mean?” he asked. “What you just said.”
I swallowed hard. “He stopped by the apartment yesterday. Out of the blue.”
“Just like that kid to do that. How much did he burn you for? You didn’t let him in your house, did you?”
“He’s different now,” I said. “You should see him. He looks great. Like a new man.”
“New man,” my father said. “Please. He’s my son and I love him but he’s the sneakiest bastard I ever met.”
“He wasn’t high,” I said. “He hasn’t been high in over a year.”
“Then where has that boy been?” Dad said, teeth clenched. “Does he know about his mother? Did he even ask?”
“Of course he did,” I lied.
“Wha’d he say when you told him?”
“I didn’t tell him,” I said. “I . . . I didn’t know if he was ready yet. I thought maybe you’d want to tell him about it, or we could tell him together.”
My father slid his hands into his pockets, relaxing his shoulders. He stood over me like when I was a kid—when he wasn’t angry with me, he was just so disappointed.
“Look at you, boy. One day back in your life and you’re lying through your teeth for him. Just like always. When’re you gonna learn?”
“He’s my brother,” I said. “Your brother wasn’t such a saint, either.”
“Johnny had his faults, rest his soul. Spent too much time with the wrong people. Right from when we were kids, even, running around with those Southside Boys. But Johnny never stole from his family. Never once. He never turned his back on us like your brother did when there was nothing left to take. My brother wasn’t a filthy junkie, like my son.”
I wanted to stand, to face my father toe-to-toe and defend my brother. I stayed in my seat. Danny’s case for redemption seemed even shakier in the face of my father’s wrath. I was the one who taught it for a living, but my father held history closer to his heart than I did.
“He’s different this time,” I mumbled. “He deserves a second chance.”
“A second chance? I’ve lost count of that boy’s chances.” My father sat down heavily in his chair. “He gets no more from me.”
Danny didn’t need any more chances from him, anyway. My mother had an endless supply. With my father safely seated across the room, I finally got up. I’d done my duty. I shouldn’t have come. Or I should have given Danny more time to prove himself. “So I shouldn’t bring him by.”
“Don’t,” my father said. His face relented, just a little bit. “Not yet. Maybe soon. Your mother would never forgive us if she missed a chance to see him, whatever state he’s in.” He stared down into his palms, thinking. “But if you bring Danny by, you better be sure he’s sticking around this time, Kevin. She can’t take another one of his disappearing acts. If you’re not sure, keep him away from her.”
“We’re getting together tomorrow night,” I said. “I’ll let him know about Mom. He’ll come see her, on his best behavior. I promise.”
“Forget what he says,” my father warned me. “Figure out what he’s after. This is on you, Kevin. This time, if he breaks her heart again, I’m holding you responsible.” He tilted his head back against the chair, staring at the ceiling. “Now go. I need some time to forget this conversation before your mother gets home.”
I didn’t know what else to do so I headed for the door.
“Wait,” Dad said. He met me at the door.
“I know how you feel, Kevin,” he said. “I really do. It’s not like I don’t miss Daniel, the way he used to be, at least. You were quite a pair, you two. Joy of your mother’s life.” He slipped his arm across my shoulders and kissed my cheek. I could feel his breath in my ear. “Be a good brother, Kevin, but be careful. Be very, very careful. I don’t like seeing you get hurt, either. The Danny we knew went away a long time ago.”
FIVE
THAT FRIDAY AFTERNOON, MY WORKWEEK ENDED WITH A CALL from Dean Whitestone’s
I swallowed hard. “He stopped by the apartment yesterday. Out of the blue.”
“Just like that kid to do that. How much did he burn you for? You didn’t let him in your house, did you?”
“He’s different now,” I said. “You should see him. He looks great. Like a new man.”
“New man,” my father said. “Please. He’s my son and I love him but he’s the sneakiest bastard I ever met.”
“He wasn’t high,” I said. “He hasn’t been high in over a year.”
“Then where has that boy been?” Dad said, teeth clenched. “Does he know about his mother? Did he even ask?”
“Of course he did,” I lied.
“Wha’d he say when you told him?”
“I didn’t tell him,” I said. “I . . . I didn’t know if he was ready yet. I thought maybe you’d want to tell him about it, or we could tell him together.”
My father slid his hands into his pockets, relaxing his shoulders. He stood over me like when I was a kid—when he wasn’t angry with me, he was just so disappointed.
“Look at you, boy. One day back in your life and you’re lying through your teeth for him. Just like always. When’re you gonna learn?”
“He’s my brother,” I said. “Your brother wasn’t such a saint, either.”
“Johnny had his faults, rest his soul. Spent too much time with the wrong people. Right from when we were kids, even, running around with those Southside Boys. But Johnny never stole from his family. Never once. He never turned his back on us like your brother did when there was nothing left to take. My brother wasn’t a filthy junkie, like my son.”
I wanted to stand, to face my father toe-to-toe and defend my brother. I stayed in my seat. Danny’s case for redemption seemed even shakier in the face of my father’s wrath. I was the one who taught it for a living, but my father held history closer to his heart than I did.
“He’s different this time,” I mumbled. “He deserves a second chance.”
“A second chance? I’ve lost count of that boy’s chances.” My father sat down heavily in his chair. “He gets no more from me.”
Danny didn’t need any more chances from him, anyway. My mother had an endless supply. With my father safely seated across the room, I finally got up. I’d done my duty. I shouldn’t have come. Or I should have given Danny more time to prove himself. “So I shouldn’t bring him by.”
“Don’t,” my father said. His face relented, just a little bit. “Not yet. Maybe soon. Your mother would never forgive us if she missed a chance to see him, whatever state he’s in.” He stared down into his palms, thinking. “But if you bring Danny by, you better be sure he’s sticking around this time, Kevin. She can’t take another one of his disappearing acts. If you’re not sure, keep him away from her.”
“We’re getting together tomorrow night,” I said. “I’ll let him know about Mom. He’ll come see her, on his best behavior. I promise.”
“Forget what he says,” my father warned me. “Figure out what he’s after. This is on you, Kevin. This time, if he breaks her heart again, I’m holding you responsible.” He tilted his head back against the chair, staring at the ceiling. “Now go. I need some time to forget this conversation before your mother gets home.”
I didn’t know what else to do so I headed for the door.
“Wait,” Dad said. He met me at the door.
“I know how you feel, Kevin,” he said. “I really do. It’s not like I don’t miss Daniel, the way he used to be, at least. You were quite a pair, you two. Joy of your mother’s life.” He slipped his arm across my shoulders and kissed my cheek. I could feel his breath in my ear. “Be a good brother, Kevin, but be careful. Be very, very careful. I don’t like seeing you get hurt, either. The Danny we knew went away a long time ago.”
FIVE
THAT FRIDAY AFTERNOON, MY WORKWEEK ENDED WITH A CALL from Dean Whitestone’s
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