so."
"Well, I suppose there were still a lot of people outside cities having babies at home until then. Look over there, Shelley."
Doris Schmidtheiser had moved to another table and was talking with overbearing animation to an older couple. The woman sitting there was frantically signaling for their bill so they could escape if they got a chance, and the man was leaning back in his chair looking stunned by the sheer force of Doris's insistence.
"Poor things. Makes you feel we ought to rescue them, doesn't it?" Shelley said.
"No. Nobody rescued me. Least of all my best friend—who had the nerve to laugh at me when I took cover."
"She's probably trying to get people to come to her debate," Shelley said, ignoring Jane's accusation. "I do sort of feel sorry for her. Maybe I'll go. Just sit in on it long enough to swell the crowd a bit."
"What do you anticipate in the way of a crowd? Two or three misguided martyrs?"
"Oh, she might get a good turnout. After all, this whole Tsar thing is of interest to the people attending the convention. The Holnagradians, or whatever you'd call them."
"I think it's a swell idea for you to offer yourself up that way."
"You're not curious?"
"Not in the least," Jane said. "With my three kids, I've heard very nearly every subject on earth debated at some time or another. Though I'll bet this crowd won't sprinkle their arguments with terms like 'butt breath'. That's very popular just now."
Shelley laughed. "Might liven things up a bit if they did. So what are you going to do instead?"
"First I'm going to find the girls. They were supposed to check in with me—"
"Oh, I forgot. They came by the front desk while you were cravenly hiding in that oversized closet. They said they were going to take ski lessons this afternoon. Here on the bunny slope. And the little boys are still in the game room. They probably won't come out until it's time to go home."
"In that case, the first thing I'm going to do is take a nice, long nap. It's the only thing I'm going to do, matter of fact. I haven't had a serious nap in about two years. I mean a 'significant' put-on-jammies, get-under-covers nap."
Shelley signed the tab and Jane took care of the tip.
"Enjoy yourself," Shelley said as they parted ways in the lobby.
"I am," Jane said. "I really am."
Jane wasn't used to naps and woke up at four feeling stupid and disconcerted, as if she had a bad case of jet lag or had suffered a spell of amnesia and lost half a day. But by the time she'd showered and dressed, she was feeling quite refreshed. She took Willard out for a bit of a run and was just coming back when Mike and Mel showed up. Their faces were sunburned and Mel was limping along, exhausted.
"Did you have fun? Did you get hurt?" she asked.
"It was great, Mom!" Mike said. "And I did great for a first-timer."
"He sure did," Mel agreed. "I couldn't believe how he took to it."
"I met a girl I'm taking out to dinner, Mom, if that's okay," Mike said.
"Sure. Whatever."
Mike bounded across the parking lot to the men's quarters. Mel said wearily, "I'm a hundred and four years old. I could have been beaten with a baseball bat and feel better than I do now. Do you have any idea how much work skiing can be?"
"I thought you'd done this before."
"I had. Lots. When I was about Mike's age. Centuries ago."
"Then go take a hot bath and you'll feel better."
"I'd just drown," Mel said grumpily. "Why are you so damned perky?"
"Perky? Why, Mel, nobody's called me perky in ages. I had a nap."
"A nap," he said, his expression misty and filled with longing.
"Go take one yourself. It's a vacation. You can do whatever you want."
He put his arm around her waist and leered. "Not exactly
anything
. Not on this vacation anyhow, surrounded as we are by your children."
"Well, nearly anything. I'm going to rescue Shelley from the genealogists and see if the boys have suffered any permanent mental disability from a day with the video games. I'll come fetch you later
"Well, I suppose there were still a lot of people outside cities having babies at home until then. Look over there, Shelley."
Doris Schmidtheiser had moved to another table and was talking with overbearing animation to an older couple. The woman sitting there was frantically signaling for their bill so they could escape if they got a chance, and the man was leaning back in his chair looking stunned by the sheer force of Doris's insistence.
"Poor things. Makes you feel we ought to rescue them, doesn't it?" Shelley said.
"No. Nobody rescued me. Least of all my best friend—who had the nerve to laugh at me when I took cover."
"She's probably trying to get people to come to her debate," Shelley said, ignoring Jane's accusation. "I do sort of feel sorry for her. Maybe I'll go. Just sit in on it long enough to swell the crowd a bit."
"What do you anticipate in the way of a crowd? Two or three misguided martyrs?"
"Oh, she might get a good turnout. After all, this whole Tsar thing is of interest to the people attending the convention. The Holnagradians, or whatever you'd call them."
"I think it's a swell idea for you to offer yourself up that way."
"You're not curious?"
"Not in the least," Jane said. "With my three kids, I've heard very nearly every subject on earth debated at some time or another. Though I'll bet this crowd won't sprinkle their arguments with terms like 'butt breath'. That's very popular just now."
Shelley laughed. "Might liven things up a bit if they did. So what are you going to do instead?"
"First I'm going to find the girls. They were supposed to check in with me—"
"Oh, I forgot. They came by the front desk while you were cravenly hiding in that oversized closet. They said they were going to take ski lessons this afternoon. Here on the bunny slope. And the little boys are still in the game room. They probably won't come out until it's time to go home."
"In that case, the first thing I'm going to do is take a nice, long nap. It's the only thing I'm going to do, matter of fact. I haven't had a serious nap in about two years. I mean a 'significant' put-on-jammies, get-under-covers nap."
Shelley signed the tab and Jane took care of the tip.
"Enjoy yourself," Shelley said as they parted ways in the lobby.
"I am," Jane said. "I really am."
Jane wasn't used to naps and woke up at four feeling stupid and disconcerted, as if she had a bad case of jet lag or had suffered a spell of amnesia and lost half a day. But by the time she'd showered and dressed, she was feeling quite refreshed. She took Willard out for a bit of a run and was just coming back when Mike and Mel showed up. Their faces were sunburned and Mel was limping along, exhausted.
"Did you have fun? Did you get hurt?" she asked.
"It was great, Mom!" Mike said. "And I did great for a first-timer."
"He sure did," Mel agreed. "I couldn't believe how he took to it."
"I met a girl I'm taking out to dinner, Mom, if that's okay," Mike said.
"Sure. Whatever."
Mike bounded across the parking lot to the men's quarters. Mel said wearily, "I'm a hundred and four years old. I could have been beaten with a baseball bat and feel better than I do now. Do you have any idea how much work skiing can be?"
"I thought you'd done this before."
"I had. Lots. When I was about Mike's age. Centuries ago."
"Then go take a hot bath and you'll feel better."
"I'd just drown," Mel said grumpily. "Why are you so damned perky?"
"Perky? Why, Mel, nobody's called me perky in ages. I had a nap."
"A nap," he said, his expression misty and filled with longing.
"Go take one yourself. It's a vacation. You can do whatever you want."
He put his arm around her waist and leered. "Not exactly
anything
. Not on this vacation anyhow, surrounded as we are by your children."
"Well, nearly anything. I'm going to rescue Shelley from the genealogists and see if the boys have suffered any permanent mental disability from a day with the video games. I'll come fetch you later
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