Around the World in 80 Dates by Jennifer Cox Page B

brown hair framing a thin, contemplative face. My entrance felt a bit scattered, in utter contrast to his quiet, serene pose at the window, and on seeing him I became gripped with the urge to fling myself down onto the reception sofa and blurt out everything that had happened to me so far. With steely resolve, I resisted the impulse. Instead, waiting for the Love Professor to transfer a huge armful of papers from right to left, I smiled warmly, shook his outstretched hand, and answered: “Yes, I had a lovely journey here, thank you, no problems at all. Quite uneventful. I’m sorry if I kept you waiting, shall we go?”
    He drove me out to the Japanese Gardens, a tranquil refuge at the top of a steep trail in the public gardens beyond the university where he worked. As we settled in a wooden arbor, off the path overlooking a bamboo garden, I explained my theory and mission to the Love Professor. If I did meet my Soul Mate, I asked, how would I know he was The One? Were there any signs or signals I should be looking for?
    â€œWell, we have a physical response which we define as sexual…,” he began cautiously, as if realizing for the first time that I had a vested interest in his answers. “Also understanding that although we all fall in love, few of us know anything more about it than how we feel.” Like technology: I can send you an email without either of us having the faintest clue how it got from my computer to yours. The Love Professor was about to explain the Love Equivalent of firewalls, IPs, wireless applications, and the laser printer.
    â€œâ€¦but it starts in the earliest relationship: the one between the mother and the child. It is an intense experience of trust and well-being: feeling everything is as good as it could be. To fall in love and to be close to another human being at any age in your life…” Uh-oh, not the whole oedipal thing.
    â€œSo when you fall in love,” I interrupted impatiently, “you’re looking to relive those bonds of comfort and security?”
    â€œYes, you are seeking to relive something you don’t consciously remember but your body does,” he replied.
    I knew this must be relevant somewhere, but time was short and I wasn’t looking to date either of my parents on this trip, so I moved it along.
    â€œSo apart from my historical needs, what about the physical side? How will I know if I’m attracted to somebody?” An obvious question, with an even more obvious answer, but the Love Professor didn’t seem to think me odd for wanting to know. Apparently you fall in love in three stages: lust, attraction, and attachment. Each stage has distinct characteristics, accompanied by set behavioral patterns and a variety of hormones. Evidently it was more complex than just thinking someone looked good in a leather jacket.
    The Love Professor gave me an example: “There are a number of factors working beneath your consciousness, and one of them is smell. Not only does smell influence you, your smell also carries information about your genetic makeup.”
    This was intriguing. “So am I wasting my time kissing when I should be sniffing?” I demanded.
    The Love Professor looked momentarily confused and then replied, “No, because kissing is a good opportunity to take a good sniff.”
    We both laughed. “I’m intrigued and a little concerned for your kissing technique,” I teased. Funnily enough, I found the fact that we were compelled to do romantic things for practical reasons really reassuring; almost as if it wasn’t totally my fault if I made a mess of it, nature had to take a share of the blame, too. “Okay, that’s a fantastic piece of information.” I beamed; we were getting somewhere now. “Are there any other things that will help me work out if my Dates are compatible or not with me when I first meet them? I only have one date with each of these people, so I have