Christmas Bells by Jennifer Chiaverini Page A

bad guy.”
    â€œNo, of course not, but I was really disappointed when—” Sophia sat back, cupped her hands around her coffee mug, and frowned into it.
    Lucas could not resist. “When what?”
    â€œWhen he said that the entire problem could have been avoided if they had just taken the precautionary measure of exchanging Christmas lists.”
    â€œPrecautionary measure?”
    â€œThat’s an exact quote. When I tried to explain that their gifts were a symbol of their profound love for each other, he got this panicked look on his face and asked me not to cut my hair, because he prefers it long.” She shook her head, and for a moment Lucas thought he glimpsed tears in her eyes. “Then, as we were leaving the store, he said that the wife came out ahead in the deal, because her hair would grow back, but the husband’s watch was long gone.”
    â€œSophia, I—” Lucas sat back in his chair, shaking his head. “I’m really sorry. I’m sorry he didn’t understand, but you shouldn’t feel stupid.”
    â€œAnd yet I do,” she said, forlorn. “To top it all off, we were so busy arguing that Brandon forgot to buy his mother’s present, so the entire trip was a waste of time.”
    â€œI’m sorry,” Lucas said again.
    â€œYou know something?” Sophia brushed her long hair away from her face and studied him. “Sometimes I wish Brandon could be more like you.”
    Pained, Lucas managed a shrug. “That’s not really fair to Brandon. It’s taken me years to achieve this level of awesomeness.”
    She smiled then, and he felt both rewarded and profoundly sad.
    It wasn’t until much later, after he had seen her home and had returned to his own apartment, strewn with his books and papers and maps and models, that his churning thoughts settled upon one irrefutable fact: He loved Sophia, and he was tired of her not knowing. He would never deliberately create a rift between her and Brandon, but evidently one already existed. Nothing prevented him from telling her the truth. Lucas would tell Sophia how he felt and let her decide if instead of wishing her boyfriend were more like him, she would choose him to be her boyfriend.
    His Christmas gift would speak for him, would say all he had been unable to say for far too long. He would buy Sophia a set of exquisite combs with jeweled rims, like those Jim had given Della in the story. Sophia would understand what it meant.
    It took some searching, but Lucas was determined, and two days before Christmas he found the perfect combs in a boutique on Brattle Street. On Christmas Eve he wrapped them carefully and wrote out a card, a simple message of love and friendship. Determined not to lose his nerve, he tucked the gift in his bag with his sheet music, dressed in his concert attire, and walked to St. Margaret’s, arriving a record thirty minutes early.
    He and Sophia always went out for dessert together after the Children’s Mass, after the singers and parishioners had departed, after they had cleaned up for the adult choir’s performance at Midnight Mass. They usually went to a favorite café to celebrate with coffee and pie and to exchange gifts, usually CDs or concert tickets or books. Once Sophia had given him a huge bucket ofLEGOs so he could construct a multitude of houses and cityscapes, take them apart, and rebuild anew. Anyone else would have considered it a gag gift, but not Sophia, and not Lucas. Whenever he grew frustrated with classes or work, he would pull out the little plastic bricks and build something impossible, something never before dreamt of, and afterward he would remember why he loved what he had chosen as his life’s work.
    Sophia’s gift was one of the best he had ever received. That year, he hoped to give her one as meaningful.
    His hopes ran so high on Christmas Eve that when Sophia took him aside before the concert and profusely