strong within her,
and holds her breath to hear
the no-name girl
named and claimed
as the Lady speaks out loud
the choice of the gods.
‘Nasta,’ says the Lady
and shows the mark
of a swimming fish.
Nasta, the eighth girl,
daughter of fishers,
chosen by the gods,
holds herself proud,
salutes the Lady.
Her mother wipes a tear;
Nasta turns
and spits at Aissa.
5
DRAGONFLY BANISHED
The kitchen garden sprawls between the Hall and the houses of the inner town. Its back wall is the solid rock of the mountain. Nothing grows against it, but it’s a good place to dump garbage. Aissa dumped dog droppings onto the pile this morning, and the lottery’s name shards will end up there too.
That’s where mine belongs! Aissa thinks bitterly. Buried in filth .
There are also piles of compost: rotting kitchen scraps, weeds and manure from the dovecotes. The waste shrinks as it turns into rich soil ready to dig into the garden. The three oldest heaps have shrunk so much there’s a gap between them and the cliff – a big enough space for Aissa to crawl through and hide. But she can’t hide from the voices in her own mind, and those are even crueller than the jeers and curses of the audience.
How did I dare?
I wish I’d never learned my name.
It’s a punishment for trespassing into the Lady’s bathroom.
Milli-Cat pushed me out there as if she knew. Is she laughing too?
She can’t bear to think of her only friend betraying her. It’s nearly as bad as wondering what’s going to happen next. Because she knows that Half-One and Half-Two, and every other servant right up to old Squint-Eye, will punish her for standing up as if she were a twelve-year-old girl like any other. She just doesn’t know what the punishment will be.
She waits till dark before she creeps into the servants’ kitchen. The floor is already covered with sleeping bodies, and she’s not brave enough to pick her way across them to find her cloak. She curls up on the bare stones just inside the door, where she can get out before anyone sees her.
But her stubborn name whispers around her head as she sleeps, and she dreams of dragonflies.
She wakes to the hiss of whispers. Swift as an eagle plummeting onto a rabbit, Aissa crashes from her dream into her body.
The kitchen is grey with the first light of dawn. The whispers get louder, like a venom-filled hiss. She huddles on the floor while the poisonous words flood over her.
‘She’s worse than cursed – she’s a demon!’
‘It’s the gods’ answer for letting her attempt the lottery.’
‘She should have been thrown out for the wolves when the raiders left her at the gates.’
‘The raiders didn’t leave her at the gates, idiot.’
‘Someone did. And they should have left her for the wolves.’
‘It’s not too late. We’ll go to the Lady, tell her we can’t spend another night with her here.’
‘Who knows what she’ll call in on us next?’
Aissa gives up trying to pretend she’s asleep. She opens her eyes.
A cloud of dragonflies is hovering over her.
She flees to the garden, and the dragonflies follow. When they disappear she feels more alone than she’s ever been.
Aissa’s always hated being small, but today she wishes she were smaller. Even more, she wishes she could have turned into a dragonfly and flown away with the cloud.
‘Keep away from us, insect demon!’ Half-One snarls when Aissa tries to snatch a barley cake from the kitchen waste.
‘Go and eat gnats!’ Half-Two adds.
‘We should tell Kelya that she’s a demon.’
‘And when Kelya tells the Lady, No-Name will be thrown off the cliffs.’
‘Or left out to feed the wolves,’ Half-One finishes. She licks her lips, which makes her look even more wolfish than she means to.
They turn together to Squint-Eye. Squint-Eye is so old she spends most of her life in the kitchens now, organising the others – with her stick if she needs to. She’s older even than Kelya, and the girls know that she
and holds her breath to hear
the no-name girl
named and claimed
as the Lady speaks out loud
the choice of the gods.
‘Nasta,’ says the Lady
and shows the mark
of a swimming fish.
Nasta, the eighth girl,
daughter of fishers,
chosen by the gods,
holds herself proud,
salutes the Lady.
Her mother wipes a tear;
Nasta turns
and spits at Aissa.
5
DRAGONFLY BANISHED
The kitchen garden sprawls between the Hall and the houses of the inner town. Its back wall is the solid rock of the mountain. Nothing grows against it, but it’s a good place to dump garbage. Aissa dumped dog droppings onto the pile this morning, and the lottery’s name shards will end up there too.
That’s where mine belongs! Aissa thinks bitterly. Buried in filth .
There are also piles of compost: rotting kitchen scraps, weeds and manure from the dovecotes. The waste shrinks as it turns into rich soil ready to dig into the garden. The three oldest heaps have shrunk so much there’s a gap between them and the cliff – a big enough space for Aissa to crawl through and hide. But she can’t hide from the voices in her own mind, and those are even crueller than the jeers and curses of the audience.
How did I dare?
I wish I’d never learned my name.
It’s a punishment for trespassing into the Lady’s bathroom.
Milli-Cat pushed me out there as if she knew. Is she laughing too?
She can’t bear to think of her only friend betraying her. It’s nearly as bad as wondering what’s going to happen next. Because she knows that Half-One and Half-Two, and every other servant right up to old Squint-Eye, will punish her for standing up as if she were a twelve-year-old girl like any other. She just doesn’t know what the punishment will be.
She waits till dark before she creeps into the servants’ kitchen. The floor is already covered with sleeping bodies, and she’s not brave enough to pick her way across them to find her cloak. She curls up on the bare stones just inside the door, where she can get out before anyone sees her.
But her stubborn name whispers around her head as she sleeps, and she dreams of dragonflies.
She wakes to the hiss of whispers. Swift as an eagle plummeting onto a rabbit, Aissa crashes from her dream into her body.
The kitchen is grey with the first light of dawn. The whispers get louder, like a venom-filled hiss. She huddles on the floor while the poisonous words flood over her.
‘She’s worse than cursed – she’s a demon!’
‘It’s the gods’ answer for letting her attempt the lottery.’
‘She should have been thrown out for the wolves when the raiders left her at the gates.’
‘The raiders didn’t leave her at the gates, idiot.’
‘Someone did. And they should have left her for the wolves.’
‘It’s not too late. We’ll go to the Lady, tell her we can’t spend another night with her here.’
‘Who knows what she’ll call in on us next?’
Aissa gives up trying to pretend she’s asleep. She opens her eyes.
A cloud of dragonflies is hovering over her.
She flees to the garden, and the dragonflies follow. When they disappear she feels more alone than she’s ever been.
Aissa’s always hated being small, but today she wishes she were smaller. Even more, she wishes she could have turned into a dragonfly and flown away with the cloud.
‘Keep away from us, insect demon!’ Half-One snarls when Aissa tries to snatch a barley cake from the kitchen waste.
‘Go and eat gnats!’ Half-Two adds.
‘We should tell Kelya that she’s a demon.’
‘And when Kelya tells the Lady, No-Name will be thrown off the cliffs.’
‘Or left out to feed the wolves,’ Half-One finishes. She licks her lips, which makes her look even more wolfish than she means to.
They turn together to Squint-Eye. Squint-Eye is so old she spends most of her life in the kitchens now, organising the others – with her stick if she needs to. She’s older even than Kelya, and the girls know that she
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