benevolent act, and he had truly come to care about her children. He didn't want to see them reduced to poverty, or even worse, in a workhouse.
It bore thinking about.
Slowly, carefully, but worth thinking about.
Chapter Five
The days settled into a routine, and Lily let it be so. Her mind was too tangled to make plans or act on them.
She could never allow her children to sink into poverty.
She shouldn't trap Sir Benjamin in her scandal.
Wouldn't it be cruel to abandon him to his lonely life?
She shouldn't put her family's welfare above his.
In the mornings, she and her family ate breakfast in the schoolroom, with Charlotte and Michael fetching and carrying. After that, she taught them all according to their age, though Michael was already beyond her.
After a few days, he began to go down to Sir Benjamin for lessons. Lily suspected he'd asked and wasn't sure that was right, but Sir Benjamin could tutor him in Latin, Greek, and mathematics, which she could not.
In the afternoons, if the weather was at all clement, they all went out for long walks. They had balls and hoops found somewhere, which helped amuse. One day Sir Benjamin had come out with his two dogs, and that became part of the routine.
The dogs were amiable and delighted to chase after balls and sticks and so added to the play. Sir Benjamin often pointed out aspects of nature to the children -- the shape of a tree, the texture of bark, and the secret signs of shy animals. They were town-bred children, and much of it was wondrous to them.
One day he directed their attention to a tree. "Mistletoe. We should remember that for Christmas."
Lily saw Michael and Charlotte share a glance. Tommy asked the question. "Will we still be here at Christmas, sir?"
None of the children had addressed the question to her, but they must worry about it all the time.
"Yes," Sir Benjamin said. "Winter's no time to be wandering. Shall I show you the Yule log?"
They all agreed, delighted, and Lily followed swallowing tears.
He took them into some woodland to show them the large log. "Cut earlier to let it dry a bit. We'll bring it in on Christmas Eve to burn in the hall hearth."
"Will there be chestnuts, sir?" Charlotte asked.
"Of course."
"And sugar plums?" That was Susie, who loved sweet things.
"Definitely. And mince pies and wassail. Well, perhaps not for you children. But the mummers will come."
"And we'll hang mistletoe," Charlotte said, eyes bright. "Papa always kissed mama beneath the mistletoe."
"We'd best head back to the house," Lily said quickly, "and the dogs are looking bored. Tommy, throw the ball for them. Susie, see how far you can roll the hoop."
The dogs liked to chase that, too.
They liked to chase anything.
"Such simple creatures, dogs," she said as they headed back.
"Thus excellent companions," Sir Benjamin said, strolling beside her. "Don't worry that I might try to demand a kiss beneath the mistletoe."
She looked at him. "Why should I worry?"
He stared ahead. "My mouth, ma'am."
Oh, the poor man. Impulsively, Lily put a hand to his cheek, stretched up, and kissed him. He'd closed his lips as if in resistance, but that made it work reasonably well.
"There, see?" she said, looking into his eyes. "No worry at all."
He put his hand to her cheek and slowly, awkwardly, lowered his head to touch his lips to hers. Then he exhaled. "Thank you, ma'am."
All doubts fled. He needed this as much as she did. "Don't you think that after two kisses we should progress to first names, sir?"
"I make you free of Ben."
"And I you of Lily." She linked arms with him, and they went after the children. "This is much more comfortable, isn't it?"
"This is delightful," he said and halted. He turned to face her. "Mistress Gifford, Lily, will you marry me?"
Lily was frozen. She'd not expected this. Not yet. Not now.
She almost made a conventional demur, but knew from the look in his eyes that he was braced for rejection.
She smiled. "Yes, Ben, I will. And
It bore thinking about.
Slowly, carefully, but worth thinking about.
Chapter Five
The days settled into a routine, and Lily let it be so. Her mind was too tangled to make plans or act on them.
She could never allow her children to sink into poverty.
She shouldn't trap Sir Benjamin in her scandal.
Wouldn't it be cruel to abandon him to his lonely life?
She shouldn't put her family's welfare above his.
In the mornings, she and her family ate breakfast in the schoolroom, with Charlotte and Michael fetching and carrying. After that, she taught them all according to their age, though Michael was already beyond her.
After a few days, he began to go down to Sir Benjamin for lessons. Lily suspected he'd asked and wasn't sure that was right, but Sir Benjamin could tutor him in Latin, Greek, and mathematics, which she could not.
In the afternoons, if the weather was at all clement, they all went out for long walks. They had balls and hoops found somewhere, which helped amuse. One day Sir Benjamin had come out with his two dogs, and that became part of the routine.
The dogs were amiable and delighted to chase after balls and sticks and so added to the play. Sir Benjamin often pointed out aspects of nature to the children -- the shape of a tree, the texture of bark, and the secret signs of shy animals. They were town-bred children, and much of it was wondrous to them.
One day he directed their attention to a tree. "Mistletoe. We should remember that for Christmas."
Lily saw Michael and Charlotte share a glance. Tommy asked the question. "Will we still be here at Christmas, sir?"
None of the children had addressed the question to her, but they must worry about it all the time.
"Yes," Sir Benjamin said. "Winter's no time to be wandering. Shall I show you the Yule log?"
They all agreed, delighted, and Lily followed swallowing tears.
He took them into some woodland to show them the large log. "Cut earlier to let it dry a bit. We'll bring it in on Christmas Eve to burn in the hall hearth."
"Will there be chestnuts, sir?" Charlotte asked.
"Of course."
"And sugar plums?" That was Susie, who loved sweet things.
"Definitely. And mince pies and wassail. Well, perhaps not for you children. But the mummers will come."
"And we'll hang mistletoe," Charlotte said, eyes bright. "Papa always kissed mama beneath the mistletoe."
"We'd best head back to the house," Lily said quickly, "and the dogs are looking bored. Tommy, throw the ball for them. Susie, see how far you can roll the hoop."
The dogs liked to chase that, too.
They liked to chase anything.
"Such simple creatures, dogs," she said as they headed back.
"Thus excellent companions," Sir Benjamin said, strolling beside her. "Don't worry that I might try to demand a kiss beneath the mistletoe."
She looked at him. "Why should I worry?"
He stared ahead. "My mouth, ma'am."
Oh, the poor man. Impulsively, Lily put a hand to his cheek, stretched up, and kissed him. He'd closed his lips as if in resistance, but that made it work reasonably well.
"There, see?" she said, looking into his eyes. "No worry at all."
He put his hand to her cheek and slowly, awkwardly, lowered his head to touch his lips to hers. Then he exhaled. "Thank you, ma'am."
All doubts fled. He needed this as much as she did. "Don't you think that after two kisses we should progress to first names, sir?"
"I make you free of Ben."
"And I you of Lily." She linked arms with him, and they went after the children. "This is much more comfortable, isn't it?"
"This is delightful," he said and halted. He turned to face her. "Mistress Gifford, Lily, will you marry me?"
Lily was frozen. She'd not expected this. Not yet. Not now.
She almost made a conventional demur, but knew from the look in his eyes that he was braced for rejection.
She smiled. "Yes, Ben, I will. And
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