think getting drunk is going to solve your problems?” My dad’s voice is loud and feels like a hammer to my head. He puts his arm around me, pulling my weight up so I’m now in a sitting position
“Where am I?” I ask, unsure. I honestly have no idea until I recognize that ugly blanket Lisa made in high school and realize I’m still at her house
“Ugh, my head.” I groan. My dad forces a cup of coffee into my hand.
“This, what you’re doing, is not going to be your answer,” my dad says gruffly. I lift the cup to my mouth, but before I can even drink it, the smell makes my stomach churn, and I set it down.
“We’re in a bad situation. Is it the end of the world? No? But if you become a self-pitying drunk it will be,” he says sharply, “an d whether we like it or not, you’re a father now so we’re going to have to figure this thing out with this woman. Sooner rather than later.”
He can ’t think I’m in any condition to talk to him about the state or plan for my life now.
“I just want to sleep,” I mumble, putting the coffee down on the floor, and I lie back down on the couch.
“I’m not sure what your plan is, but if you’re still engaged to Jenna or plan on being, I suggest you get up and come home. I’m sure she won’t be happy that you’re here of all places, and you probably haven’t called her since I found your phone in the dirt in our yard,” he warns.
Jenna.
Her name makes me sit up.
I’ ve told her a thousand times Lisa and I are just friends, and have been since kindergarten, but she says as long as she has breasts and a vagina she’ll never trust her.
It takes a minute , but with my dad’s help, I make it out of Lisa’s house, into the truck, and back home to my bed. I ignored the disapproving lecture he gave me all the way home. I think I deserved a night like last night after all I’ve gone through.
My mom must ’ve agreed since she cleaned my room and tucked me in like I was twelve then brought me ibuprofen, after I managed to hold down a piece of toast. My bed is much better than Lisa’s couch
***
I wake up, still in my room but the sky’s dark. The birds are already making noise so it must be early morning. I sit up and see the clock on my desk says that its 5:11 am. I must have slept straight through yesterday. I feel a lot better. My stomach is empty, growling, and the smell of bacon coming from down stairs has coaxed me out of my sleep. The splitting pain in my head is gone now, just a dull ache replacing it.
I pick out a t- shirt, jeans, and boxers and make my way to the shower and wash the stink of vomit and whiskey off me.
I haven’ t talked to Jenna at all. I told her I’d call her after I talked to my parents, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I don’t know what to tell her. I don’t know where we go from here.
I needed a day off from feel ing and thinking. But now it just seems like a day wasted. I was sort of prepared to confirm that she was right. To explain to her that what I have is an actual condition and not some made up crap. Knowing her though, she’s figured everything out. She may have possibly been willing to stay with me; it wasn’t like I couldn’t get a divorce, which I’m not even sure this marriage is even legitimate . I’m sure the girl…Lauren. I have to stop calling her the girl. She’s not some random woman after all…Lauren would’ve agreed to sever ties after realizing I’m not the man she loves.
But a kid, knowing that I have a child with someone else...that’s something I don’t think Jenna will accept and I can’t blame her. I’d just like to hold on the memory of me being happily engaged to the woman I chose and thinking what our kids would look like a little longer.
Well , there wouldn’t have been any kids until she finished law school, passed the bar, and established herself within a firm... but that’s irrelevant now. After I brush my teeth and throw
“Where am I?” I ask, unsure. I honestly have no idea until I recognize that ugly blanket Lisa made in high school and realize I’m still at her house
“Ugh, my head.” I groan. My dad forces a cup of coffee into my hand.
“This, what you’re doing, is not going to be your answer,” my dad says gruffly. I lift the cup to my mouth, but before I can even drink it, the smell makes my stomach churn, and I set it down.
“We’re in a bad situation. Is it the end of the world? No? But if you become a self-pitying drunk it will be,” he says sharply, “an d whether we like it or not, you’re a father now so we’re going to have to figure this thing out with this woman. Sooner rather than later.”
He can ’t think I’m in any condition to talk to him about the state or plan for my life now.
“I just want to sleep,” I mumble, putting the coffee down on the floor, and I lie back down on the couch.
“I’m not sure what your plan is, but if you’re still engaged to Jenna or plan on being, I suggest you get up and come home. I’m sure she won’t be happy that you’re here of all places, and you probably haven’t called her since I found your phone in the dirt in our yard,” he warns.
Jenna.
Her name makes me sit up.
I’ ve told her a thousand times Lisa and I are just friends, and have been since kindergarten, but she says as long as she has breasts and a vagina she’ll never trust her.
It takes a minute , but with my dad’s help, I make it out of Lisa’s house, into the truck, and back home to my bed. I ignored the disapproving lecture he gave me all the way home. I think I deserved a night like last night after all I’ve gone through.
My mom must ’ve agreed since she cleaned my room and tucked me in like I was twelve then brought me ibuprofen, after I managed to hold down a piece of toast. My bed is much better than Lisa’s couch
***
I wake up, still in my room but the sky’s dark. The birds are already making noise so it must be early morning. I sit up and see the clock on my desk says that its 5:11 am. I must have slept straight through yesterday. I feel a lot better. My stomach is empty, growling, and the smell of bacon coming from down stairs has coaxed me out of my sleep. The splitting pain in my head is gone now, just a dull ache replacing it.
I pick out a t- shirt, jeans, and boxers and make my way to the shower and wash the stink of vomit and whiskey off me.
I haven’ t talked to Jenna at all. I told her I’d call her after I talked to my parents, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I don’t know what to tell her. I don’t know where we go from here.
I needed a day off from feel ing and thinking. But now it just seems like a day wasted. I was sort of prepared to confirm that she was right. To explain to her that what I have is an actual condition and not some made up crap. Knowing her though, she’s figured everything out. She may have possibly been willing to stay with me; it wasn’t like I couldn’t get a divorce, which I’m not even sure this marriage is even legitimate . I’m sure the girl…Lauren. I have to stop calling her the girl. She’s not some random woman after all…Lauren would’ve agreed to sever ties after realizing I’m not the man she loves.
But a kid, knowing that I have a child with someone else...that’s something I don’t think Jenna will accept and I can’t blame her. I’d just like to hold on the memory of me being happily engaged to the woman I chose and thinking what our kids would look like a little longer.
Well , there wouldn’t have been any kids until she finished law school, passed the bar, and established herself within a firm... but that’s irrelevant now. After I brush my teeth and throw
Similar Books
