Brothers In Law by Henry Cecil Page B

there.
    â€˜â€œVery well,” said the Recorder. “Choose whom you like,” and he pointed to the two rows of counsel sitting in Court. Some were very young, like me, and couldn’t have had any experience. Others were very old and moth-eaten. At least one had a hearing aid.
    â€˜â€œWhat!” said the old lag in horror. “One of those?”
    â€˜The Recorder looked at the two rows of counsel and then said rather mournfully: “Yes, I’m afraid so. That’s all we have in stock at the moment.”’
    â€˜Well,’ said Roger, ‘I wish you luck. But if you did get a brief, would you know what to do with it?’
    â€˜As much as anyone else, old boy. Just get up and spout to the jury. Can’t come to much harm. They’re all guilty. So it doesn’t really matter what happens. Feather in your cap if you get them off. Inevitable if they’re convicted.’
    â€˜I wonder they bother to try them,’ said Roger.
    â€˜Must go through the motions, old boy,’ said Peter. ‘And anyway, where would the legal profession be? Justice must not only be done but must appear to be done and, may I add, must be paid for being done. Bye, bye, old boy. Hope you like Mrs Biggs’ letters. Some of them are a bit hot. I tried a bit on one of my girlfriends. Went down very well. Breach of copyright, I suppose. But who cares? So long.’
    For the next hour Roger was left alone and he devoted himself to the study of Biggs (married woman) v Pieman . He found it enthralling – not so much in the way that Peter did, but because he felt so important to be looking into the intimate affairs of other people and, in particular, people of some prominence. Here he was, only just called to the Bar, and he knew things about a Member of Parliament which hardly anyone else knew. And then, supposing by one of those extraordinary coincidences that do take place, he happened to meet Mr Biggs! He might be a member of his uncle’s club. And suppose his uncle introduced him and they had dinner together. He’d have to listen while Biggs extolled the virtues of his wife.
    â€˜A sweet little woman, though I say it myself who shouldn’t,’ Mr Biggs might say.
    â€˜I don’t know whether you should or you shouldn’t,’ Roger would think to himself. ‘Fortunately you didn’t say good little woman.’ Mr Biggs would go on: ‘Pretty as a picture – but I’d trust her with anyone. It’s not everyone who can say that, these days.’
    â€˜Indeed not,’ Roger would think. ‘Not with accuracy, anyway.’
    At that moment, Mr Grimes came into the pupils’ room.
    â€˜How are ye, my dear fellow? What are ye looking at? Oh, dear, dear, dear. That kettle of fish. Well, the fellows will be fellows and the girls will be girls. They will do these things, they will do these things.’
    â€˜D’you think the action will come into Court?’
    â€˜Oh, dear me no, my dear fellow. We can’t have that, can we? Dear, dear, dear. Our husband doesn’t know of our goings on and we don’t want him to. We don’t want him to, my dear fellow.’
    â€˜Then why did she bring the action?’
    â€˜Just a try on, my dear fellow, just a try on. He might have paid up. You can never tell, my dear fellow, you can never tell. There’s only one motto I know of that’s any good. “Never go to law,” my dear fellow, “never go to law”. And then where should we be, my dear fellow? We shouldn’t, should we? So it’s just as well they will do these things, isn’t it, my dear fellow, just as well.’
    Then Alec came in.
    â€˜Can you see Mr Wince, sir? He was just passing and wanted to have a word with you about Cooling and Mallet.’
    Mr Grimes immediately left the pupils’ room. It was not far enough to run but he went as fast as he could. Roger imagined that he would be