you should see a general practitioner.
L EONORA. My condition isn’t in the least distressing. It’s most interesting. Exhilarating. I feel like the first woman who’s ever been born. I feel I’ve discovered the world.
ANNIE. I know exactly how you feel, Leonora. I’ve never felt otherwise myself. Only I couldn’t put it into words.
L EONORA. Beware of religious mania, Annie. There are eyes upon you. They might disapprove of religious mania.
ANNIE. Well, of course, Leonora, I am a very religious type. That is something that very few people understand about me.
C HARLIE. Annie, be careful what you say. I think it highly possible that Leonora’s posing as an object of pity simply to see how we react. We’ve got our eyes on you, Leonora. (Exit.)
L EONORA. I think I ought to go away. I’ve played on Charlie’s nerves.
CATHERINE. He would be far more worried if you left.
A NNIE. He would think you weren’t going to leave your money to Daphne.
D APHNE. That’s unfair to my father, Annie.
L EONORA. It isn’t unflattering to him as a father.
CATHERINE. We would feel terribly guilty if you left just now, Leonora. — As if we’d failed you after all these years.
A NNIE (goes through French windows). It’s going to be marvellous on the canal this afternoon.
CATHERINE. Daphne, why don’t you go out on the boat with Annie? You look moony.
D APHNE. No, I couldn’t possibly. I feel sick. Besides, I’ve nothing suitable to wear in a boat with Annie. (Exit.)
LEONORA follows ANNIE on to terrace.
Light fades on CATHERINE.
Light up on ANNIE and LEONORA on terrace obliquely facing c anal.
A NNIE. I think you came through that ordeal magnificently.
L EONORA. Yes, I saved a certain amount of face.
A NNIE. It was quite a drama, Leonora.
L EONORA. Saving face is essentially a dramatic instinct for those who insist on playing heroic parts.
A NNIE. But you are a heroine. They were quite unprepared for you. So was I, of course, but then I’m always prepared for things I’m unprepared for. Whatever will you do next?
L EONORA. It will have to be something suitably dramatic, won’t it?
A NNIE. Let me see. You mustn’t, of course, go near a psychiatrist, unless you were thinking of eloping with him. But they aren’t satisfactory. One can’t lean on them when it comes to the leaning point. In my experience —well, I say no more, but take it from me they aren’t any good. You couldn’t elope with Charlie, I suppose?
L EONORA. Charlie hasn’t proved responsive to my overtures, Annie.
A NNIE. I quite agree. There is no chivalrous spirit in Charlie. What about eloping with Daphne’s boy friend? He doted on you, obviously, at first sight, although of course he said little.
L EONORA. Young Charlie had better stick to Daphne. She’s pregnant.
A NNIE. She isn’t!
L EONORA. She is.
A NNIE. How thrilling! Who told you?
L EONORA. The symptoms told me.
A NNIE. Do they know?
L EONORA. Not yet.
A NNIE. I never thought young Charlie had it in him. I suppose he is the man?
L EONORA. I think so. The symptoms tell me he is.
A NNIE. Well, you certainly can’t elope with him.
L EONORA. I had better disappear.
A NNIE. It wouldn’t be dramatic enough. They wouldn’t know what had happened to you, and it would all be a worry and a mess.
L EONORA. I have thought of a dramatic way. Imagine Catherine, Charlie and Daphne sitting out here on the terrace after dinner. (Pointing to chairs.) Catherine, Charlie, Daphne. It’s just gone nine, not quite dark yet. Mrs. S. has gone home. They are discussing what to do about Leonora. Daphne says Leonora must see a psychiatrist. Catherine says yes, but how can we make her see that? Charlie says, the woman is going through the menopause, it’s obvious. Catherine says yes, but what do we do about it — Can you envisage the scene, Annie?
A NNIE. Yes, and Daphne keeps saying a psychiatrist.
L EONORA. The girl has to say things like that at a time like this. — Well, while
L EONORA. My condition isn’t in the least distressing. It’s most interesting. Exhilarating. I feel like the first woman who’s ever been born. I feel I’ve discovered the world.
ANNIE. I know exactly how you feel, Leonora. I’ve never felt otherwise myself. Only I couldn’t put it into words.
L EONORA. Beware of religious mania, Annie. There are eyes upon you. They might disapprove of religious mania.
ANNIE. Well, of course, Leonora, I am a very religious type. That is something that very few people understand about me.
C HARLIE. Annie, be careful what you say. I think it highly possible that Leonora’s posing as an object of pity simply to see how we react. We’ve got our eyes on you, Leonora. (Exit.)
L EONORA. I think I ought to go away. I’ve played on Charlie’s nerves.
CATHERINE. He would be far more worried if you left.
A NNIE. He would think you weren’t going to leave your money to Daphne.
D APHNE. That’s unfair to my father, Annie.
L EONORA. It isn’t unflattering to him as a father.
CATHERINE. We would feel terribly guilty if you left just now, Leonora. — As if we’d failed you after all these years.
A NNIE (goes through French windows). It’s going to be marvellous on the canal this afternoon.
CATHERINE. Daphne, why don’t you go out on the boat with Annie? You look moony.
D APHNE. No, I couldn’t possibly. I feel sick. Besides, I’ve nothing suitable to wear in a boat with Annie. (Exit.)
LEONORA follows ANNIE on to terrace.
Light fades on CATHERINE.
Light up on ANNIE and LEONORA on terrace obliquely facing c anal.
A NNIE. I think you came through that ordeal magnificently.
L EONORA. Yes, I saved a certain amount of face.
A NNIE. It was quite a drama, Leonora.
L EONORA. Saving face is essentially a dramatic instinct for those who insist on playing heroic parts.
A NNIE. But you are a heroine. They were quite unprepared for you. So was I, of course, but then I’m always prepared for things I’m unprepared for. Whatever will you do next?
L EONORA. It will have to be something suitably dramatic, won’t it?
A NNIE. Let me see. You mustn’t, of course, go near a psychiatrist, unless you were thinking of eloping with him. But they aren’t satisfactory. One can’t lean on them when it comes to the leaning point. In my experience —well, I say no more, but take it from me they aren’t any good. You couldn’t elope with Charlie, I suppose?
L EONORA. Charlie hasn’t proved responsive to my overtures, Annie.
A NNIE. I quite agree. There is no chivalrous spirit in Charlie. What about eloping with Daphne’s boy friend? He doted on you, obviously, at first sight, although of course he said little.
L EONORA. Young Charlie had better stick to Daphne. She’s pregnant.
A NNIE. She isn’t!
L EONORA. She is.
A NNIE. How thrilling! Who told you?
L EONORA. The symptoms told me.
A NNIE. Do they know?
L EONORA. Not yet.
A NNIE. I never thought young Charlie had it in him. I suppose he is the man?
L EONORA. I think so. The symptoms tell me he is.
A NNIE. Well, you certainly can’t elope with him.
L EONORA. I had better disappear.
A NNIE. It wouldn’t be dramatic enough. They wouldn’t know what had happened to you, and it would all be a worry and a mess.
L EONORA. I have thought of a dramatic way. Imagine Catherine, Charlie and Daphne sitting out here on the terrace after dinner. (Pointing to chairs.) Catherine, Charlie, Daphne. It’s just gone nine, not quite dark yet. Mrs. S. has gone home. They are discussing what to do about Leonora. Daphne says Leonora must see a psychiatrist. Catherine says yes, but how can we make her see that? Charlie says, the woman is going through the menopause, it’s obvious. Catherine says yes, but what do we do about it — Can you envisage the scene, Annie?
A NNIE. Yes, and Daphne keeps saying a psychiatrist.
L EONORA. The girl has to say things like that at a time like this. — Well, while
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