was evidently excavating to China. “Er…so, is this your first
time in the Caribbean?”
“Yes.”
“Ah.”
He tugged a bit more persistently on the leash. The
shrub trembled for a moment, a few twigs snapped sharply, and then
a low, threatening growl heralded Jesus's arrival. Branches parted
to reveal a feline rear end. The cat backed out of the leaves,
rumbling softly to himself as he dragged a small piece of sky-blue
cloth over to his owner, plopping his butt down on Adam's toes to
present him with his find with a look of great satisfaction.
“What the hell…?” Adam wrestled the cloth from the
cat's mouth and claws. “Let go of it, dammit! Whatever it is, it's
dirty. I don't want you to have it.”
Hero watched in silence as he scooted the cat off
his feet, squatting next to the animal, prying his mouth open to
unhook the cloth from Jesus's sharp teeth.
Adam looked up. “I think there's a
bit of retriever in him,” he joked weakly, mentally moaning to
himself. This was just what he needed, for Jesus to act up and make
him look like an idiot in front of the one woman he wanted to make
a good impression on. “Give it to me, cat! Damn it, I'm not playing
with you, give me the blasted
thing !”
Jesus spat out the cloth and turned to Hero,
standing on his back legs and patting her knees with his front
paws, giving her his piteous silent meow and a look that would do a
starving orphan facing eviction into a blizzard proud.
“Oh, you poor thing!” she crooned, clearly falling
for his pathetic act. She bent down to scoop him up, staggering a
little when she tried to straighten up with the full weight of him
in her arms. She recovered nicely, however, and glared at Adam over
the cat's head. “You shouted at him!”
Adam held up his hand. A torn and dirt-encrusted
pair of women's sky blue underwear dangled from his fingers. “Yes,
I did. I have a rule that he's not allowed to bring home strange
women's panties. I'm silly that way.”
Her eyebrows went up. “You trained
your cat to fetch knickers from women who are not strangers?”
“No, certainly not! He just likes them.”
The look of disbelief on her face said it all.
“I mean, he just likes to find things and retrieve
them. It doesn't matter what the object is.”
She continued to stare at him, making him feel as
though he were in fourth grade and caught kissing Betty Sue Seymore
behind the jungle gym. “Look, he's a strange cat; I have little
control over him. He likes to find things. I can count the number
of times he's brought me panties on the fingers of one hand.” He
thought for a moment. “Well, all right, two hands, but that's only
because my girlfriend was living with me at the time and there were
panties everywhere. I couldn't expect him to just ignore them, now
could I?”
She pursed her lips, looked like she was going to
argue the point, then shook her head and simply said, “I think,
perhaps, we should let this particular subject drop.”
“I think you're right,” he agreed with no little
sense of relief. What was it about this woman that made him feel
like he were a gauche young man on his first serious date?
Hero frowned at the underwear, then down on Jesus's
head. The cat's look of smug satisfaction at being held melted into
one of innocence and feline sainthood. Adam was not amused. He
tossed the underwear into a nearby trash receptacle and retrieved
his cat, setting him on the ground. “Behave yourself and I'll let
you have a can of sardines later.”
Jesus gave him a one-eyed, annoyed stare before
leading the way down the path.
“He's limping quite heavily, don't you think you
should carry him?” Hero asked as she strolled next to Adam, her
eyes on the cat a few feet ahead of her. “His leg must be
hurting.”
“Just ignore it, it's an act. He's fine. When his
leg hurts, he lets me know.”
“How?” she asked, just as he knew she would.
“He bites me, “ Adam replied, enjoying the
tantalizing scent of
time in the Caribbean?”
“Yes.”
“Ah.”
He tugged a bit more persistently on the leash. The
shrub trembled for a moment, a few twigs snapped sharply, and then
a low, threatening growl heralded Jesus's arrival. Branches parted
to reveal a feline rear end. The cat backed out of the leaves,
rumbling softly to himself as he dragged a small piece of sky-blue
cloth over to his owner, plopping his butt down on Adam's toes to
present him with his find with a look of great satisfaction.
“What the hell…?” Adam wrestled the cloth from the
cat's mouth and claws. “Let go of it, dammit! Whatever it is, it's
dirty. I don't want you to have it.”
Hero watched in silence as he scooted the cat off
his feet, squatting next to the animal, prying his mouth open to
unhook the cloth from Jesus's sharp teeth.
Adam looked up. “I think there's a
bit of retriever in him,” he joked weakly, mentally moaning to
himself. This was just what he needed, for Jesus to act up and make
him look like an idiot in front of the one woman he wanted to make
a good impression on. “Give it to me, cat! Damn it, I'm not playing
with you, give me the blasted
thing !”
Jesus spat out the cloth and turned to Hero,
standing on his back legs and patting her knees with his front
paws, giving her his piteous silent meow and a look that would do a
starving orphan facing eviction into a blizzard proud.
“Oh, you poor thing!” she crooned, clearly falling
for his pathetic act. She bent down to scoop him up, staggering a
little when she tried to straighten up with the full weight of him
in her arms. She recovered nicely, however, and glared at Adam over
the cat's head. “You shouted at him!”
Adam held up his hand. A torn and dirt-encrusted
pair of women's sky blue underwear dangled from his fingers. “Yes,
I did. I have a rule that he's not allowed to bring home strange
women's panties. I'm silly that way.”
Her eyebrows went up. “You trained
your cat to fetch knickers from women who are not strangers?”
“No, certainly not! He just likes them.”
The look of disbelief on her face said it all.
“I mean, he just likes to find things and retrieve
them. It doesn't matter what the object is.”
She continued to stare at him, making him feel as
though he were in fourth grade and caught kissing Betty Sue Seymore
behind the jungle gym. “Look, he's a strange cat; I have little
control over him. He likes to find things. I can count the number
of times he's brought me panties on the fingers of one hand.” He
thought for a moment. “Well, all right, two hands, but that's only
because my girlfriend was living with me at the time and there were
panties everywhere. I couldn't expect him to just ignore them, now
could I?”
She pursed her lips, looked like she was going to
argue the point, then shook her head and simply said, “I think,
perhaps, we should let this particular subject drop.”
“I think you're right,” he agreed with no little
sense of relief. What was it about this woman that made him feel
like he were a gauche young man on his first serious date?
Hero frowned at the underwear, then down on Jesus's
head. The cat's look of smug satisfaction at being held melted into
one of innocence and feline sainthood. Adam was not amused. He
tossed the underwear into a nearby trash receptacle and retrieved
his cat, setting him on the ground. “Behave yourself and I'll let
you have a can of sardines later.”
Jesus gave him a one-eyed, annoyed stare before
leading the way down the path.
“He's limping quite heavily, don't you think you
should carry him?” Hero asked as she strolled next to Adam, her
eyes on the cat a few feet ahead of her. “His leg must be
hurting.”
“Just ignore it, it's an act. He's fine. When his
leg hurts, he lets me know.”
“How?” she asked, just as he knew she would.
“He bites me, “ Adam replied, enjoying the
tantalizing scent of
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