Gathering Clouds by V. C. Andrews Page A

I was evaporating, disappearing. I had my hand on my stomach and although it was too early to feel life moving inside me. I would swear to this day that I did feel something. Maybe it was just my stomach gurgling, but it was enough.
    I stepped into the hallway and then ran out of the dormitory after him. he was already crossing the lawn toward the road where he would either turn to get a taxi or wait for a bus. He was silhouetted in the moonlight, moving like a shadow through a dream. I hurried after him and started to shout his name and then stopped.
    I just stood there watching him disappear. Then I lowered my head and walked back to the dormitory. I was afraid Lynette had returned to our room and I didn’t want to face her so I stopped again and just walked around for hours. I wasn’t feeling sorry for myself either.
    On the contrary, I was angry and disappointed at myself. Maybe Victoria was the smarter one, I thought. Maybe all I’ll do my whole life is mess up my life and other people’s lives, including the life that is growing inside me. Confusion spun me around. I didn’t know which way to turn. Should I go cry on Lynette’s shoulders? What for? I thought. What could she do and what if she told Marcus and he told Larry? Should I just run off? To where? What would I do? I had really never been on my own.
    I didn’t realize how hard and how much I was crying until the tears started to drip from my chin. I gazed back at the dormitory. Most of the girls were asleep by now. Their lights were out. Lynette was probably wondering where I had gone. She was probably laughing about it, however, thinking I had impulsively decided to go somewhere to celebrate with Larry. Tomorrow’s test be damned.
    What I did finally was go to my car, start it up, and drive aimlessly about, talking to myself, yelling at myself. Finally, exhausted, I pulled into an all-night convenience store and bought myself some bottled water. I sat there in my car drinking it and staring at the street.
    So what are you going to do now, Big Shot? I asked myself.
    I had no answers.
    And then I looked at the pay phone and realized there was only one person to go to, one person who could handle my crisis, one person who knew the answers. I got out of my car and went to the phone.
    It rang and rang because of the hour, but as I expected, my mother picked up. Daddy might not even be home tonight , I thought. As it turned out, I was right about that. He was on one of his famous business trips.
    “Mom,” I said. It was rare I called her that. I almost always addressed her as Mother.
    She heard the panic in my voice.
    “Megan? What is it? What’s wrong?”
    “Mom, I’m pregnant,” I just blurted.
    She was silent, but only for a second or two.
    “How long?” she asked without questioning whether I was positive or not.
    “I’m well into my fourth month, but I won’t have an abortion. I won’t.”
    “Do you realize what you’re saying?”
    “Yes. I can’t do it because . . .”
    “Because why, Megan?
    “Because the man I love, the man whose baby I’m carrying doesn’t know I’m pregnant and must not know.”
    “Are you crazy? Have you gone completely crazy?”
    “I’m sorry,” was I all could say.
    “Who does know?”
    “No one besides you and me.”
    “Where are you?”
    “I don’t know. Some small place near the college at a convenience store on a pay phone.”
    “You can’t keep it a secret much longer. How can you think you can remain there and be pregnant, Megan?”
    I sucked in my breath.
    “I don’t,” I said.
    “You’re damn right you don’t.”
    I could almost hear her mind churning away, working out the details and the solutions.
    “Go back to the dorm. Go to sleep. When you wake up, start packing your things. I’ll call you and tell you where to go.”
    “I’m not going to have an abortion,” I repeated.
    “Who is this young man? How long have you been seeing him? Don’t tell me this comes from a one-night