not.”
She let out a frustrated growl. “Okay.” She raked at her hair, the pain of her nails on her scalp almost too much. “But the rest of Australia doesn’t know that. Matt’s parents don’t know that, our friends don’t. You’re the only one who knows.”
A long sigh sounded through the connection. “Caitlin…” Frustration filled her uncle’s voice. Frustration and disappointment.
Caitlin closed her eyes, unable to look at the painting on the wall any longer. Matt had given it to her a month before he left. Looking at it now only made her ache more. A heavy lump filled her throat. A sick tension rolled in her tummy.
“Caitlin,” Liev repeated her name, this time with less frustration and disappointment and more patience. “I don’t want to sound horrible, you know that. And God knows, I love you more than breath itself, but it’s been over eight months, kiddo. Eight months. The Somali government has officially declared him dead. The Australian government is on the verge of doing the same. You can’t spend your life in a holding pattern waiting for him to come back when all evidence says he won’t, especially when you both decided you needed a break before he left.”
“There’s never been a body, Uncle L,” she whispered, words her uncle had heard from her before. A heavy weight wrapped her chest. The sick tension in her stomach churned. She opened her eyes and stared at her left ring finger, at the spot her engagement ring had been until the day before Matt had flown out of the country for Somalia. There was no evidence a sparkling diamond and gold symbol of commitment had ever encircled her finger. Not now.
“How can I truly end all this without a body? When the rest of the country thinks…when the Australian government still refers to me as an example of…to help focus on…”
“Kiddo,” Liev murmured, “you’re twenty-seven. You’re beautiful. You’re intelligent. You’re successful. And you’re lonely. I know you are. And it tears me apart knowing you’re shutting off a life of happiness and love and passion because you feel pressured into maintaining a relationship that was on hold anyway, just because he maybe…is most likely dead. You’re hurting yourself waiting—”
“For Matt to come home?’ Caitlin cut him off. “How can I let his parents know we were over before he left without looking like a callous bitch?”
It was a ridiculous question of course. Caitlin knew that.
Seven months and twenty-nine days ago, her fiancé of six months, her boyfriend of two years had told her he was heading to Somalia to work with Doctors Without Borders. She hadn’t been surprised. Matt was born to be a doctor and he’d always put others above himself. Nor had she been surprised when he suggested they take a break while he was there.
She’d been the first to admit they’d grown apart since their wild, university-days romance when everything had been safe and real life hadn’t impacted them. Since graduating and absorbing themselves in their chosen professions, they’d become a walking cliché—two people who had fallen in love before reality could demonstrate they really never should have been together.
She’d agreed to the split, her heart aching even as she’d known it was the right move. When he’d asked if they could wait until he returned from his three months in Somalia before announcing it to their family and friends, she’d agreed to that as well. She did love him, dammit, and hadn’t wanted to make the horribly right decision more…horrible. After all, his parents would be heartbroken and she was in no rush to cause them that pain.
That pain—the pain of their son and his fiancée going their separate ways—was nothing, however, compared to the pain of learning he was possibly dead.
He hadn’t been seen or heard from since his Doctors Without Borders’ camp in Somalia had been raided by Al-Shabaab militants a week after he’d arrived. The chances
She let out a frustrated growl. “Okay.” She raked at her hair, the pain of her nails on her scalp almost too much. “But the rest of Australia doesn’t know that. Matt’s parents don’t know that, our friends don’t. You’re the only one who knows.”
A long sigh sounded through the connection. “Caitlin…” Frustration filled her uncle’s voice. Frustration and disappointment.
Caitlin closed her eyes, unable to look at the painting on the wall any longer. Matt had given it to her a month before he left. Looking at it now only made her ache more. A heavy lump filled her throat. A sick tension rolled in her tummy.
“Caitlin,” Liev repeated her name, this time with less frustration and disappointment and more patience. “I don’t want to sound horrible, you know that. And God knows, I love you more than breath itself, but it’s been over eight months, kiddo. Eight months. The Somali government has officially declared him dead. The Australian government is on the verge of doing the same. You can’t spend your life in a holding pattern waiting for him to come back when all evidence says he won’t, especially when you both decided you needed a break before he left.”
“There’s never been a body, Uncle L,” she whispered, words her uncle had heard from her before. A heavy weight wrapped her chest. The sick tension in her stomach churned. She opened her eyes and stared at her left ring finger, at the spot her engagement ring had been until the day before Matt had flown out of the country for Somalia. There was no evidence a sparkling diamond and gold symbol of commitment had ever encircled her finger. Not now.
“How can I truly end all this without a body? When the rest of the country thinks…when the Australian government still refers to me as an example of…to help focus on…”
“Kiddo,” Liev murmured, “you’re twenty-seven. You’re beautiful. You’re intelligent. You’re successful. And you’re lonely. I know you are. And it tears me apart knowing you’re shutting off a life of happiness and love and passion because you feel pressured into maintaining a relationship that was on hold anyway, just because he maybe…is most likely dead. You’re hurting yourself waiting—”
“For Matt to come home?’ Caitlin cut him off. “How can I let his parents know we were over before he left without looking like a callous bitch?”
It was a ridiculous question of course. Caitlin knew that.
Seven months and twenty-nine days ago, her fiancé of six months, her boyfriend of two years had told her he was heading to Somalia to work with Doctors Without Borders. She hadn’t been surprised. Matt was born to be a doctor and he’d always put others above himself. Nor had she been surprised when he suggested they take a break while he was there.
She’d been the first to admit they’d grown apart since their wild, university-days romance when everything had been safe and real life hadn’t impacted them. Since graduating and absorbing themselves in their chosen professions, they’d become a walking cliché—two people who had fallen in love before reality could demonstrate they really never should have been together.
She’d agreed to the split, her heart aching even as she’d known it was the right move. When he’d asked if they could wait until he returned from his three months in Somalia before announcing it to their family and friends, she’d agreed to that as well. She did love him, dammit, and hadn’t wanted to make the horribly right decision more…horrible. After all, his parents would be heartbroken and she was in no rush to cause them that pain.
That pain—the pain of their son and his fiancée going their separate ways—was nothing, however, compared to the pain of learning he was possibly dead.
He hadn’t been seen or heard from since his Doctors Without Borders’ camp in Somalia had been raided by Al-Shabaab militants a week after he’d arrived. The chances
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