EllRay Jakes Rocks the Holidays! by Sally Warner Page A

adds, determined to have the last word.
    Mom, Dad, and I exchange quick, secret looks, trying silently to figure out what to say next to avoid one of her meltdowns. “Well, moving on,” Mom finally says. “Who wants some dessert? We have applesauce or ice cream.”
    Guess which one I choose?

    It is now Thursday morning, the day before the big assembly,
An Oak Glen Winter Wonderland.
But I have a feeling that
today
is going to be a big day, too—because I’m pretty sure Kevin’s going to come up with a Thursday challenge for me.
    What’s it gonna be?
    It’s raining out,
hard
, so at least my poor hands will get off easy this time.
    “Let’s go through our song, girls and boys,” Ms. Sanchez says after taking attendance. Each class has just started practicing its song, so there won’t be time for a big group rehearsal. But since I will be the emcee for the first assembly, I know what the songs will be. Ms. Sanchez gave me a list so I could learn how to announce them.
    1. The kindergarteners will sing “Jingle Bells,” complete with construction paper antlers tied around their heads—though I’m not sure why they always pretend to be reindeer. Because it’s tradition, I guess.
    2. The first grade is singing “Frosty the Snowman.” No drama there.
    3. Second grade will sing “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch,” which should be funny. I wish we’d gotten that song!
    4. And we third-graders are singing “Jingle Bell Rock,” like we planned, only we’re singing the whole thing twice. The girls will do their jingle bell dance in the middle of it. Seeing their moves,Ms. Sanchez has already warned them to “tone it down a little.” But judging from their rehearsals at recess, anything could happen.
    So, perfect! There’s nothing about religion—or sugar—in any of the songs, which I guess will make Principal James and any grouchy parents happy.
    Ms. Sanchez says the words to a song are called “lyrics.” “Jingle Bell Rock” has some weird lyrics, no offense. I’ve heard the song before and one of the first lines says, “Blowing up bushels of fun.” I’m not even kidding! I’m surprised we’re allowed to sing about blowing things up, much less at Christmastime. I mean, at Winter Wonderland time. But us boys will probably sing that line the loudest.
    KA-BLAMMM-O !
    “EllRay. Listen up,” Kevin whispers as Fiona McNulty passes out the lyrics—which we are supposed to have memorized by tomorrow,
ha, ha
. “Challenge number two, dude. You have to say ‘I love you’ to Fiona when she hands you the paper.”
    “
What
?” I say, trying not to squawk. “Dude. This is really challenge number three, counting the emcee thing.”
    “And you have to say it so she can hear you,” Kevin adds, ignoring my argument. “
No whispering
.”
    A couple of guys—Jared and Stanley, anyway—must have been given the heads-up on this second challenge, because they’re grinning big-time, watching and waiting.
    So, I guess they’re in on what’s happening, now.
    And Fiona and her weak ankles are getting closer.
    Look. I like Fiona McNulty just fine, especially when we’re doing art. You get good ideas just from spying on what she does. But
Kevin’s
the one who kind of likes her. So this is just weird!
    And now, she is nearing my desk.
    And I have to say I love her.
    Only doing this, and then completing the final challenge, using Kevin’s messed-up arithmetic, will balance things out between me and him.
    And then we can be friends, and everything will blend together again.
    She’s getting closer
.
    Closer.
    Closer.
    She hands one of the papers to Emma, who sitsnext to me. Fiona is acting important, I notice—as if she has been appointed Ms. Sanchez’s official Vice Teacher. Maybe permanently.
    “Here you go, EllRay,” she says, handing me a piece of paper.
    I guess the jingle hop
has
begun.
    “Thanks, Fiona,” I say. “I love you. Have a nice day,” I add, all in the exact same tone of