voice transmitted anxiety. “Is George all right?”
“Yes, yes. We are both fine. Actually, George is better than fine, as I’m sure you know.”
“Yes! He called me last night. I’m flying over for the wedding. How are you taking this?”
Lance hesitated. “I’m surprised . . .”
“Darling, you were always more dependent on him than he on you, appearances notwithstanding.”
“George had a mother,” Lance replied acidly.
“Oh, darling, that was so long ago . . . get over it.”
“Caro, baby, it’s you I can’t get over!”
Silvery laughter greeted his exclamation.
“Lance, I’m now a grandmother, thirty pounds heavier and twenty years older than the woman you loved. Keep that in mind. About George—”
“I’ll admit I’m a bit jealous.” He took a deep breath. “Envious, too.”
“You need a life of your own, Lance. Get a girl, have a child.”
“Um, actually, odd you should say that.”
“Oh, Lance! Who is she? Do I know her? Oh darling, I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s not what you think; she’s a client. I was hired by her mother to . . . well contribute to their family.”
“What?”
“Well, to put it bluntly, to seduce her to ensure their family line continues.”
“Oh no . . . please, Lance, don’t do that! ” Caroline’s voice resounded with her horror. “Tell her to go to a sperm bank; don’t they hand out pseudo-husbands there?”
“No, I don’t think they do.” But what a coincidence you mention that place.
“Lance, you don’t know what you’re getting into! You’ll be so hurt.”
“Don’t worry. I’m not doing it! Well, I told her I’d do it, but I’m not.”
“You don’t need money that badly, Lance. No money in the world is enough. How could you even consider such a thing? Stop all this and live. When was the last time you fell in love?”
Hello? Is she listening to me? I said I wasn’t going to do it. “Caro, please. My job doesn’t exactly facilitate my lifestyle.”
“Rubbish! You earn a living teaching women to masturbate so they can go home and make fantastic love to someone else. You are just sidestepping your entire life.”
“I have a perfectly happy, organised, well-balanced and tranquil life, and an excellent career doing a job I love. I don’t need a string of broken marriages to prove I’ve lived. And you’re not exactly qualified to lecture me on propriety, are you?”
“Touché, Pussycat.”
Lance sighed. “I just miss you, Caroline. Though I do have to admit, I’m enjoying this assignment. I’m enjoying her . She’s sweet and totally unimpressed by me. Her world is fascinating, absorbing, really.”
“Well, I think you need to take a good look at your real motivation in taking on this whole thing, Doc. Shrink yourself!”
“I need the money, Caro. I’m sticking it out—for at least a few months.” A stubborn edge entered Lance’s voice.
“Don’t cry to me when the shit hits the proverbial fan, baby boy.” Her voice softened. “I just worry about you. You’re a lonely man and you don’t even know it.”
“Caro, I’m fine, just fine. Take care, please, Granny.”
“I will, darling, see you soon. I love you!”
Lance cut off the call with a frown. Well, that didn’t go according to plan, either. Deserting Lance was the name of this movie. First George absconding into the land of love, and now Caroline, of all people, ripping into him about the morality of the assignment. He stifled an uneasy twinge that told him she was right and he’d made a mistake.
Well, it was only for a little while longer. Caro’s question echoed in his mind: “When was the last time you fell in love?”
“With you, Caro,” he said sadly. “With you.”
He couldn’t remember the last time he’d even made love to someone. Two or three years at least, and a joyless mechanical affair that had been. He had no time and no patience for getting-to-know-you games or speed dating. No
“Yes, yes. We are both fine. Actually, George is better than fine, as I’m sure you know.”
“Yes! He called me last night. I’m flying over for the wedding. How are you taking this?”
Lance hesitated. “I’m surprised . . .”
“Darling, you were always more dependent on him than he on you, appearances notwithstanding.”
“George had a mother,” Lance replied acidly.
“Oh, darling, that was so long ago . . . get over it.”
“Caro, baby, it’s you I can’t get over!”
Silvery laughter greeted his exclamation.
“Lance, I’m now a grandmother, thirty pounds heavier and twenty years older than the woman you loved. Keep that in mind. About George—”
“I’ll admit I’m a bit jealous.” He took a deep breath. “Envious, too.”
“You need a life of your own, Lance. Get a girl, have a child.”
“Um, actually, odd you should say that.”
“Oh, Lance! Who is she? Do I know her? Oh darling, I’m so happy for you.”
“It’s not what you think; she’s a client. I was hired by her mother to . . . well contribute to their family.”
“What?”
“Well, to put it bluntly, to seduce her to ensure their family line continues.”
“Oh no . . . please, Lance, don’t do that! ” Caroline’s voice resounded with her horror. “Tell her to go to a sperm bank; don’t they hand out pseudo-husbands there?”
“No, I don’t think they do.” But what a coincidence you mention that place.
“Lance, you don’t know what you’re getting into! You’ll be so hurt.”
“Don’t worry. I’m not doing it! Well, I told her I’d do it, but I’m not.”
“You don’t need money that badly, Lance. No money in the world is enough. How could you even consider such a thing? Stop all this and live. When was the last time you fell in love?”
Hello? Is she listening to me? I said I wasn’t going to do it. “Caro, please. My job doesn’t exactly facilitate my lifestyle.”
“Rubbish! You earn a living teaching women to masturbate so they can go home and make fantastic love to someone else. You are just sidestepping your entire life.”
“I have a perfectly happy, organised, well-balanced and tranquil life, and an excellent career doing a job I love. I don’t need a string of broken marriages to prove I’ve lived. And you’re not exactly qualified to lecture me on propriety, are you?”
“Touché, Pussycat.”
Lance sighed. “I just miss you, Caroline. Though I do have to admit, I’m enjoying this assignment. I’m enjoying her . She’s sweet and totally unimpressed by me. Her world is fascinating, absorbing, really.”
“Well, I think you need to take a good look at your real motivation in taking on this whole thing, Doc. Shrink yourself!”
“I need the money, Caro. I’m sticking it out—for at least a few months.” A stubborn edge entered Lance’s voice.
“Don’t cry to me when the shit hits the proverbial fan, baby boy.” Her voice softened. “I just worry about you. You’re a lonely man and you don’t even know it.”
“Caro, I’m fine, just fine. Take care, please, Granny.”
“I will, darling, see you soon. I love you!”
Lance cut off the call with a frown. Well, that didn’t go according to plan, either. Deserting Lance was the name of this movie. First George absconding into the land of love, and now Caroline, of all people, ripping into him about the morality of the assignment. He stifled an uneasy twinge that told him she was right and he’d made a mistake.
Well, it was only for a little while longer. Caro’s question echoed in his mind: “When was the last time you fell in love?”
“With you, Caro,” he said sadly. “With you.”
He couldn’t remember the last time he’d even made love to someone. Two or three years at least, and a joyless mechanical affair that had been. He had no time and no patience for getting-to-know-you games or speed dating. No
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