me and got me turned right side up. He pulled my head above water just as another wave crashed over us, and he…”
For the first time, Zane’s voice broke. Humiliating tears burned like acid behind his eyes, but he clenched his back teeth and got through it. “My brother got his hands under my arms and lifted me up, over his head, and somehow I got on top of the wave and rode it in toward shore a little ways. Enough that I could touch down. I turned to try and find Michael, to grab him and pull him in with me. But he was gone.”
Felicity’s fingers spasmed in his hold. “Zane, oh. Oh my God.”
It was a prayer, more than anything else—a prayer for mercy, for help, for something to ease the pain. But there was nothing. “My brother saved me. And in doing so, he lost his own life.”
Zane dashed the tears from his cheeks and scrubbed his hand over his face. In a choked voice, Felicity said, “Don’t. It’s okay to cry.”
Exploding off the car in a fierce rush, Zane stalked a few paces down the road before whirling to stare at her. “I’m not ashamed of crying. But my brother earned more than a few pointless tears from me. That’s not how he would have wanted to be remembered, and it’s not what he would have wanted for my life. He always wanted the best for me—he was an amazing older brother. I was damn lucky to have him for ten years. And for all the years I outlive him, I have his memory, and what he taught me.”
Felicity slid off the hood, her cheeks paler than the sand stretching down to the water. “What did he teach you?”
“Life is short.” The truth of Zane’s existence was a coal burning in his chest, lodged against his heart and impossible to remove. “No one can say how short, so you’d better
live
while you can. Every moment, every breath, could be your last. Never let an opportunity pass you by. And have fun. Because Michael will never get to do any of the things he dreamed about, the things we talked about late at night after lights out. So I do them for him. For both of us. That’s how I moved on.”
Something flickered in Felicity’s eyes, then she blinked and it was gone. “It’s strange, when you think about it. We both grew up under a cloud, overshadowed by dark events beyond our control. I responded by holding myself in check and trying to keep as much control as I can…and you let yourself go. You let yourself experience things to the fullest. You wring every drop of happiness you can out of life. I wish I could be more like that.”
“You can,” he promised her, meaning it with everything in him.
“I think…I’m ready to try. If you’ll help me.”
“Anything.” So many promises, when Zane had managed to make it through his entire life without ever promising anyone anything. But he couldn’t regret it when a slow, tremulous smile bloomed across Felicity’s face.
She leaned back on her elbows against the hood of the car, like a classic pinup girl in a fifties magazine. Crooking one slim finger, she tilted her chin up in invitation. Only the rapid rise and fall of her chest gave away her nerves.
“Come here,” Felicity said, all throaty and husky. “And help me experience life to the fullest.”
In three long strides, Zane was at her side. Her eyes were hot enough to sear his skin, and when he reached for her, she gasped at the hungry slide of his hands up the outsides of her silken thighs.
Clasping her slender waist, he marveled at the feel of her—delicate, fragile, yet somehow totally in control of her own power as a beautiful and desirable woman. It was addictive. Zane’s body throbbed, thick and heavy with the molten beat of his blood.
When Felicity boldly leaned up to grab hold of his collar and pulled him down to cover her, Zane grinned, wild and free. There was nothing on earth like watching Felicity Carlson come apart in his arms. Nothing he’d experienced before in his life of decadent pleasures even compared.
Zane sank into the
For the first time, Zane’s voice broke. Humiliating tears burned like acid behind his eyes, but he clenched his back teeth and got through it. “My brother got his hands under my arms and lifted me up, over his head, and somehow I got on top of the wave and rode it in toward shore a little ways. Enough that I could touch down. I turned to try and find Michael, to grab him and pull him in with me. But he was gone.”
Felicity’s fingers spasmed in his hold. “Zane, oh. Oh my God.”
It was a prayer, more than anything else—a prayer for mercy, for help, for something to ease the pain. But there was nothing. “My brother saved me. And in doing so, he lost his own life.”
Zane dashed the tears from his cheeks and scrubbed his hand over his face. In a choked voice, Felicity said, “Don’t. It’s okay to cry.”
Exploding off the car in a fierce rush, Zane stalked a few paces down the road before whirling to stare at her. “I’m not ashamed of crying. But my brother earned more than a few pointless tears from me. That’s not how he would have wanted to be remembered, and it’s not what he would have wanted for my life. He always wanted the best for me—he was an amazing older brother. I was damn lucky to have him for ten years. And for all the years I outlive him, I have his memory, and what he taught me.”
Felicity slid off the hood, her cheeks paler than the sand stretching down to the water. “What did he teach you?”
“Life is short.” The truth of Zane’s existence was a coal burning in his chest, lodged against his heart and impossible to remove. “No one can say how short, so you’d better
live
while you can. Every moment, every breath, could be your last. Never let an opportunity pass you by. And have fun. Because Michael will never get to do any of the things he dreamed about, the things we talked about late at night after lights out. So I do them for him. For both of us. That’s how I moved on.”
Something flickered in Felicity’s eyes, then she blinked and it was gone. “It’s strange, when you think about it. We both grew up under a cloud, overshadowed by dark events beyond our control. I responded by holding myself in check and trying to keep as much control as I can…and you let yourself go. You let yourself experience things to the fullest. You wring every drop of happiness you can out of life. I wish I could be more like that.”
“You can,” he promised her, meaning it with everything in him.
“I think…I’m ready to try. If you’ll help me.”
“Anything.” So many promises, when Zane had managed to make it through his entire life without ever promising anyone anything. But he couldn’t regret it when a slow, tremulous smile bloomed across Felicity’s face.
She leaned back on her elbows against the hood of the car, like a classic pinup girl in a fifties magazine. Crooking one slim finger, she tilted her chin up in invitation. Only the rapid rise and fall of her chest gave away her nerves.
“Come here,” Felicity said, all throaty and husky. “And help me experience life to the fullest.”
In three long strides, Zane was at her side. Her eyes were hot enough to sear his skin, and when he reached for her, she gasped at the hungry slide of his hands up the outsides of her silken thighs.
Clasping her slender waist, he marveled at the feel of her—delicate, fragile, yet somehow totally in control of her own power as a beautiful and desirable woman. It was addictive. Zane’s body throbbed, thick and heavy with the molten beat of his blood.
When Felicity boldly leaned up to grab hold of his collar and pulled him down to cover her, Zane grinned, wild and free. There was nothing on earth like watching Felicity Carlson come apart in his arms. Nothing he’d experienced before in his life of decadent pleasures even compared.
Zane sank into the
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