to see grandma and grandpa. Mom had to help grandpa repair part of the chicken coop in the backyard. It was hot that day and I couldn’t stand the heat, so I stayed inside with the air-conditioning.” I pause, remembering each room had its own unit to keep the small three-bedroom home cool from the Florida summer heat. After taking another deep breath, I continue.
“My mom is the oldest of three; mom’s sister, who is eleven years younger, was out at the time. Mom’s brother, who actually lived with my parents before I was born , was fourteen years younger than mom was. Grandma had gotten really sick, and with grandpa working so much, they couldn’t care for him. He stayed with my parents until grandma got better.
Before we arrived that afternoon, grandma had run to the store to pick up what she needed to make supper. Grandpa’s small black and white TV was in the family room, and I remember watching some show or other. My uncle was home. He came out of his room, excited about something my grandpa had just gotten him; he was dying to show it to me. My sister was outside helping mom and grandpa. I was alone. He persuaded me to come see what it was, and when I walked into his room, he shut the door behind me and locked it. I asked him why he had to lock it. He told me he wanted to show only one person at a time and my sister could be next. I didn’t think anything about it. He pulled out his new G. I. Joe toy. He was excited to get this particular one. He told me I could hold it if I let him tickle me. I didn’t like being tickled but I didn’t care. So I let him.” I stop to take another breath. I feel lightheaded and I’m not sure I can continue. Caine rubs my hand , helping me to concentrate on getting through what I need to tell him. “When he began tickling me, he straddled my body and handed me the toy. He... uh, began moving his fingers around while he was describing all the cool things about it. I wasn’t too impressed by his new toy, but I was happy that he was. Grandma and grandpa didn’t have a lot of money, so getting a new toy was a huge deal. My uncle then took it away from me and said the figure wanted to feel what it was like to tickle me. I thought he was crazy, but I trusted him because he was my uncle. He was family.” The tears are rapidly running down my cheeks, and I’m having a hard time breathing.
“My uncle did something that he shouldn’t have; he touched me places he shouldn’t have and did things to me that an eight-year-old has no business having done to them. He hurt me.” Caine pulls me into him. I’m sobbing uncontrollably in a fucking parking lot. “My uncle took away my childhood that afternoon. I was too scared to tell my mom. He made me promise not to tell, saying I would get in a lot of trouble. He told me my mom wouldn’t want me anymore if she found out. I remember once I got back to my house, I cried into my pillow for what seemed like forever. Each time mom needed to go to grandpa’s house after that, I tried to come up with an excuse so that I didn’t have to go. Most of the time it worked, but when mom forced me to go with her, I prayed the entire ride that my uncle wouldn’t be there. I prayed so hard that I sometimes made myself sick. I can’t remember how many times my uncle touched and made me do awful things; I’ve blocked a lot of details out of my head. It’s been hard getting past. It screwed me up so much that I had to repeat the third grade because I had missed so many days of school from being ‘sick’. My mom took me to the doctor who referred us to a counselor. The therapist gave her the thumbs up that I was fine. He was a quack if I’ve ever seen one.”
“But you said you were a virgin. Does that mean, he ... he didn’t...” Caine can’t even finish his thought.
“No, he never penetrated me. He had me do a number of other horrible things. Sometimes I wonder if he had just demanded sex, maybe it would have been easier. I’m sure
“My mom is the oldest of three; mom’s sister, who is eleven years younger, was out at the time. Mom’s brother, who actually lived with my parents before I was born , was fourteen years younger than mom was. Grandma had gotten really sick, and with grandpa working so much, they couldn’t care for him. He stayed with my parents until grandma got better.
Before we arrived that afternoon, grandma had run to the store to pick up what she needed to make supper. Grandpa’s small black and white TV was in the family room, and I remember watching some show or other. My uncle was home. He came out of his room, excited about something my grandpa had just gotten him; he was dying to show it to me. My sister was outside helping mom and grandpa. I was alone. He persuaded me to come see what it was, and when I walked into his room, he shut the door behind me and locked it. I asked him why he had to lock it. He told me he wanted to show only one person at a time and my sister could be next. I didn’t think anything about it. He pulled out his new G. I. Joe toy. He was excited to get this particular one. He told me I could hold it if I let him tickle me. I didn’t like being tickled but I didn’t care. So I let him.” I stop to take another breath. I feel lightheaded and I’m not sure I can continue. Caine rubs my hand , helping me to concentrate on getting through what I need to tell him. “When he began tickling me, he straddled my body and handed me the toy. He... uh, began moving his fingers around while he was describing all the cool things about it. I wasn’t too impressed by his new toy, but I was happy that he was. Grandma and grandpa didn’t have a lot of money, so getting a new toy was a huge deal. My uncle then took it away from me and said the figure wanted to feel what it was like to tickle me. I thought he was crazy, but I trusted him because he was my uncle. He was family.” The tears are rapidly running down my cheeks, and I’m having a hard time breathing.
“My uncle did something that he shouldn’t have; he touched me places he shouldn’t have and did things to me that an eight-year-old has no business having done to them. He hurt me.” Caine pulls me into him. I’m sobbing uncontrollably in a fucking parking lot. “My uncle took away my childhood that afternoon. I was too scared to tell my mom. He made me promise not to tell, saying I would get in a lot of trouble. He told me my mom wouldn’t want me anymore if she found out. I remember once I got back to my house, I cried into my pillow for what seemed like forever. Each time mom needed to go to grandpa’s house after that, I tried to come up with an excuse so that I didn’t have to go. Most of the time it worked, but when mom forced me to go with her, I prayed the entire ride that my uncle wouldn’t be there. I prayed so hard that I sometimes made myself sick. I can’t remember how many times my uncle touched and made me do awful things; I’ve blocked a lot of details out of my head. It’s been hard getting past. It screwed me up so much that I had to repeat the third grade because I had missed so many days of school from being ‘sick’. My mom took me to the doctor who referred us to a counselor. The therapist gave her the thumbs up that I was fine. He was a quack if I’ve ever seen one.”
“But you said you were a virgin. Does that mean, he ... he didn’t...” Caine can’t even finish his thought.
“No, he never penetrated me. He had me do a number of other horrible things. Sometimes I wonder if he had just demanded sex, maybe it would have been easier. I’m sure
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