live without it. Nobody has to look at me if they don’t want to.
“It was one morning we hadn’t even been out. It had been raining all night, was still raining. Monsoons had set in. They called for us to fall out. We’d all been drinking beer. That’s where I started drinking. I’d never even had a beer when I went in. We were all about half drunk that morning. An army patrol had been hit about two miles west of us. I think they’d killed five or six of ours. They’d done medevaced everybody out and called artillery in on it, but they wanted us to go check it out. Get a body count if there was one. We had this little chickenshit second lieutenant just out of Quantico they’d give us, he was raring to go.
“He just had got there. He was running around, raising hell, cussing, trying to get us ready to go. Took us about an hour to get over there. Mud everywhere you walked. And I was toting that machine gun. I was tired and ready to sit down. Finally we got over there. They’d done blowed everything all to shit. This one little area we were in, there was just a couple of little trees left standing. That was it. They had some leaves up in the top of them but we didn’t think anything about it. Hell, they’d blowed craters in the ground big as swimming pools. And we found a couple of people. Found two or three, parts of a couplemore. You couldn’t tell how many. The lieutenant was trying to get everybody to pile it all together so he could get a body count. Crazy sumbitch. I don’t know why they didn’t shoot his ass.
“Hell, maybe it was because I was the machinegunner. Maybe they wanted to kill the firepower first. That’s a good tactic. I was sitting down smoking a cigarette on the bank of this little creek. I guess it was a rocket grenade but I never did find out for sure. It hit about twenty, thirty feet in front of me. I think I had my head down, taking a drag. I guess that saved me from being killed, catching a piece in the throat or something. But I always wore a flak jacket. It seemed like it went off in my face. And I knew I was hurt pretty bad. But I got up. Had blood all over me. Running off my chin, handfuls of it. I felt of my face. It was all tore up. I could touch some bone. I started walking over to this boy I knew and it was like somebody hit me with his fist in the top of the head. Sniper. That was it. I remember it happening. I just don’t remember anything after it. Not until I woke up in the hospital. That was four weeks later. In the Philippines. Subic Bay. They discharged me after that. Medical. One guy said they couldn’t operate, that the bullet went in too deep. Another one said he might could get it out, that it’s in three pieces. But he said it might leave me mute. Unable to talk. It’s scar tissue in there too. Causes these seizures. So every once in a while, I just pass out. I might go six months without it happening. It has hit me twice inone day. Sometimes there’s a warning to it and sometimes it ain’t. Sometimes it just happens.
“I don’t know what happened this time. I was with a girl. A young lady. I’d just met her a day or two before. We were in a car.
“She’s like me, she’s not … normal. But she was good to me. She could stand me. But I don’t know what happened. I don’t know where she is now. I don’t know where anybody is. I’ve got to get out of here.”
H e was talking, I didn’t want to interrupt him. I told him I had somebody to take care of me. Didn’t want to tell him who it was yet. Thought I’d just let him see her. Cause she’s fine. Finest thing in this place.
Naw but I was thinking about what it must have been like for him, face full of shrapnel one second and a bullet in the head the next. And coming home to a mama whose boy ain’t got his own face no more. Not knowing when he was gonna fall. Said while ago I’d seen every kind of man and injury there was come in here.
Hadn’t seen nobody like him.
I didn’t care for
“It was one morning we hadn’t even been out. It had been raining all night, was still raining. Monsoons had set in. They called for us to fall out. We’d all been drinking beer. That’s where I started drinking. I’d never even had a beer when I went in. We were all about half drunk that morning. An army patrol had been hit about two miles west of us. I think they’d killed five or six of ours. They’d done medevaced everybody out and called artillery in on it, but they wanted us to go check it out. Get a body count if there was one. We had this little chickenshit second lieutenant just out of Quantico they’d give us, he was raring to go.
“He just had got there. He was running around, raising hell, cussing, trying to get us ready to go. Took us about an hour to get over there. Mud everywhere you walked. And I was toting that machine gun. I was tired and ready to sit down. Finally we got over there. They’d done blowed everything all to shit. This one little area we were in, there was just a couple of little trees left standing. That was it. They had some leaves up in the top of them but we didn’t think anything about it. Hell, they’d blowed craters in the ground big as swimming pools. And we found a couple of people. Found two or three, parts of a couplemore. You couldn’t tell how many. The lieutenant was trying to get everybody to pile it all together so he could get a body count. Crazy sumbitch. I don’t know why they didn’t shoot his ass.
“Hell, maybe it was because I was the machinegunner. Maybe they wanted to kill the firepower first. That’s a good tactic. I was sitting down smoking a cigarette on the bank of this little creek. I guess it was a rocket grenade but I never did find out for sure. It hit about twenty, thirty feet in front of me. I think I had my head down, taking a drag. I guess that saved me from being killed, catching a piece in the throat or something. But I always wore a flak jacket. It seemed like it went off in my face. And I knew I was hurt pretty bad. But I got up. Had blood all over me. Running off my chin, handfuls of it. I felt of my face. It was all tore up. I could touch some bone. I started walking over to this boy I knew and it was like somebody hit me with his fist in the top of the head. Sniper. That was it. I remember it happening. I just don’t remember anything after it. Not until I woke up in the hospital. That was four weeks later. In the Philippines. Subic Bay. They discharged me after that. Medical. One guy said they couldn’t operate, that the bullet went in too deep. Another one said he might could get it out, that it’s in three pieces. But he said it might leave me mute. Unable to talk. It’s scar tissue in there too. Causes these seizures. So every once in a while, I just pass out. I might go six months without it happening. It has hit me twice inone day. Sometimes there’s a warning to it and sometimes it ain’t. Sometimes it just happens.
“I don’t know what happened this time. I was with a girl. A young lady. I’d just met her a day or two before. We were in a car.
“She’s like me, she’s not … normal. But she was good to me. She could stand me. But I don’t know what happened. I don’t know where she is now. I don’t know where anybody is. I’ve got to get out of here.”
H e was talking, I didn’t want to interrupt him. I told him I had somebody to take care of me. Didn’t want to tell him who it was yet. Thought I’d just let him see her. Cause she’s fine. Finest thing in this place.
Naw but I was thinking about what it must have been like for him, face full of shrapnel one second and a bullet in the head the next. And coming home to a mama whose boy ain’t got his own face no more. Not knowing when he was gonna fall. Said while ago I’d seen every kind of man and injury there was come in here.
Hadn’t seen nobody like him.
I didn’t care for
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