Enduringly Yours by Olivia Stocum Page B

way. When he first set eyes on me, he knew I was the one.”
    Zipporah gave that a moment to settle. It landed in the achy hole deep inside her gut. The one Peter had gouged out when he left.
    “If the temptation should become too great,” Lady Havendell said, “know that I will not blame you. Just make sure he takes you home first, and that John sanctions your union. No more sneaking about with him, please.”
    Zipporah felt heat flush up her face and seep deeply into her hairline. “I could not leave you here alone, Mother.”
    “I would rather see you with Peter than Gilburn.” Lady Havendell stood. She kissed Zipporah’s cheek.
    “What would you do if I left?”
    “Do not worry about me.”
    “How could I not?”
    “Try and get some rest,” Lady Havendell said. “Things always look better in the morning.”
     
    * * *
     
    After sleeping very little, things did not look better in the morning. Zipporah dressed, braided her hair, then made her way downstairs, taking her seat next to her mother in the great hall.
    “Have you been in to see Father yet?” she asked.
    “Aye, first thing,” her mother said. “He was awake long enough to drink some wine.”
    “Does he ever talk to you?”
    “Nay.” Lady Havendell took her hand, squeezing it. “Peter will take care of everything. Give him a chance.”
    “I was up last night thinking,” she said over her mother. “We hid my condition in order to save my pride.” She paused as a maid set a flagon in front of them. Filling a mug with ale, she shifted closer and passed it to her mother. “If we had told Father about Katrina, he would’ve been angry at first, aye, but he also would have taken care of everything. And I . . . well I . . .” Would be married to Peter.
    “I seem to recall an angry young lady who wanted nothing of the sort, who wanted no more than to be put quietly aside with her baby.”
    That had been the plan. They had even found a home for her with a young noblewoman in France who was expecting her first child. Zipporah was to serve as a nursemaid.
    She filled a cup for herself, wondering how long one could live on drink alone. Food wasn’t currently agreeing with her. She glanced around the hall. “Where is my suitor this morning?”
    “Which one?”
    She eyed her mother. “Sir Gilburn.”
    “I am not sure. I haven’t seen him.”
    “Thank heaven for small favors.” Zipporah finished her ale and stood. “I am going to sit with Father.”
    “But your meal?”
    “I cannot eat.”
    Zipporah left the great hall before her mother could stop her. She made her way to her father’s chamber, wishing she didn’t feel so confused. That she was vulnerable in her tainted-unwed-condition was nothing new, but with her father incapacitated everything was coming to a head. How much longer could she hide her secrets? Would it get her killed and her mother exiled from her place among the nobility? Her father had risked his life to give them land and a future, and she had thrown it away on a young knight with soft hands.
    The door to her father’s chamber opened. The tall Sir Gilburn emerged. She took a step back.
    His eyes widened when he saw her. “My lady?”
    “Sir Gilburn.”
    He ducked his head in greeting. He smelled of sage today. “Your father is resting.”
    “Isn’t he always?” Zipporah glanced down the corridor. They were alone. “I just want to see him.”
    “I have given it some thought, and I believe your visits with him are not beneficial.” He was standing between her and the door. “They only seem to distress you.”
    Was he going to forbid her to see her father now? “Would it not be more distressing for me if I were not to see him at all? There is so little I can do for my father. I just want to sit with him.”
    “You are a devoted daughter,” he said. Gilburn looked her over, making her skin prickle. Finally, he stepped aside. “Go ahead.”
    She reached for the door pull.
    “When you are finished here, come