in my chest.
He’s actually taking my side on this? I have no words. Truly, no words.
Benson scowls. “Keeping him there won’t do us any good either. He’ll be a wasted resource and potentially threaten the success of any future investigation. Besides, you’ve said it yourself, Agent Lovelly isn’t exactly known to follow orders.”
I flinch. There’s truth to her statement. Fisher was the one who had dreams of becoming an FBI agent. Not me. The only thing I wanted was to break free of the restraints that were holding me back, escape the expectations and judgment of my father.
But Fisher didn’t want to do it alone. And, like so many other times, I joined him, abandoning my law degree midstream and applying to the FBI recruitment program out of fun. I never thought they’d actually accept me. But one thing led to another, and before I could figure out what the hell happened, I was a NAT, moving a few hundred miles away from my family in Georgia and setting up shop in Quantico, Virginia. I wanted to quit several times, but Fisher always managed to change my mind. We both graduated with flying colors, and were assigned to different field offices.
And then, fourteen months later, I suddenly received a call from Fisher telling me that he’d been kicked out for not following protocol. I should have known then that it had something to do with his family, because Fisher always followed rules, while I thrived on bending them.
As if on cue, Wilson says, “You’re absolutely right, ma’am. He’s an uncontrollable variable.”
Thanks for the vote of confidence , boss . Wilson doesn’t see me cringe and continues talking about me like I’m not here.
“But Agent Lovelly did graduate with the Director’s Leadership Award, which speaks highly of his capabilities. He may be a pain in the ass, but he has always proven to be one of our best students.”
Benson doesn’t look impressed. “And, as you know, Wilson, experience in the classroom doesn’t always translate to experience in the field. I’ve known plenty of agents who failed miserably on their first few assignments. And I’m not about to risk the chance to put away someone like Stamos by assigning the case to someone who can’t follow direction.”
“With all due respect, Assistant Director, Agent Lovelly has already achieved what the previous agent couldn’t.” He actually sounds pissed, or maybe it’s losing patience. I can’t tell. “For better or worse, he’s already in position, and I say we use him to take Stamos down once and for all. It’d be foolish not to.”
Assistant Director Benson crosses her arms, thinking on it. Her jaw clenches and unclenches several times.
All this waiting has me coiled up in a bundle of nerves. I grind my teeth so hard, I might have heard a molar pop. Assistant Director Benson stares at me, assessing, and I fidget, shifting my weight from foot to foot.
A few more painful seconds pass before she turns to Wilson and finally, finally , says, “Get him debriefed. Then, if everything checks out, give him a team and arm him with whatever he needs. . . . And make sure Neil Harris is on it. He and Lovelly worked well together at Quantico, if memory serves.” Then she walks over to me and levels a pointed gaze at mine. “Don’t fuck this up, Lovelly.”
“I won’t, ma’am.” I can barely contain my excitement. I can’t believe this worked.
Benson nods once and then leaves. When the door shuts behind me, Wilson smiles. “Well, Lovelly, I guess you got yourself your first undercover assignment.”
I guess I did.
I’M NERVOUS AS hell. Today is my final audition with The Torque, and I couldn’t sleep all night. I think I slept for maybe an hour, two tops, before I gave up and decided to down a whole lot of shots instead. Espresso shots, that is. My brain is wired so tight, I wouldn’t be surprised if I looked like an axe murderer.
Hell , I ’ ll fit right in , I think as I stare
He’s actually taking my side on this? I have no words. Truly, no words.
Benson scowls. “Keeping him there won’t do us any good either. He’ll be a wasted resource and potentially threaten the success of any future investigation. Besides, you’ve said it yourself, Agent Lovelly isn’t exactly known to follow orders.”
I flinch. There’s truth to her statement. Fisher was the one who had dreams of becoming an FBI agent. Not me. The only thing I wanted was to break free of the restraints that were holding me back, escape the expectations and judgment of my father.
But Fisher didn’t want to do it alone. And, like so many other times, I joined him, abandoning my law degree midstream and applying to the FBI recruitment program out of fun. I never thought they’d actually accept me. But one thing led to another, and before I could figure out what the hell happened, I was a NAT, moving a few hundred miles away from my family in Georgia and setting up shop in Quantico, Virginia. I wanted to quit several times, but Fisher always managed to change my mind. We both graduated with flying colors, and were assigned to different field offices.
And then, fourteen months later, I suddenly received a call from Fisher telling me that he’d been kicked out for not following protocol. I should have known then that it had something to do with his family, because Fisher always followed rules, while I thrived on bending them.
As if on cue, Wilson says, “You’re absolutely right, ma’am. He’s an uncontrollable variable.”
Thanks for the vote of confidence , boss . Wilson doesn’t see me cringe and continues talking about me like I’m not here.
“But Agent Lovelly did graduate with the Director’s Leadership Award, which speaks highly of his capabilities. He may be a pain in the ass, but he has always proven to be one of our best students.”
Benson doesn’t look impressed. “And, as you know, Wilson, experience in the classroom doesn’t always translate to experience in the field. I’ve known plenty of agents who failed miserably on their first few assignments. And I’m not about to risk the chance to put away someone like Stamos by assigning the case to someone who can’t follow direction.”
“With all due respect, Assistant Director, Agent Lovelly has already achieved what the previous agent couldn’t.” He actually sounds pissed, or maybe it’s losing patience. I can’t tell. “For better or worse, he’s already in position, and I say we use him to take Stamos down once and for all. It’d be foolish not to.”
Assistant Director Benson crosses her arms, thinking on it. Her jaw clenches and unclenches several times.
All this waiting has me coiled up in a bundle of nerves. I grind my teeth so hard, I might have heard a molar pop. Assistant Director Benson stares at me, assessing, and I fidget, shifting my weight from foot to foot.
A few more painful seconds pass before she turns to Wilson and finally, finally , says, “Get him debriefed. Then, if everything checks out, give him a team and arm him with whatever he needs. . . . And make sure Neil Harris is on it. He and Lovelly worked well together at Quantico, if memory serves.” Then she walks over to me and levels a pointed gaze at mine. “Don’t fuck this up, Lovelly.”
“I won’t, ma’am.” I can barely contain my excitement. I can’t believe this worked.
Benson nods once and then leaves. When the door shuts behind me, Wilson smiles. “Well, Lovelly, I guess you got yourself your first undercover assignment.”
I guess I did.
I’M NERVOUS AS hell. Today is my final audition with The Torque, and I couldn’t sleep all night. I think I slept for maybe an hour, two tops, before I gave up and decided to down a whole lot of shots instead. Espresso shots, that is. My brain is wired so tight, I wouldn’t be surprised if I looked like an axe murderer.
Hell , I ’ ll fit right in , I think as I stare
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