he began slowly. “But I am aware of the untenable position Owen left you in. I realize what you are facing.”
Mariah bit her lip. “Yes, there is that fact. That you knew what Owen intended and did not share it with me.”
He frowned and for the first time since their first meeting, he actually looked chagrined. “I suppose I hoped he would change his mind.”
“Wh-why didn’t Owen make arrangements for my comfort?” she whispered. In her heart she knew why. He had not loved her, all his promises had been empty, a way to make her surrender fully, to cease her worries so that she would only focus on him. But she wanted to hear it said out loud.
“Heathcote was selfish. He had never experienced any kind of fear or loss financially, so he could not empathize with the idea of such a thing.” John shrugged. “I’m certain he would have settled you well if he had left you instead of died. But he could not picture a time when he would be gone…and if he had…he was too conceited to plan for anyone else’s comfort. Hell, he probably thought the world would end with him.”
Mariah shook her head. The words themselves were a harsh assessment of a man she had loved. But they were accurate. Owen’s sense of his own importance, his sense of his worth to others, had never been a secret. That confidence had once been an attraction. She had expected him to change his stripes, perhaps that had been to her detriment.
“I must be more careful with my next lover,” she said, raising her gaze to meet his. “And choose a protector wisely, as well.”
He nodded after a brief hesitation. “I would not ask you to endanger yourself for my pleasure. It would be unfair.”
Mariah drew back. She hadn’t expected him to understand, yet he did. “Thank you.”
He looked at her evenly. “Does that mean we have come to terms?”
Mariah jolted. “Is that what we have been doing? Negotiating?” He nodded and she couldn’t help but laugh. “I should have had a representative here, I think.”
“Trust me, I have your best interest at heart.” He smiled. “Or at least your best interest is paramount to some part of my body.”
She smiled. Here she was, in an untenable position, and yet John somehow made light of it. Made her laugh when she hadn’t even felt like smiling for weeks. That, at least, was worth pursuing.
“Then I suppose we have come to terms,” she said and stepped forward to take his hand. “I must say, I most look forward to fulfilling them.”
He grinned as he looked down at her. “As do I.”
She shook her head and lifted his hand to her breast, which now ached with the desire to be touched, yet again, by him. She had never felt such strong need before. Even with Owen, they made love and she was satiated. Not that they didn’t do the same over and over some nights, but she had never been driven by need after the first encounter, only a desire to please Owen.
This was different.
“I have never had an affair to please…and pleasure…myself,” she said, trying to focus as John began to gently massage and pluck her breast with those talented fingers of his.
“No?” he asked, his gaze coming up to hers.
She shook her head. “No.”
“Then we must be very certain that you are able to receive whatever you would like, whenever you would like it. As often as you would like it.”
His words were teasing, but his tone and his expression were most definitely not. He never broke his stare from hers, nor did he stop touching her with those amazing hands that seemed to naturally find every spot on her body that ached.
“I am much looking forward to it.”
She leaned toward him, ready to accept his kiss and give over her body to his care, once again, when there was a knock at the door. Both of them jolted, as if surprised that there were even other people still in the world around them.
John stepped back and frowned. “Yes?”
The door opened and Swanson, John’s unflappable butler, stood in
Mariah bit her lip. “Yes, there is that fact. That you knew what Owen intended and did not share it with me.”
He frowned and for the first time since their first meeting, he actually looked chagrined. “I suppose I hoped he would change his mind.”
“Wh-why didn’t Owen make arrangements for my comfort?” she whispered. In her heart she knew why. He had not loved her, all his promises had been empty, a way to make her surrender fully, to cease her worries so that she would only focus on him. But she wanted to hear it said out loud.
“Heathcote was selfish. He had never experienced any kind of fear or loss financially, so he could not empathize with the idea of such a thing.” John shrugged. “I’m certain he would have settled you well if he had left you instead of died. But he could not picture a time when he would be gone…and if he had…he was too conceited to plan for anyone else’s comfort. Hell, he probably thought the world would end with him.”
Mariah shook her head. The words themselves were a harsh assessment of a man she had loved. But they were accurate. Owen’s sense of his own importance, his sense of his worth to others, had never been a secret. That confidence had once been an attraction. She had expected him to change his stripes, perhaps that had been to her detriment.
“I must be more careful with my next lover,” she said, raising her gaze to meet his. “And choose a protector wisely, as well.”
He nodded after a brief hesitation. “I would not ask you to endanger yourself for my pleasure. It would be unfair.”
Mariah drew back. She hadn’t expected him to understand, yet he did. “Thank you.”
He looked at her evenly. “Does that mean we have come to terms?”
Mariah jolted. “Is that what we have been doing? Negotiating?” He nodded and she couldn’t help but laugh. “I should have had a representative here, I think.”
“Trust me, I have your best interest at heart.” He smiled. “Or at least your best interest is paramount to some part of my body.”
She smiled. Here she was, in an untenable position, and yet John somehow made light of it. Made her laugh when she hadn’t even felt like smiling for weeks. That, at least, was worth pursuing.
“Then I suppose we have come to terms,” she said and stepped forward to take his hand. “I must say, I most look forward to fulfilling them.”
He grinned as he looked down at her. “As do I.”
She shook her head and lifted his hand to her breast, which now ached with the desire to be touched, yet again, by him. She had never felt such strong need before. Even with Owen, they made love and she was satiated. Not that they didn’t do the same over and over some nights, but she had never been driven by need after the first encounter, only a desire to please Owen.
This was different.
“I have never had an affair to please…and pleasure…myself,” she said, trying to focus as John began to gently massage and pluck her breast with those talented fingers of his.
“No?” he asked, his gaze coming up to hers.
She shook her head. “No.”
“Then we must be very certain that you are able to receive whatever you would like, whenever you would like it. As often as you would like it.”
His words were teasing, but his tone and his expression were most definitely not. He never broke his stare from hers, nor did he stop touching her with those amazing hands that seemed to naturally find every spot on her body that ached.
“I am much looking forward to it.”
She leaned toward him, ready to accept his kiss and give over her body to his care, once again, when there was a knock at the door. Both of them jolted, as if surprised that there were even other people still in the world around them.
John stepped back and frowned. “Yes?”
The door opened and Swanson, John’s unflappable butler, stood in
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