was his reasoning, but so many years without acknowledging them was making me lose all of the memories. I didn’t want to lose them forever. After looking back over my journal I realized that the times that I blocked out were important to me, and it was like these past fourteen years had given me amnesia.
Seeing the journal and talking like a friend with Sketch made me think that I could revisit the past. That maybe I was strong enough, or at least stronger that I was all those years ago. So that’s what I did. I sat down with my journal and my nails, and engrossed myself in the words that I’d forgotten.
The entry from my first night here was the worst one.
-I don’t know what day it is, but I know my parents are dead. The man with the long beard and snake tattoo was the one that did it. From the crack in my parent’s closet door, I saw the man stab my father in the chest several times. Then he cut my mom’s neck and I watched her fall to the floor. My dad told the man that they were the only ones home when he asked where I was. Dad told him that I was at a friend’s house.
I listened as they tore through the house making sure that he wasn’t lying. He screamed, “Where is she?”
I hid away in their closet and was very quiet. The only reason that I was in their bed that night was because I had a nightmare. If I didn’t, then I would have been sleeping in my bed, and they would have killed me too. When the bad man broke in the house, my dad told me to get inside the closet and to not make a sound. So that was what I did. I wish I‘d shut the door all the way, because through the small crack I watched the snake man kill them. He took my parents.
I don’t know who that man was, but my father did. He called him Jim. Several times I heard him call out that name. He said, “Why are you doing this, Jake?”
When Max found me in the closet a day or so later, I told him that somebody named Jake did this. He hugged me tight and told me that he would keep me safe. He said I would always be safe with him, and I believe him. He wouldn’t hurt me. My father was his best friend. He’d keep me safe from that bad man.
His words didn’t make the pain go away, just helped a little. It still hurt. My heart was breaking. Max said that it would go away soon, but it doesn’t feel like it. Something inside me feels missing, and I don’t have anyone to talk to.
I hadn’t seen my only friend Cora in weeks. Her mom and my mom were best friends. She used to come over to my house a lot. I could use a hug from her right now, but Max says it’s not safe for me to go anywhere outside the walls of this house. He’s even letting me sleep in the floor beside his bed. He’s nice to me.
I hope they catch whoever did this. He’s evil. He took away everything I love.
I have to quit writing now, because I’m too sad. I just want to sleep away the bad thoughts. I’ll write again soon.
Goodnight Journal. Love Sadie.
I read that journal entry three times while Max was away. Each time I’d hoped that it would’ve gotten easier, but it never did.
I had forgotten about my friend Cora, and wondered where she was now. She was the only friend I ever had. I bet she had an amazing life now. She’s not fucked up like me.
I glanced at the clock and it was just past five a.m., and time for me to get up and get busy. Max would be home soon.
Last night in the midst of my wallowing I decided that I would plan a special birthday party for him. His birthday was next week. He always did special things for me on my birthday, and I wanted to repay him. The journal made me realize that he’d kept me safe for so long. He’d fed me, clothed me, and only asked for cooperation in return. It would be nice to do something good for him.
Seeing the journal and talking like a friend with Sketch made me think that I could revisit the past. That maybe I was strong enough, or at least stronger that I was all those years ago. So that’s what I did. I sat down with my journal and my nails, and engrossed myself in the words that I’d forgotten.
The entry from my first night here was the worst one.
-I don’t know what day it is, but I know my parents are dead. The man with the long beard and snake tattoo was the one that did it. From the crack in my parent’s closet door, I saw the man stab my father in the chest several times. Then he cut my mom’s neck and I watched her fall to the floor. My dad told the man that they were the only ones home when he asked where I was. Dad told him that I was at a friend’s house.
I listened as they tore through the house making sure that he wasn’t lying. He screamed, “Where is she?”
I hid away in their closet and was very quiet. The only reason that I was in their bed that night was because I had a nightmare. If I didn’t, then I would have been sleeping in my bed, and they would have killed me too. When the bad man broke in the house, my dad told me to get inside the closet and to not make a sound. So that was what I did. I wish I‘d shut the door all the way, because through the small crack I watched the snake man kill them. He took my parents.
I don’t know who that man was, but my father did. He called him Jim. Several times I heard him call out that name. He said, “Why are you doing this, Jake?”
When Max found me in the closet a day or so later, I told him that somebody named Jake did this. He hugged me tight and told me that he would keep me safe. He said I would always be safe with him, and I believe him. He wouldn’t hurt me. My father was his best friend. He’d keep me safe from that bad man.
His words didn’t make the pain go away, just helped a little. It still hurt. My heart was breaking. Max said that it would go away soon, but it doesn’t feel like it. Something inside me feels missing, and I don’t have anyone to talk to.
I hadn’t seen my only friend Cora in weeks. Her mom and my mom were best friends. She used to come over to my house a lot. I could use a hug from her right now, but Max says it’s not safe for me to go anywhere outside the walls of this house. He’s even letting me sleep in the floor beside his bed. He’s nice to me.
I hope they catch whoever did this. He’s evil. He took away everything I love.
I have to quit writing now, because I’m too sad. I just want to sleep away the bad thoughts. I’ll write again soon.
Goodnight Journal. Love Sadie.
I read that journal entry three times while Max was away. Each time I’d hoped that it would’ve gotten easier, but it never did.
I had forgotten about my friend Cora, and wondered where she was now. She was the only friend I ever had. I bet she had an amazing life now. She’s not fucked up like me.
I glanced at the clock and it was just past five a.m., and time for me to get up and get busy. Max would be home soon.
Last night in the midst of my wallowing I decided that I would plan a special birthday party for him. His birthday was next week. He always did special things for me on my birthday, and I wanted to repay him. The journal made me realize that he’d kept me safe for so long. He’d fed me, clothed me, and only asked for cooperation in return. It would be nice to do something good for him.
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