it.
If those escaped convicts hadn’t tried to kill me, I might have
felt different. But only two days had gone by, and I wasn’t ready to forgive
them. I wanted to hurt those convicts. I wanted those bastards hurt so bad that
my stomach twisted in knots just thinking about it. I was angry with not just
them, I was angry with Yama because it wouldn't let me hurt the convicts. Yeah,
no, I wasn't feeling very sane just then.
Yama had already destroyed everything I had ever known. There
weren't going to be anymore musical groups, like Sick Puppies , no
new comics would come out about Superman , or Batman ,
or X-Men. There wouldn't even be any more thinking up of my
own stuff to write on the fan-fiction sites. I would never see the Chicago
University, or ride on the ‘L’ train again. Hell, I’d never have sex. That was
just wrong, damn it!
I turned off the television as Mom and Dad came into the room.
The announcement about the cookout had said that this was going to be a casual
affair. So I had just tossed on a pair of black and a t-shirt that said, ‘ The
Floggings Shall Continue Until Morale
Improves .’ It felt fitting somehow. After all, my morale wasn’t going to
improve much. I knew that. Mom smiled a little at my choice of shirts, but said
nothing.
I was silent as we left the house and drove to the high school.
Mom looked at me in the rearview mirror, worried at my silence. At one point,
she started to say something, but Dad touched her on the arm and shook his
head. He might not have been living with us all these years, but he still knew
my moods. While I didn’t want to yell at them, I also knew that if anyone said
anything to me, I’d snap.
Heading into the parking lot, I looked at the building I had
come to almost every morning for nearly four years. Once, I’d wanted to get
through high school as quick as I could. I now wanted to find a way to do it
over—the cliques, the fights, the laughter, the parties, the dances. I didn’t
want all of it obliterated. I felt a lump in my throat thinking how nice it
would be to be bored silly in high school for one more day. But that wasn’t
going to happen.
Getting out of the car, I counted maybe three dozen cars in the
parking lot. Usually on a school day, cars and pickups would pack the lot full.
I shook my head, saddened by the whole scene. With a quiet sigh, I walked into
the school with Mom and Dad walking behind me. Just inside the front doors to
the school, the Biology class teacher, Mark Wells and his were wife were busy
setting up a large indoor grill inside the school’s front atrium. Gina Carter,
the Home Economics teacher was offering joking suggestions about getting it to
work. Past all this, I could see people milling about in the school cafeteria.
It looked as if we were the last to arrive.
I heard laughter and joking. I could see kids running around and
playing games. I didn’t have a clue as to why everyone was so damn cheerful. I
was getting tense and the rage started to boil. I wanted to yell how
stupid they were. Damn it! Didn’t they
realize we were just hours away from dying? I started to say that aloud when I
felt a hand on my arm. I glanced up and saw it was Brand.
He shook his head, and mouthed, “Don’t!”
Before I could give a retort, Brand went over to Mom and Dad,
offering to take their coats. My parents were with the others at the grill,
giving them cheerful advice of their own. They were distracted, so they simply
thanked him and handed them over. I was about to walk over there to make a
snide remark, but Brand didn’t give me a chance. He came up to me with a
knowing look in his eyes.
He said, “Don’t do it. Come with me—now.”
I ignored him and started to push past him when he stopped me by
grabbing my arm. Without another word, he pulled me along into the school.
There, I saw Jim and Karla talking with others. Before they noticed us, Brand
dragged me down the hallway. We were the only
If those escaped convicts hadn’t tried to kill me, I might have
felt different. But only two days had gone by, and I wasn’t ready to forgive
them. I wanted to hurt those convicts. I wanted those bastards hurt so bad that
my stomach twisted in knots just thinking about it. I was angry with not just
them, I was angry with Yama because it wouldn't let me hurt the convicts. Yeah,
no, I wasn't feeling very sane just then.
Yama had already destroyed everything I had ever known. There
weren't going to be anymore musical groups, like Sick Puppies , no
new comics would come out about Superman , or Batman ,
or X-Men. There wouldn't even be any more thinking up of my
own stuff to write on the fan-fiction sites. I would never see the Chicago
University, or ride on the ‘L’ train again. Hell, I’d never have sex. That was
just wrong, damn it!
I turned off the television as Mom and Dad came into the room.
The announcement about the cookout had said that this was going to be a casual
affair. So I had just tossed on a pair of black and a t-shirt that said, ‘ The
Floggings Shall Continue Until Morale
Improves .’ It felt fitting somehow. After all, my morale wasn’t going to
improve much. I knew that. Mom smiled a little at my choice of shirts, but said
nothing.
I was silent as we left the house and drove to the high school.
Mom looked at me in the rearview mirror, worried at my silence. At one point,
she started to say something, but Dad touched her on the arm and shook his
head. He might not have been living with us all these years, but he still knew
my moods. While I didn’t want to yell at them, I also knew that if anyone said
anything to me, I’d snap.
Heading into the parking lot, I looked at the building I had
come to almost every morning for nearly four years. Once, I’d wanted to get
through high school as quick as I could. I now wanted to find a way to do it
over—the cliques, the fights, the laughter, the parties, the dances. I didn’t
want all of it obliterated. I felt a lump in my throat thinking how nice it
would be to be bored silly in high school for one more day. But that wasn’t
going to happen.
Getting out of the car, I counted maybe three dozen cars in the
parking lot. Usually on a school day, cars and pickups would pack the lot full.
I shook my head, saddened by the whole scene. With a quiet sigh, I walked into
the school with Mom and Dad walking behind me. Just inside the front doors to
the school, the Biology class teacher, Mark Wells and his were wife were busy
setting up a large indoor grill inside the school’s front atrium. Gina Carter,
the Home Economics teacher was offering joking suggestions about getting it to
work. Past all this, I could see people milling about in the school cafeteria.
It looked as if we were the last to arrive.
I heard laughter and joking. I could see kids running around and
playing games. I didn’t have a clue as to why everyone was so damn cheerful. I
was getting tense and the rage started to boil. I wanted to yell how
stupid they were. Damn it! Didn’t they
realize we were just hours away from dying? I started to say that aloud when I
felt a hand on my arm. I glanced up and saw it was Brand.
He shook his head, and mouthed, “Don’t!”
Before I could give a retort, Brand went over to Mom and Dad,
offering to take their coats. My parents were with the others at the grill,
giving them cheerful advice of their own. They were distracted, so they simply
thanked him and handed them over. I was about to walk over there to make a
snide remark, but Brand didn’t give me a chance. He came up to me with a
knowing look in his eyes.
He said, “Don’t do it. Come with me—now.”
I ignored him and started to push past him when he stopped me by
grabbing my arm. Without another word, he pulled me along into the school.
There, I saw Jim and Karla talking with others. Before they noticed us, Brand
dragged me down the hallway. We were the only
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