version, but then he surprised himself.
“When I was 6, my dad was in a car accident. He was T-boned by a stupid kid in an unsafe intersection on his way to work. He had a head injury. It didn’t seem to be too bad at first. He went back to work and all, but he had headaches. And then when I was 7 or 8 he got dementia. He started to forget things, like how to get to work. And then he stopped being able to drive a car.”
Emma’s face contorted with dismay and Jerry had to look away from her. He examined the carpet near his couch, found nothing exciting, and pushed on.
“Eventually it got so bad that he would sit in a chair all day long and not even get up to go to the bathroom or get himself food. My mother became his caregiver. She was very strong for a long time. Physically and emotionally strong. But when I was 14, she left for work one day and just didn’t come home. I talked to her friends at work and she had been seeing another man for about a year. One friend knew the guys name and where he lived so I took the bus and went to see the boyfriend, and he had run out on his rent and taken off at the same time as my mom. I never heard another thing from her.
No one really knew how bad things were in my house. We didn’t have the money to take my dad to a doctor or have someone come in to take care of him. So I did it. He got a disability check every month and that’s what we lived on. I just didn’t go back to school and instead I stayed home, taking care of my dad. I figured out how to pay the bills, I forged his signature and everything. We lived like that for 2 years. I kept hoping my mom would come home. But one day I woke up and I knew she wasn’t going to. I knew that was it. This was my life now. After that day I thought long and hard about calling someone. The police, the hospital, someone. But I was scared. Where would I go if they came and took him and put him in a home? Into foster care? Into an orphanage? We didn’t have any family close by. None that I had ever met. So I didn’t call anyone. But I did start leaving the house during the day. I would just walk and walk for miles.”
Emma interrupted him. “Jerry, what about your sister?”
“She’s my half-sister. Mom and dad split up for a bit just before the accident. Dad managed to get his ex-girlfriend pregnant. She never lived at our house. I didn’t really connect with her till we were adults.” Jerry wondered at the shame he felt while he told Emma this. Was he ashamed of his father? Or at himself? Didn’t he have enough going on already? He didn’t need to feel bad about this too. He marked it as inconsequential and kept talking.
“I was tall already and probably could pass for older than 16, so I never got any flack from the cops for truancy. But then I met Rodney. He was a gang member but I didn’t know it at the time. Emotionally and socially, I think my growth had kind of stalled when my mom left. So I was a 14 year old in a 16 year olds body. And I thought Rodney was fascinating. He was strong and cool and he didn’t take any shit from anyone. And I owed him from day one. The day I met him, I was walking to the grocery store to buy groceries, and a gang of teenagers started picking on me for no reason. They were walking behind me stepping on the backs of my shoes and laughing when my foot came out. There were 6 or 7 of them and I was getting scared. There were businesses and cars on the street but I still didn’t know if anyone would help me if they just knocked me down and beat me up. That kind of thing happens quickly. When I had been in school it happened all the time. After I got rolled twice I learned to never walk anywhere by myself.
So Rodney is just coming out of a shop and he sees what they are doing to me and he gets between me and them and calls them out on it. I thought that was crazy. He was just one guy, and there were 6 of them. So one guy shoves him, and he pulls out a gun and points it at him. They
“When I was 6, my dad was in a car accident. He was T-boned by a stupid kid in an unsafe intersection on his way to work. He had a head injury. It didn’t seem to be too bad at first. He went back to work and all, but he had headaches. And then when I was 7 or 8 he got dementia. He started to forget things, like how to get to work. And then he stopped being able to drive a car.”
Emma’s face contorted with dismay and Jerry had to look away from her. He examined the carpet near his couch, found nothing exciting, and pushed on.
“Eventually it got so bad that he would sit in a chair all day long and not even get up to go to the bathroom or get himself food. My mother became his caregiver. She was very strong for a long time. Physically and emotionally strong. But when I was 14, she left for work one day and just didn’t come home. I talked to her friends at work and she had been seeing another man for about a year. One friend knew the guys name and where he lived so I took the bus and went to see the boyfriend, and he had run out on his rent and taken off at the same time as my mom. I never heard another thing from her.
No one really knew how bad things were in my house. We didn’t have the money to take my dad to a doctor or have someone come in to take care of him. So I did it. He got a disability check every month and that’s what we lived on. I just didn’t go back to school and instead I stayed home, taking care of my dad. I figured out how to pay the bills, I forged his signature and everything. We lived like that for 2 years. I kept hoping my mom would come home. But one day I woke up and I knew she wasn’t going to. I knew that was it. This was my life now. After that day I thought long and hard about calling someone. The police, the hospital, someone. But I was scared. Where would I go if they came and took him and put him in a home? Into foster care? Into an orphanage? We didn’t have any family close by. None that I had ever met. So I didn’t call anyone. But I did start leaving the house during the day. I would just walk and walk for miles.”
Emma interrupted him. “Jerry, what about your sister?”
“She’s my half-sister. Mom and dad split up for a bit just before the accident. Dad managed to get his ex-girlfriend pregnant. She never lived at our house. I didn’t really connect with her till we were adults.” Jerry wondered at the shame he felt while he told Emma this. Was he ashamed of his father? Or at himself? Didn’t he have enough going on already? He didn’t need to feel bad about this too. He marked it as inconsequential and kept talking.
“I was tall already and probably could pass for older than 16, so I never got any flack from the cops for truancy. But then I met Rodney. He was a gang member but I didn’t know it at the time. Emotionally and socially, I think my growth had kind of stalled when my mom left. So I was a 14 year old in a 16 year olds body. And I thought Rodney was fascinating. He was strong and cool and he didn’t take any shit from anyone. And I owed him from day one. The day I met him, I was walking to the grocery store to buy groceries, and a gang of teenagers started picking on me for no reason. They were walking behind me stepping on the backs of my shoes and laughing when my foot came out. There were 6 or 7 of them and I was getting scared. There were businesses and cars on the street but I still didn’t know if anyone would help me if they just knocked me down and beat me up. That kind of thing happens quickly. When I had been in school it happened all the time. After I got rolled twice I learned to never walk anywhere by myself.
So Rodney is just coming out of a shop and he sees what they are doing to me and he gets between me and them and calls them out on it. I thought that was crazy. He was just one guy, and there were 6 of them. So one guy shoves him, and he pulls out a gun and points it at him. They
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