Color Blind (Able to Love) by Michelle Lindo-Rice Page A

caring, considerate father.”
    Saul paused. He’d felt that way about Nora. He swallowed. “I’m glad you have good things to say about your husband. I’m sorry Emily will grow up without a father.”
    “Do you mean that, Dad. Or, are you saying what you think I want to hear?”
 “When have you known me not to speak my mind? I know I didn’t approve of the marriage, but I didn’t want him dead.”
    He heard a great sigh. Then her arms surrounded his in a hug. “I shouldn’t have blamed you for his death. I know you tried to save us.”
    He choked up. “I did, honey. I tried to save all of you. You must believe that I wouldn’t want your daughter to grow up without a father in her life. That’s the last thing I would wish for anyone. I know what it’s like to lose a spouse so suddenly. It’s a shock to your system and you don’t know how you’ll ever recover. When I lost your mother, I felt that pain for years. I was in a dark place for quite some time. If it weren’t for you...”
    He felt Cassandra’s body heave with tears. “I miss Kellan so much. I put up a good front for Emily but every night I cry myself to sleep.”
    As she cried, her heartache ripped him to the core. He comforted her, glad that Emily was down for a nap and wouldn’t witness her mother’s breakdown.
    “It’s okay to cry, honey. Cry for as long as you have to,” he soothed. “It may be too late, but I will be here for you and Emily. I want to know her. I know I don’t deserve it but please give me that chance.”
     
     
    “I wish you could actually see her. She has your nose and sometimes your expressions. I swear it’s like I see you looking at me.”
    Saul touched her hair to make contact. “I can just imagine that. I know I’m blind, but I can see her, Cassie. I can hear her laughter. I can feel her joy.”
    Cassandra moved out of his arms. He heard her blowing her nose and reached over to give her another hug. He felt her tense up but was glad she didn’t pull away.
    “I can see that you’re changing and trying.” His daughter addressed him. “I would like us to continue to work on mending our relationship. I know I didn’t answer your calls or message and I’m sorry for that. I’ve been seeing a therapist and funny enough, she’d recommended I reach out to you.”
    He felt and heard movements. Cassandra had gotten up to go somewhere.
    Saul turned his head towards her when he heard her address him from the far corner of the room. “What’s going on with Annie?”
    “Nothing’s going on with Annie. She’s my therapist. Why does everyone think that?” he wondered aloud. Was he giving off some vibe around her?
    Like Macy, Cassandra seemed fixated on Annie. “If she’s just your therapist, then why were you holding hands when I opened the door?”
    His smile crumbled. “I was?” He racked his brain. He vaguely remembered reaching for Annie’s hand.
    “Yes, you were. Don’t pretend like you don’t remember. You like her, don’t you?” Cassandra asked.
    Saul grinned. He knew he sounded like a schoolboy. “Yes, I do. In fact, if I weren’t afraid of busting my butt, I would pull a Tom Cruise and hop on your couch like a raving maniac. That’s how good I’m feeling.”
    “What if she… wasn’t what you… expect, physically, I mean?”
    He didn’t miss her hesitation. Was there something about Annie that he didn’t know? “Is she ugly?” He didn’t care if he sounded flaky. He had a feeling his daughter was holding something from him. “No don’t tell me, she’s has a hideous birthmark?”
    “Would it matter?”
    Her curiosity was evident in her high-pitched squeal. He gave her question serious thought. Surprised, he answered, “No, I don’t think so. To me, she’s beautiful. She’s positive, she’s bubbly, and she’s forgiving. She has a hot temper to match, too.” Annie was no pushover and he loved that.
    “I know you’re adamant that she’s your therapist, but if I