trying.
Abby uncrossed her arms and tapped her fingers softly on the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t very nice.”
John cocked his head and studied her. “No, it wasn’t, but then we haven’t exactly been very nice to each other for a while now.”
Abby felt fresh tears in her eyes as she turned to fill the kettle and light the fire beneath it. “So what’re we supposed to do?”
“We pull it together, go back in there, and act excited for our daughter, that’s what.” John’s voice was quiet and measured, the way it sounded when there was no arguing with him.
“What about our announcement?” Panic rose in Abby’s chest; she desperately needed fresh air. They couldn’t pretend another six months, could they? In the shadows of planning a wedding for Nicole and Matt? Help me, God, I—
She caught herself. What point was there in asking the Lord for help when He wasn’t handing out answers anyway? At least not any she could use.
“We can tell the kids after the wedding. Really, Abby.” John worked his face into an incredulous frown. “You think we can go back in there, ask Matt to leave, and then tell them we’re finished? Nicole would probably pack her bags and elope. She deserves more than that from us.”
“Well, that’s why I don’t have a grip here, all right?” Pain and sarcasm oozed from every word, and Abby fought to keep from spitting at him. “You’re dating another woman right under my nose, and now I get to pretend everything’s fine for another six months.” He rolled his eyes and she continued, her anger building with each whispered word. “Not only that, but I have to act like our marriage is this shining beacon of an example for our daughter and her fiancé while we shop for wedding dresses and flower arrangements. It’s enough to put me over the edge, John.”
“For crying out loud, Abby, I’m not dating her!” It was the loudest John had gotten during the discussion, and Abby glanced toward the kitchen entrance then back at him.
“Keep it down. Please. And quit lying.” If the kids came in now, she had no idea what they’d say to explain why they were fighting in the kitchen.
John continued as if he hadn’t heard her. “Okay, you want to know the truth? I kissed her. There, are you happy?”
Her world shifted wildly as she stared at him. He was finally admitting it; she had been right after all. John
John clenched his teeth and stared at the ground, rubbing the back of his neck with his right hand.
Stand up and look me in the eye! Abby folded her arms and glared at him. He was always rubbing his neck about one thing or another. It was too late for that now.
“Can’t you say something?”
John brought his head up slowly, and Abby was not prepared for the transparency of his eyes or the sadness she saw there. “I’m so sorry, Abby. I feel . . . I don’t know, I guess I feel like I failed you, failed God. Failed everyone.”
She had expected him to snap back at her, but this . . . this broken man before her was someone she hadn’t seen in nearly a decade.
Don’t forget about Charlene.
The taunting voice flung darts at her compassion, bursting it like a cheap balloon. Good point. We’re too far gone to feel sorry for each other. Not with—
Don’t say it, daughter. The tongue is full of evil.
“Save your confessions for Charlene.”
As soon as the words were out she wished she could snatch them from the air and shove them back inside, where she could sort through and filter them. She remembered something her father had told her once after he’d given his life to the Lord. Trying to take back unkind words is like trying to put the toothpaste back in the tube. You can’t do it, and you’ll only make a mess of things trying.
Abby uncrossed her arms and tapped her fingers softly on the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t very nice.”
John cocked his head and studied her. “No, it wasn’t, but then we haven’t exactly been very nice to each other for a while now.”
Abby felt fresh tears in her eyes as she turned to fill the kettle and light the fire beneath it. “So what’re we supposed to do?”
“We pull it together, go back in there, and act excited for our daughter, that’s what.” John’s voice was quiet and measured, the way it sounded when there was no arguing with him.
“What about our announcement?” Panic rose in Abby’s chest; she desperately needed fresh air. They couldn’t pretend another six months, could they? In the shadows of planning a wedding for Nicole and Matt? Help me, God, I—
She caught herself. What point was there in asking the Lord for help when He wasn’t handing out answers anyway? At least not any she could use.
“We can tell the kids after the wedding. Really, Abby.” John worked his face into an incredulous frown. “You think we can go back in there, ask Matt to leave, and then tell them we’re finished? Nicole would probably pack her bags and elope. She deserves more than that from us.”
“Well, that’s why I don’t have a grip here, all right?” Pain and sarcasm oozed from every word, and Abby fought to keep from spitting at him. “You’re dating another woman right under my nose, and now I get to pretend everything’s fine for another six months.” He rolled his eyes and she continued, her anger building with each whispered word. “Not only that, but I have to act like our marriage is this shining beacon of an example for our daughter and her fiancé while we shop for wedding dresses and flower arrangements. It’s enough to put me over the edge, John.”
“For crying out loud, Abby, I’m not dating her!” It was the loudest John had gotten during the discussion, and Abby glanced toward the kitchen entrance then back at him.
“Keep it down. Please. And quit lying.” If the kids came in now, she had no idea what they’d say to explain why they were fighting in the kitchen.
John continued as if he hadn’t heard her. “Okay, you want to know the truth? I kissed her. There, are you happy?”
Her world shifted wildly as she stared at him. He was finally admitting it; she had been right after all. John
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