Devil's Despair Box Set: Books 1-3 by A.C. Bextor Page A

looking for a good time and enjoying a table to themselves, don’t stand a chance against Hayden’s charm. He convinces them to go to the bar and wait for him there. Whether he makes true on this commitment, no one will ever know. Not my business, and I don’t care either way, but I’m glad to take a load off.
    The waitress, Shelby, brings us our usual rounds and leaves us to it. There’s no live band tonight so we’re able to hear ourselves without interruption.
    Toby starts. “So, Ace. You’re better this time after coming back from Ohio, I can tell.”
    Hayden concurs before taking a pull from his beer. “I noticed as well, man. Good for you.”
    Travis says nothing.
    “It’ll take some time, but it’s good to be home.”
    Lowering his voice and in a serious tone, but meant for all of them to hear, Toby prods. “But… you still miss her.”
    “Yeah. I do.”
    Sadey.
    Toby continues. “It’s not my business, so don’t take this the wrong way.” I nod compliantly, giving him unspoken permission to keep going. “I never met Sadey. I’ve heard about her, from you of course, but never met her. I’m not so uncertain you don’t have the same feelings for Raegan that you did for her. Just an observation, don’t get pissed.”
    “They’re two different people, Toby. Two completely different people.”
    “Doesn’t mean they both don’t deserve what you have to offer, if you’re willing to offer that to Raegan. I saw the way she looked at you last night, Ace.”
    “I’m not over Sadey.”
    Hayden speaks on the subject, which is odd because he, of all people, has zero experience when it comes to relationships. “You won’t be over her until you let so much as the idea of someone else in.” Then, coming back to his former self, he offers, “She’s smokin’ hot, though. Gotta give her kudos for that. When we were on stage, before that asshole touched her, there wasn’t a man within distance that didn’t feel her presence, and they were feeling it hard , if ya know what I’m saying.”
    Again, Travis says nothing. I can’t read his expression. I don’t know his true intent with Cherry and it pisses me off.
    Picking up my beer, swallowing the last of it, and setting it down with a heavy hand, I explain my exit. “I’m goin’ home.” Then reiterate to Travis again. “Cherry gets up late. She doesn’t like mornings with me and Sarah. I’ll tell her you’ll pick her up at noon. Take care of her for me, Trav. I’m serious.”
    He nods but doesn’t offer a verbal response.
    Enough of this.
    * * *
    It’s midnight. After driving around town for a couple of hours, I admit I’m stalling to be sure Cherry’s asleep before heading home. Here I am now, sitting in my truck, looking at a picture of Sadey I’ve kept with me for as long as I’ve known her. She’s standing at the bar back at the Peril clubhouse last year with Hem, Shame, and Mace – her family.
    I need to let her go, but how? It’s like an unrestrained pain centered in my chest and instead of fighting it, I cling to it like a cloak. I’m wrapped in its darkness, endearing it to me, as I struggle to hold onto her.
    Sadey can only ever be a memory .
    I can’t go back and get her. I can’t call her just to hear her voice. I can’t hold her, touch her, and kiss her. Fuck, I also can’t let her go .
    After leaving the guys at The Ward and reliving every piece of advice they tried to offer, I needed time to process their words without being in the presence of Cherry. Parts of me believe they’re right; being completely honest, I know they are. Leaving Sadey Bug this last time killed me. A part of me truly died, pieces of my love for her shattering with every passing mile. It doesn’t make me miss her any less, but the end-game results have been tallied and announced: I lost. I’ve got to find a way to say goodbye.
    The guys were right, to an extent, of Cherry’s feelings for me. I just hadn’t been aware that the others could