can do. I don’t own a ship, nor do I command a crew. And to be honest, I don’t want you to go.”
She grabbed his hand. “Cleve, I like you, but you’re mad. How can you possibly believe you’ll be returning to Kyrro? The only way that would happen is with help from my father—a lot of help. Stay by me. Help our family. In time, you may be able to request a ship, but certainly not without something to give for it.” Her shoulders slumped. “I think that’s the fairest I can be, given the circumstances. But if you’re leaving, you’d better wait until I find someone else. I’m not marrying Kasko Lage, that monster.”
Completely surprised by her cooperation, he leaned forward and squeezed her. “That’s more than fair.”
“Who knows,” she uttered with difficulty from his tight embrace, “maybe when that time comes, you won’t want to leave anymore.”
So that’s her plan, he realized. She thinks if I spend enough time with her I’ll change my mind. That’s why she’s not so upset by this.
Her hands came up to his face. “But you have to do something for me right now. And I’d better not have to ask for it or tell you what it is.”
Cleve understood. He closed his eyes and put his mouth against hers.
They tried to move their lips once they were touching, but it was sloppy and uncoordinated.
Jessend pushed him away. With a tilted head, she looked confused.
“Let’s try that again.”
Cleve felt a dry swallow as he leaned in. This time their lips connected like a handshake…perhaps too much like a handshake, gripping each other tightly and then getting lost as they came loose.
She pushed him away harder this time, making a sour face. “Are you doing that on purpose?”
“Doing what?”
“I don’t know,” Jessend let her voice trail off. “It feels strange, but I don’t know why.”
“It does. But I’m not doing anything on purpose to make it that way.” That’s how I kissed Reela, and it worked far better than this, he almost said.
“Kiss me again. Kiss me like you mean it, like I’m this other girl.” Her grossly obvious plan was coming out even more now. She figured with enough time he could learn to feel the same way about her that he did for Reela. She didn’t even seem concerned about hiding it.
Cleve was so confident it wouldn’t work, he wasn’t worried.
They tried a third time, and their lips fell into a smooth pattern. There was rhythmic smacking as they pressed their lips to each other’s. But Cleve felt no urge for more of her like he did for Reela. He didn’t mind the kiss, yet he didn’t long for it, either.
But soon he changed his mind. The kiss was becoming strange, like how he would feel if he and Effie kissed. He felt obligated to keep his lips against hers, though.
Luckily, she pulled away. Her face said it all. “I feel like I’m kissing my brother.”
“It’s the same for me.”
“But why?”
“Because I’m not who you want me to be,” Cleve told her.
Sadness began to swell in her glistening eyes. “And I’m not either, am I?”
“No.” No girl is like Reela.
Her gaze drifted away, and Cleve could see the deep pain on her face.
“That’s how it was with the last man I was with,” she said. “I thought it would go away.” Tears began to roll down her cheek, though her voice didn’t waver. “Ever since the first man I loved died, kissing everyone else has been like this. Why can’t I feel the same way I did with him?”
Cleve could feel the same hurt squeezing his chest. “I know what it’s like to lose someone like that.” Tired, he decided to ease her down onto her side, wrapping his arm around her as he lay beside her.
“You loved a girl you lost?” Jessend asked, wiping her tears.
“A little different than that. My parents were killed.” The familiar ache of death surged through his body. With a tight stomach, he could feel himself wanting to cry. Images of the men he’d killed earlier twirled through
She grabbed his hand. “Cleve, I like you, but you’re mad. How can you possibly believe you’ll be returning to Kyrro? The only way that would happen is with help from my father—a lot of help. Stay by me. Help our family. In time, you may be able to request a ship, but certainly not without something to give for it.” Her shoulders slumped. “I think that’s the fairest I can be, given the circumstances. But if you’re leaving, you’d better wait until I find someone else. I’m not marrying Kasko Lage, that monster.”
Completely surprised by her cooperation, he leaned forward and squeezed her. “That’s more than fair.”
“Who knows,” she uttered with difficulty from his tight embrace, “maybe when that time comes, you won’t want to leave anymore.”
So that’s her plan, he realized. She thinks if I spend enough time with her I’ll change my mind. That’s why she’s not so upset by this.
Her hands came up to his face. “But you have to do something for me right now. And I’d better not have to ask for it or tell you what it is.”
Cleve understood. He closed his eyes and put his mouth against hers.
They tried to move their lips once they were touching, but it was sloppy and uncoordinated.
Jessend pushed him away. With a tilted head, she looked confused.
“Let’s try that again.”
Cleve felt a dry swallow as he leaned in. This time their lips connected like a handshake…perhaps too much like a handshake, gripping each other tightly and then getting lost as they came loose.
She pushed him away harder this time, making a sour face. “Are you doing that on purpose?”
“Doing what?”
“I don’t know,” Jessend let her voice trail off. “It feels strange, but I don’t know why.”
“It does. But I’m not doing anything on purpose to make it that way.” That’s how I kissed Reela, and it worked far better than this, he almost said.
“Kiss me again. Kiss me like you mean it, like I’m this other girl.” Her grossly obvious plan was coming out even more now. She figured with enough time he could learn to feel the same way about her that he did for Reela. She didn’t even seem concerned about hiding it.
Cleve was so confident it wouldn’t work, he wasn’t worried.
They tried a third time, and their lips fell into a smooth pattern. There was rhythmic smacking as they pressed their lips to each other’s. But Cleve felt no urge for more of her like he did for Reela. He didn’t mind the kiss, yet he didn’t long for it, either.
But soon he changed his mind. The kiss was becoming strange, like how he would feel if he and Effie kissed. He felt obligated to keep his lips against hers, though.
Luckily, she pulled away. Her face said it all. “I feel like I’m kissing my brother.”
“It’s the same for me.”
“But why?”
“Because I’m not who you want me to be,” Cleve told her.
Sadness began to swell in her glistening eyes. “And I’m not either, am I?”
“No.” No girl is like Reela.
Her gaze drifted away, and Cleve could see the deep pain on her face.
“That’s how it was with the last man I was with,” she said. “I thought it would go away.” Tears began to roll down her cheek, though her voice didn’t waver. “Ever since the first man I loved died, kissing everyone else has been like this. Why can’t I feel the same way I did with him?”
Cleve could feel the same hurt squeezing his chest. “I know what it’s like to lose someone like that.” Tired, he decided to ease her down onto her side, wrapping his arm around her as he lay beside her.
“You loved a girl you lost?” Jessend asked, wiping her tears.
“A little different than that. My parents were killed.” The familiar ache of death surged through his body. With a tight stomach, he could feel himself wanting to cry. Images of the men he’d killed earlier twirled through
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