they hurt. I want to break free of the prison of my
own making. I want to experience life.
"Here we go," says Lucy as she waits
for me to push the lever of my chair forward. Just as we reach the entrance, a
man and woman with their arms around each other burst through the door. The man
doesn't see me and almost falls in my lap. At the last minute he catches
himself. He says, "Oh, God. I'm so sorry. I didn't see you."
"Don't worry about it," I reply.
"It's not your fault."
When they walk away, I hear the woman say,
"Wheelchairs need a bell or something to warn people they're coming."
Lucy says low. "What an idiot. I'd like to hang
a bell around her neck so people know when she's coming. She's in my
English class and snotty as hell."
My courage is starting to falter and Lucy says
as soon as we enter. "Hey, there's a spot over in the corner. Com'on."
People have to shift out of the way as I wheel
past them and I'm wishing I was anywhere but here. Finally, we reach the table.
Lucy moves a chair out of the way so I can wheel around to the back and face
the front of the room. I let out the breath I've been holding. Maybe I really
don't want to learn how to become a normal person; maybe I want to stay a
recluse.
A cute girl bounces over to us. "What can I
get you two?"
Lucy says, "I'd like a beer, anything light."
She glances at me.
"Ah, I'll have the same."
The waitress asks, "We got some great
nachos. Want to order them, too?"
Lucy knows I love nachos. She says, "Yeah,
make that a large order."
The nice girl says, "Got it. But I've got
to card you for the beers."
Lucy says, "No problem." We both hand
over our driver's licenses. We had them ready because we knew we'd be carded.
The waitress checks our ID, grins, and says,
"Enjoy your evening." She bounces away.
I start to relax and take in my surroundings.
The room is dark, but not so dark that faces can't be seen. There's a long bar
that runs the length of the wall opposite us. I'm glad we're not close to it. I
want to observe people without being observed myself. There are several guys
and gals sitting at the bar and watching a game of pool going on to my right.
The players are a man and a woman. Whenever the woman bends over, her cleavage
practically falls out of her low cut top. She sinks a red ball into a corner pocket.
The women at the bar cheer. The guy she's playing against smirks and says
something I can't hear. The woman misses her next shot, but grins seductively
at him. The other guys cheer their friend on. He strikes the cue ball, misses
his mark, and the cue ball rolls into a pocket. The women give each other
high-fives and the men harass the guy.
Someone walks to the juke box that's close to
the entrance and puts coins in it. Adam Lampbert's voice fills the room. I've
always liked figuring out the lyrics to songs and his voice makes it easy. He
sings my favorite part.
If I wanted to leave I would have left by now
But you're the only one who knows me
Better than I know myself
Our waitress returns balancing a tray on one
hand. "Here ya go, girls." She sets the nachos in the center of our
table and then places plates and utensils down. Next, she sets out mugs and
then our beer bottles. The mugs are chilled.
Lucy pours beer into my glass while I scoop
nachos onto my plate. With my first bite, I say, "Oh, yeah. These are
great." Lucy grabs a chip dripping with meat, cheese, sour cream, and
salsa right from the center of the plate and shoves it in her mouth. She follows
it with a gulp of beer straight from her bottle. "Marvelous," she
says with a full mouth.
I lift my mug and take a small sip of beer. I
almost gag. Lucy's watching and giggles. She leans forward and whispers,
"I knew it. This is your first beer, right?"
Sheepishly, I nod.
She whispers again. "Don't worry. The taste
gets better."
"I sure hope so," I whisper back.
For the next fifteen minutes we watch the
comings and goings of customers and a new game of pool starts. A few
own making. I want to experience life.
"Here we go," says Lucy as she waits
for me to push the lever of my chair forward. Just as we reach the entrance, a
man and woman with their arms around each other burst through the door. The man
doesn't see me and almost falls in my lap. At the last minute he catches
himself. He says, "Oh, God. I'm so sorry. I didn't see you."
"Don't worry about it," I reply.
"It's not your fault."
When they walk away, I hear the woman say,
"Wheelchairs need a bell or something to warn people they're coming."
Lucy says low. "What an idiot. I'd like to hang
a bell around her neck so people know when she's coming. She's in my
English class and snotty as hell."
My courage is starting to falter and Lucy says
as soon as we enter. "Hey, there's a spot over in the corner. Com'on."
People have to shift out of the way as I wheel
past them and I'm wishing I was anywhere but here. Finally, we reach the table.
Lucy moves a chair out of the way so I can wheel around to the back and face
the front of the room. I let out the breath I've been holding. Maybe I really
don't want to learn how to become a normal person; maybe I want to stay a
recluse.
A cute girl bounces over to us. "What can I
get you two?"
Lucy says, "I'd like a beer, anything light."
She glances at me.
"Ah, I'll have the same."
The waitress asks, "We got some great
nachos. Want to order them, too?"
Lucy knows I love nachos. She says, "Yeah,
make that a large order."
The nice girl says, "Got it. But I've got
to card you for the beers."
Lucy says, "No problem." We both hand
over our driver's licenses. We had them ready because we knew we'd be carded.
The waitress checks our ID, grins, and says,
"Enjoy your evening." She bounces away.
I start to relax and take in my surroundings.
The room is dark, but not so dark that faces can't be seen. There's a long bar
that runs the length of the wall opposite us. I'm glad we're not close to it. I
want to observe people without being observed myself. There are several guys
and gals sitting at the bar and watching a game of pool going on to my right.
The players are a man and a woman. Whenever the woman bends over, her cleavage
practically falls out of her low cut top. She sinks a red ball into a corner pocket.
The women at the bar cheer. The guy she's playing against smirks and says
something I can't hear. The woman misses her next shot, but grins seductively
at him. The other guys cheer their friend on. He strikes the cue ball, misses
his mark, and the cue ball rolls into a pocket. The women give each other
high-fives and the men harass the guy.
Someone walks to the juke box that's close to
the entrance and puts coins in it. Adam Lampbert's voice fills the room. I've
always liked figuring out the lyrics to songs and his voice makes it easy. He
sings my favorite part.
If I wanted to leave I would have left by now
But you're the only one who knows me
Better than I know myself
Our waitress returns balancing a tray on one
hand. "Here ya go, girls." She sets the nachos in the center of our
table and then places plates and utensils down. Next, she sets out mugs and
then our beer bottles. The mugs are chilled.
Lucy pours beer into my glass while I scoop
nachos onto my plate. With my first bite, I say, "Oh, yeah. These are
great." Lucy grabs a chip dripping with meat, cheese, sour cream, and
salsa right from the center of the plate and shoves it in her mouth. She follows
it with a gulp of beer straight from her bottle. "Marvelous," she
says with a full mouth.
I lift my mug and take a small sip of beer. I
almost gag. Lucy's watching and giggles. She leans forward and whispers,
"I knew it. This is your first beer, right?"
Sheepishly, I nod.
She whispers again. "Don't worry. The taste
gets better."
"I sure hope so," I whisper back.
For the next fifteen minutes we watch the
comings and goings of customers and a new game of pool starts. A few
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