Awakening by Gillian Colbert, Elene Sallinger Page A

of some dark recess in her brain. The staccato nature of her words let Evan know this was not something she spoke of often or with ease. Finally, she quieted and the silence drew out.
    Evan found himself praying that Bridget would be compassionate with her. He was aware that while she’d never been judgmental of the life he and Marianne had chosen, she also wasn’t a practitioner. Her proclivities were as vanilla as they came. It was possible that what was so clear to Evan might not even occur to Bridget and, if she handled Claire incorrectly right now, Claire might never realise the truth of her situation.
    The silence dragged on, stretching the air tight like a rubber band. The waiting was beginning to grate on Evan. He wanted to see what was going on, but decided against moving for fear of drawing Claire’s attention. Hell, he wanted to shout at Bridget to answer already. Just as he thought he’d explode from the anticipation, he heard rustling from the back. Someone was moving around, and then Bridget finally broke the silence.
    ‘Don’t cry, hon,’ she said. Evan’s body went rigid at her words. An insane urge to go comfort Claire swamped him. ‘Shh, darlin’, it’s clear you regret what you did to him, but I think you haven’t forgiven yourself.’
    Evan managed to stay where he was, but he risked a quick glance around the stack. Bridget now sat on the coffee table, her back to him. She appeared to be holding Claire’s hand. Claire’s head was down and she was wiping frantically at her eyes. His heart clenched at the sight of her in pain. Claire began to raise her head and Evan ducked back behind the stacks.
    ‘How can I?’ Claire’s normally smoky voice was liquid with tears. ‘I damaged him. He has never been the same man. He eventually stopped hitting me no matter what I did to him, but by the end of our relationship, he hated me. He told me so.’
    ‘He probably did hate you, hon.’ Bridget spoke in a soothing tone, but Evan frowned at her words. They were less than sympathetic. ‘You manipulated him into doing something he didn’t want to do. That was abusive, you’re correct, but your real mistake was in not seeking to understand why you were doing it and, if you agreed with your rationale, finding someone willing to do it to you.’
    Claire snorted in a derisive exhalation. ‘Who on earth is willing to beat a woman who isn’t some kind of axe murderer?’
    ‘You’d be surprised. You’re not the only person in the world who receives a physical or psychological benefit from being beaten. The key is to find a partner who is experienced and who knows how to do it without truly harming you.’
    ‘Isn’t the beating harming me by definition?’
    ‘No, darlin’, it’s not. The beating is the experience you’re looking for, and because of that it is a benefit to you. It’s only when mistakes happen or your partner goes too far that harm happens. Once it goes beyond the realm of what you negotiated …’ Bridget exhaled roughly. ‘Listen, hon, I’m really not the right person to instruct you in this. I don’t practice BDSM, but I’ve been exposed to it a little bit.’
    ‘BDSM? Are you talking about sadomasochism? I’m not into whips and chains and blood!’ Claire’s voice was shrill.
    ‘No, hon. I’m not,’ Bridget soothed. ‘There are people who get into a more extreme version of what I’m talking about, but I’m talking about beating play or something along that line. I don’t recall the name. I know Evan has an erotica section, you should see if you can find some books there. It will give you the info I don’t have.’
    Ding. The bell over the door snapped Evan’s attention away from the women. He stood as smoothly as possible and headed to the front of the store. The women’s conversation faded gently as he greeted the new arrival. Bridget was right. Claire needed to understand that while what she’d done was wrong, it was wrong because Charlie was an unwilling