Boys for Beginners by Lil Chase Page B

on more make-up.
    I don’t know what colour lipstick to choose so I go for the brightest red that I have.
    It’s really, really red.
    Lastly I get the skin-coloured powder and use this fluffy brush to put it all over my face. The brush feels really nice and I get a little carried away.
    But I’ve messed up again! The skin-coloured stuff has gone all over the stuff I’ve already done. This gives me two options: take it all off and start at the beginning, or put more make-up over the top.
    I go for option B.
    Next problem: clothes.
    Like I said, I don’t have any skirts. I do have one dress, but it’s the one that I don’t want to talk about. And even if I did have a skirt, I wouldn’t wear it. My legs are so skinny they could be blown away by a slight draught. So instead I find a pair of Levi’s and a shirt to wear on top.
    One last look in the mirror and I take a deep breath. With the corners of the shirt I make a knot so that I’m showing my belly.
    More importantly, my belly-button.
    And now I’m here at the bus stop, three hours later, and everyone is looking at me wondering who I am and what the flan has happened to the real Gwynnie Lewis.
    â€˜You look so good.’ I can’t tell if Jenny’s being honest, or being nice. Or maybe neither.
    â€˜Hi, Jenny.’ I just about get the words out.
    â€˜Is this because of the lesson I gave you yesterday?’ She’s still speaking really loudly. ‘If you want, I’ll give you some more coaching after school, to teach you properly.’ She can see my worried look so she quickly adds, ‘Don’t get me wrong – you look fabulous! I’m just saying that it’s not easy when it’s your first try.’
    I hope no one can see how red I’m going under all this make-up.
    â€˜And why have you been hiding your divine little stomach under all those gross T-shirts and sports clothes?’
    â€˜Erm.’
    â€˜From what you’re wearing, I’m guessing you want me to get you into the BB Club,’ she stage-whispers. I nod. ‘I can get you in, no sweat. It is basically
my
club after all!’
    I don’t know if I feel like a supermodel or a five-year-old, but I let Jenny lead me over to the BB Club because I am totally out of my depth here and she is slap bang in the middle of her depth. The BB girls are standing in their usual space: leaning against the railings of Becket’s Park.
    I can see Charlie Notts up ahead and we have to pass him to get to the girls. I’m praying that we won’t have to talk to him, but Jenny makes sure that we do. ‘Heya, Charlie, look at Gwynnie. Don’t you think she just looks awesome?’
    I’ve got shooting pains all up and down my left arm: the first sign of a heart attack.
    Charlie says, ‘You look really nice, Gwynnie.’
    Charlie Notts thinks I look
really nice
. I actcompletely gracefully by replying, ‘Hwah, phnma, sllmp.’
    Jenny starts laughing at me, but not in a mean way, just in a kind of
isn’t my friend Gwynnie so silly sometimes?
way. ‘Oh, Gwynnie, you’re an absolute riot when you’re shy around boys!’
    Charlie says, ‘Gwynnie’s not shy around me, are you, Gwynnie?’
    â€˜Hsma, waa, ngag,’ I say, coherently.
    â€˜Besides,’ he says, ‘she has nothing to be shy about. She looks good.’
    Charlie Notts said that I look
good
! I don’t give a damn if this heart attack kills me, my life is complete. It couldn’t get better unless I was signed for Tottenham.
    â€˜She
does
look good, Charlie, you are right,’ says Jenny. ‘And I don’t care what anyone says, but over-applying the make-up is brave, and some people can even pull it off.’
    I was worried about the make-up, but Jenny is making this out to be a good thing.
    â€˜The critics might disagree, but size zero is still so in right now,’ she continues as if