me to keep her hands enclosed in mine and nodded. “Yup. Love Disney. Now enlighten me, old wise one.”
“Can’t you be like that hot Frozen chick and just . . .” I cleared my throat, and readied myself for the best Disney Princess ballad rendition I’d probably ever give. “Let it go, let it go, can’t hold it back anymore . . .”
Releasing my hands, Stella bent at the waist and held her middle as she laughed. “Oh my God. Stop it! I don’t even want to know how or why you know that song.”
I chuckled along with her, because even I had to admit that I gave away too much about myself by knowing even one line of that song. She didn’t need to know that I’d memorized every single word. By heart.
When the laughter subsided and we could both stand upright again, I reclaimed her hands and gazed into her eyes. “Come on, Sunshine. Be the ice queen and let it go.”
“And what exactly is it that I should let go of?” She angled her head, nibbling on that lower lip. Let go of my hands, wrap your arms around my neck, and let me get a taste of those amazing lips already.
“Inhibitions, worries, best laid plans, and most of all . . . your crazy notion that because you’re leaving we can’t have fun while you’re still here. Would that kill you, Stella?”
She closed her eyes and I knew from assessing her body language over the last two days that she was contemplating—even if it was something she was uncertain about.
When she took a beat too long to open her eyes, I leaned in and wrapped my arm around her waist, urging her to continue our walk. “Can I ask why this is so difficult for you? I’m not sure I understand why two people who are obviously hopelessly attracted to one another can’t just . . . be.” Like, really! What’s the issue already? She was making it much harder than it had to be.
Her body tensed beneath my touch. “How can you not see my side of this?” She continued to walk beside me as we wandered further along the shoreline, but her animated movements gave her away. “You know what? I’m calling bullshit again! You know damn well why I can’t just ‘let it go.’ Don’t make me bring up the way you clammed up last night at the hookah bar again. Or would you like me to recount how I saw the exact same fear in your eyes that I feel in my gut?”
Gulp! Lay it on me, sister. She was right. I feared so many things about Stella—the pain she’d leave me in when she was gone, the thought of never seeing her again, never getting a fair chance—but I still wanted to hear her argument so I kept my mouth shut and let her continue.
“I don’t do the insignificant hook-up, Jack. I don’t sleep around—never have, never will. So, as much as I want to be with you—like be with you, be with you —I can’t.” The last two words were a whisper, as if she wished she didn’t have to say them at all.
Maybe she didn’t want certain things to be heard, but I did. “What if I don’t want an insignificant hook-up? What if I want more ?”
Joining her hand with mine where it rested at the center of her hourglass figure, she entangled our fingers together. Was she placating me or giving in? “Believe me, I know how you feel, but what’s the point? I’m not staying here, and as tempting as it is to just ride this out—let it go—and give myself to you the way my heart is begging me to—we’d both wind up hurt in the end.”
I wanted to tell her that the pain would be worth it if it meant getting to be with her, be with her , as she phrased it. Even for a little while. But that would be a lie. If we started anything, once it inevitably ended we’d both be crushed.
Secretly hoping for a miracle to land in our laps, I conceded, “How can something so right be so wrong?”
“Because sometimes the world is a cruel place.”
I hated hearing her so cynical about life, but part of me understood her rationale. We put our faith in greater powers to lead us through this crazy
“Can’t you be like that hot Frozen chick and just . . .” I cleared my throat, and readied myself for the best Disney Princess ballad rendition I’d probably ever give. “Let it go, let it go, can’t hold it back anymore . . .”
Releasing my hands, Stella bent at the waist and held her middle as she laughed. “Oh my God. Stop it! I don’t even want to know how or why you know that song.”
I chuckled along with her, because even I had to admit that I gave away too much about myself by knowing even one line of that song. She didn’t need to know that I’d memorized every single word. By heart.
When the laughter subsided and we could both stand upright again, I reclaimed her hands and gazed into her eyes. “Come on, Sunshine. Be the ice queen and let it go.”
“And what exactly is it that I should let go of?” She angled her head, nibbling on that lower lip. Let go of my hands, wrap your arms around my neck, and let me get a taste of those amazing lips already.
“Inhibitions, worries, best laid plans, and most of all . . . your crazy notion that because you’re leaving we can’t have fun while you’re still here. Would that kill you, Stella?”
She closed her eyes and I knew from assessing her body language over the last two days that she was contemplating—even if it was something she was uncertain about.
When she took a beat too long to open her eyes, I leaned in and wrapped my arm around her waist, urging her to continue our walk. “Can I ask why this is so difficult for you? I’m not sure I understand why two people who are obviously hopelessly attracted to one another can’t just . . . be.” Like, really! What’s the issue already? She was making it much harder than it had to be.
Her body tensed beneath my touch. “How can you not see my side of this?” She continued to walk beside me as we wandered further along the shoreline, but her animated movements gave her away. “You know what? I’m calling bullshit again! You know damn well why I can’t just ‘let it go.’ Don’t make me bring up the way you clammed up last night at the hookah bar again. Or would you like me to recount how I saw the exact same fear in your eyes that I feel in my gut?”
Gulp! Lay it on me, sister. She was right. I feared so many things about Stella—the pain she’d leave me in when she was gone, the thought of never seeing her again, never getting a fair chance—but I still wanted to hear her argument so I kept my mouth shut and let her continue.
“I don’t do the insignificant hook-up, Jack. I don’t sleep around—never have, never will. So, as much as I want to be with you—like be with you, be with you —I can’t.” The last two words were a whisper, as if she wished she didn’t have to say them at all.
Maybe she didn’t want certain things to be heard, but I did. “What if I don’t want an insignificant hook-up? What if I want more ?”
Joining her hand with mine where it rested at the center of her hourglass figure, she entangled our fingers together. Was she placating me or giving in? “Believe me, I know how you feel, but what’s the point? I’m not staying here, and as tempting as it is to just ride this out—let it go—and give myself to you the way my heart is begging me to—we’d both wind up hurt in the end.”
I wanted to tell her that the pain would be worth it if it meant getting to be with her, be with her , as she phrased it. Even for a little while. But that would be a lie. If we started anything, once it inevitably ended we’d both be crushed.
Secretly hoping for a miracle to land in our laps, I conceded, “How can something so right be so wrong?”
“Because sometimes the world is a cruel place.”
I hated hearing her so cynical about life, but part of me understood her rationale. We put our faith in greater powers to lead us through this crazy
Similar Books
