after another. It’s like I died and ended up in some epistemological hell.” I shrugged and closed my eyes. “I don’t know if I’ve lost my mind, if I’m dead, if I’m dreaming…”
I reopened them, and Alice had the gun pointed at my chest.
“I just – I just want your help, Alice.” I raised my hands, hearing an edge in my voice. “If you want to call the police, if you want to – to shoot me, then go ahead. But I’m scared, and I don’t know what to do.”
She finally said, “You think this has something to do with the accident in the lab?”
I kept my hands up, and nodded slowly. “Definitely.”
“Well,” she shifted her balance and readjusted her grip on the gun. “Are you hallucinating now?”
“I don’t know, probably. Would you be able to tell me if you were a hallucination or not?”
“As far as I know, yes.”
“Alright,” I said. “If I can trust that you would tell me if you were a hallucination or not, I guess that I’m not hallucinating.”
Alice nodded, but she didn’t take the gun off my chest. “Other than Patrick shooting Joseph, and Joseph’s headless corpse trying to grab you – what, uh, else have you been seeing?”
I told her about the burn on my chest, bleeding to death by the bed, about the blackouts, and the sudden shift of different realities.
“Do you have a burn on your chest right now?”
I lifted my shirt, and nothing. Not even pink scar–tissue. It was healed. Alice slowly lowered the gun.
“I saw your chest at the hospital.” She took a tentative step forward and lightly brushed my skin, looking for any sign of previous trauma or injury, and finding nothing. “This isn’t possible.”
“Neither is the fact that I’m dripping wet and suddenly carrying Patrick’s gun.”
“Yeah.” She nodded slightly. She lifted the gun and said, “I’m going to hold onto this”
I didn’t mind.
Alice opened her mouth, but hesitated.
“If you have something to say then say it.”
“If I’m a hallucination,” she rolled her eyes. “Have you considered neurological damage?”
“Yeah, Alice… I have.”
“You were blown clear across the room – your visor was completely smashed and we had to put you out with a fire extinguisher. You were in a very, very bad state.”
“I know I was,” I said impatiently. “I know.”
“It could be brain damage. I technically may not even be real, but in the context of yourhallucination, how the hell would I be able to know the difference? As far as I know, I’m real.” She waved at the filing cabinets, the floor, the gun, me and her. “I’m right here, fully aware.”
“Brain damage,” I said. It seemed so self–evident and so obvious that I don’t know why I hadn’t considered it a bit more seriously. It crossed my mind, but I had been off balanced with everything since waking in the hospital, that I failed to give it more thought.
“I apologize,” Alice said. “I don’t mean to be so frank, but you said it yourself – you’re hallucinating. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that something is obviously wrong.”
“No,” I replied quietly. “It’s okay.”
“We technically would have shared at least two spellsnow. The coffee changing into whatever the hell it was, and then suddenly appearing together in the hallway by the elevator.” She looked at the filing cabinets. “Come to think of it, I can’t remember walking into thisroom. We were just suddenly here.”
We stood in silence for a few moments. “What do we do now?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I should probably go back to the hospital – talk to a doctor.”
“You think that’s a good idea?”
“No,” I said. “But I don’t know what else to do. If it’s brain damage, I have to take care of it, right?”
“That would probably be the smartest thing to do.”
“I just,” I hesitated. “I don’t want to go back there…”
“Why?”
“I’ve been there twice already. Both times, you
I reopened them, and Alice had the gun pointed at my chest.
“I just – I just want your help, Alice.” I raised my hands, hearing an edge in my voice. “If you want to call the police, if you want to – to shoot me, then go ahead. But I’m scared, and I don’t know what to do.”
She finally said, “You think this has something to do with the accident in the lab?”
I kept my hands up, and nodded slowly. “Definitely.”
“Well,” she shifted her balance and readjusted her grip on the gun. “Are you hallucinating now?”
“I don’t know, probably. Would you be able to tell me if you were a hallucination or not?”
“As far as I know, yes.”
“Alright,” I said. “If I can trust that you would tell me if you were a hallucination or not, I guess that I’m not hallucinating.”
Alice nodded, but she didn’t take the gun off my chest. “Other than Patrick shooting Joseph, and Joseph’s headless corpse trying to grab you – what, uh, else have you been seeing?”
I told her about the burn on my chest, bleeding to death by the bed, about the blackouts, and the sudden shift of different realities.
“Do you have a burn on your chest right now?”
I lifted my shirt, and nothing. Not even pink scar–tissue. It was healed. Alice slowly lowered the gun.
“I saw your chest at the hospital.” She took a tentative step forward and lightly brushed my skin, looking for any sign of previous trauma or injury, and finding nothing. “This isn’t possible.”
“Neither is the fact that I’m dripping wet and suddenly carrying Patrick’s gun.”
“Yeah.” She nodded slightly. She lifted the gun and said, “I’m going to hold onto this”
I didn’t mind.
Alice opened her mouth, but hesitated.
“If you have something to say then say it.”
“If I’m a hallucination,” she rolled her eyes. “Have you considered neurological damage?”
“Yeah, Alice… I have.”
“You were blown clear across the room – your visor was completely smashed and we had to put you out with a fire extinguisher. You were in a very, very bad state.”
“I know I was,” I said impatiently. “I know.”
“It could be brain damage. I technically may not even be real, but in the context of yourhallucination, how the hell would I be able to know the difference? As far as I know, I’m real.” She waved at the filing cabinets, the floor, the gun, me and her. “I’m right here, fully aware.”
“Brain damage,” I said. It seemed so self–evident and so obvious that I don’t know why I hadn’t considered it a bit more seriously. It crossed my mind, but I had been off balanced with everything since waking in the hospital, that I failed to give it more thought.
“I apologize,” Alice said. “I don’t mean to be so frank, but you said it yourself – you’re hallucinating. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that something is obviously wrong.”
“No,” I replied quietly. “It’s okay.”
“We technically would have shared at least two spellsnow. The coffee changing into whatever the hell it was, and then suddenly appearing together in the hallway by the elevator.” She looked at the filing cabinets. “Come to think of it, I can’t remember walking into thisroom. We were just suddenly here.”
We stood in silence for a few moments. “What do we do now?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I should probably go back to the hospital – talk to a doctor.”
“You think that’s a good idea?”
“No,” I said. “But I don’t know what else to do. If it’s brain damage, I have to take care of it, right?”
“That would probably be the smartest thing to do.”
“I just,” I hesitated. “I don’t want to go back there…”
“Why?”
“I’ve been there twice already. Both times, you
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