Embrace Me At Dawn by Shayla Black Page B

wished a thousand times since that day that I’d shown you how to defend yourself. I never thought you’d need it in our own home. For that, I’m deeply sorry.”
    His speech caught her off guard, and so soon after Shock had popped the cork off her emotions, she was having a hard time bottling them back up. The sting of forming tears assaulted her eyes, and she blinked them away. “I don’t know if it would have helped, but that sounds worth learning.”
    He sent her a nod, then prowled closer, circling behind her. She tensed.
    “ It’s just me,” he whispered as he hooked his arm around her neck and dragged her against his body again. His wide shoulders cradled her, hard chest and abdomen supporting her. His hard cock nestled at the small of her back. Almost as soon as she felt it, he eased the lower half of his body away. She ached, knowing that he was every bit as aroused by this close-quarters touching as she was. But their relationship was over, the chasm so wide between them that nothing would fix it. Sex would satisfy her deep longing to touch and soothe him—and it would be the biggest mistake of her life.
    Bracing his other hand at her hip, he held the lower half of her body just slightly away from his, but he bent his head right to her ear and murmured, “I’ve come up behind you with the intent to attack you. What’s your first instinct? Do it now.”
    His low voice in her ear, demanding of her, made her shiver. She really shouldn’t respond to it or him. Then his words sank in. First instinct?
    For a moment, she froze. Then his grip tightened, and actual panic started to creep in as her fight or flight instinct took over. She tried desperately to thrash and shove his arm away, anything to get free from his unyielding hold. Lucan wasn’t budging. She tried to push harder, getting her whole body into the struggle, jostling against him, kicking back with her feet, moving her entire torso so she’d be harder to hold onto.
    Lucan wrapped his arm around her neck tighter, then moved the hand at her hip across her waist, yanking her right against him, trapping her arm against her body. Then he hooked one calf around her legs and hauled her up on her tiptoes. She had one arm free to fight back, but though she shoved, yelled, and thrashed, Lucan’s hold on her was absolute. Her frantic movements slowed. Each of her blows was harder, more calculated, but nothing she did had any effect on his grip. He squeezed her against him and began dragging her away.
    Panicked, Anka tried to drag her feet. “No…” Tears stabbed at her eyes. “No, Lucan, don’t! Please…”
    Immediately, he released her and turned her toward him, cradling her face. “Look at me. Just me.” Slowly, she focused her wild gaze, and he stared back, face heavy with concern. “I don’t think you’re ready for this, Anka. You haven’t worked through everything that’s happened to you.”
    “ Consider this my therapy.” She sniffled, determined to hold her tears back.
    “ Training isn’t the place to work out your inner demons. You need a clear head and a single purpose. Every time I come up behind you, you’re panicking, love.” He closed his eyes, regret carving itself deeper into his expression. “I wasn’t there that terrible night. For that, I will always be sorrier than you’ll ever know. I don’t know the details of your attack, but I can guess that Mathias grabbed you from behind. I’m not doing anything to intentionally frighten you. It’s all right if you’re not able to fight or face this kind of violence. There’s nothing wrong with leaving the fight to the other wizards and me.”
    His words washed over her, gentle, almost pitying. Shame filled her. And anger. Lucan didn’t understand. She couldn’t outrun herself anymore. She’d tried. There was no peace in being a bystander, especially not in her own life. As frightening as this was, doing nothing terrified her far more. “I’m not giving up. I’m not