shook his head and retrieved a briefcase from the floor. He set it on a chair and pushed the buttons, turning it so she could see what the case contained. Harsh light reflected off what seemed like a hundred exotic tools, all shiny metal and very sharp. He presented them proudly, first to the cameras, then to her.
“It’s nothing personal, you know. This’ll be easy. All you have to do is act and react naturally. Piece of cake. Dan was willing to pay one million for an angel lust video.” He picked up a wicked looking meat fork with curved tines, tilting his head as he examined her body, looking for the appropriate place to begin. His smile was gentle but his eyes remained hard as he placed the pointed prongs against Liza’s trembling abdomen. The muscles in his forearm bunched as he applied enough pressure to puncture flesh, earning an agonized wail in return. “But he will pay me five million for a snuff film.”
RETIREMENT WOES
William had never been a cruel person before the squirrel moved onto his roof.
Two weeks into summer vacation, fourteen long days after he had bid his students farewell for the last time, William sat at the kitchen table in his boxers and white t-shirt under a tattered blue robe. A bowl of oatmeal sat untouched on the table next to the unread newspaper spread out before him.
Staring at the clock on the wall, he watched the minutes tick past and wondered what he was supposed to do with the rest of his life.
“William, will you please mow that lawn today?” His wife, Kristi, walked through the kitchen and into the dining room, a cloud of soft, floral perfume left floating in her wake. Smartly dressed in a peach blazer and skirt with her gray hair perfectly coiffed atop her head in a twist, she was ready for her day as a personal banker, the job she’d held since their kids had all started school.
“Hmmph.” William grunted, glancing at his wife, then returning his eyes to the clock.
“Oh William, really. Are you going to mope around here forever? How are you going to handle retirement if you can’t even find something to do for the summer? You’re used to having summers off.” Kristi pulled out a chair and perched lightly on the edge, grabbing his hand in her own and frowning. “Have you been taking those pills the doctor gave you?”
“I’m not depressed.” William also frowned, but it felt diluted in comparison to his wife’s stern countenance. Everything about her personality had always been more forceful, more vibrant. He had no delusions about who ran their household. “I’m just bored.”
“You know what you need, William?” Kristi’s favorite pastime had always been telling William what he needed. “You need a hobby. Rachel’s husband builds model cars and Ralph across the street does all that woodworking.”
“Those are old man hobbies.”
“We aren’t getting any younger, dear.” She patted his hand affectionately, but he pulled his own back.
“I’m not that old.” The whiny tone in his voice made him feel like a petulant child.
“Really, William? So what is this? Sitting around in your shorts all day feeling sorry for yourself? I swear, the least you can do is go out and get rid of that damned squirrel.”
“Squirrel?”
“Yeah. The squirrel that’s on the roof making Devon bark. Can’t you hear him? Or are you going deaf too?” Kristi stood and retrieved her purse, her back stiff and her chin raised in anger. With her hand on the doorknob she turned slightly, her eyes narrowed as she spoke. “You need to do something with yourself, William. I will not spend the next thirty years watching you give up and rot in that chair.”
William watched the door slam behind her. Standing to take a shower, he paused when he heard Devon begin to bay in the backyard.
He does sound upset about something, he thought, opting to forego the shower and just get dressed so he could investigate.
On his way to the door, William tripped over
“It’s nothing personal, you know. This’ll be easy. All you have to do is act and react naturally. Piece of cake. Dan was willing to pay one million for an angel lust video.” He picked up a wicked looking meat fork with curved tines, tilting his head as he examined her body, looking for the appropriate place to begin. His smile was gentle but his eyes remained hard as he placed the pointed prongs against Liza’s trembling abdomen. The muscles in his forearm bunched as he applied enough pressure to puncture flesh, earning an agonized wail in return. “But he will pay me five million for a snuff film.”
RETIREMENT WOES
William had never been a cruel person before the squirrel moved onto his roof.
Two weeks into summer vacation, fourteen long days after he had bid his students farewell for the last time, William sat at the kitchen table in his boxers and white t-shirt under a tattered blue robe. A bowl of oatmeal sat untouched on the table next to the unread newspaper spread out before him.
Staring at the clock on the wall, he watched the minutes tick past and wondered what he was supposed to do with the rest of his life.
“William, will you please mow that lawn today?” His wife, Kristi, walked through the kitchen and into the dining room, a cloud of soft, floral perfume left floating in her wake. Smartly dressed in a peach blazer and skirt with her gray hair perfectly coiffed atop her head in a twist, she was ready for her day as a personal banker, the job she’d held since their kids had all started school.
“Hmmph.” William grunted, glancing at his wife, then returning his eyes to the clock.
“Oh William, really. Are you going to mope around here forever? How are you going to handle retirement if you can’t even find something to do for the summer? You’re used to having summers off.” Kristi pulled out a chair and perched lightly on the edge, grabbing his hand in her own and frowning. “Have you been taking those pills the doctor gave you?”
“I’m not depressed.” William also frowned, but it felt diluted in comparison to his wife’s stern countenance. Everything about her personality had always been more forceful, more vibrant. He had no delusions about who ran their household. “I’m just bored.”
“You know what you need, William?” Kristi’s favorite pastime had always been telling William what he needed. “You need a hobby. Rachel’s husband builds model cars and Ralph across the street does all that woodworking.”
“Those are old man hobbies.”
“We aren’t getting any younger, dear.” She patted his hand affectionately, but he pulled his own back.
“I’m not that old.” The whiny tone in his voice made him feel like a petulant child.
“Really, William? So what is this? Sitting around in your shorts all day feeling sorry for yourself? I swear, the least you can do is go out and get rid of that damned squirrel.”
“Squirrel?”
“Yeah. The squirrel that’s on the roof making Devon bark. Can’t you hear him? Or are you going deaf too?” Kristi stood and retrieved her purse, her back stiff and her chin raised in anger. With her hand on the doorknob she turned slightly, her eyes narrowed as she spoke. “You need to do something with yourself, William. I will not spend the next thirty years watching you give up and rot in that chair.”
William watched the door slam behind her. Standing to take a shower, he paused when he heard Devon begin to bay in the backyard.
He does sound upset about something, he thought, opting to forego the shower and just get dressed so he could investigate.
On his way to the door, William tripped over
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