She’s been real quiet all day.”
I nod and head up. She’s got all that upstairs floor to herself but it doesn’t take any time to find her. Wearing a tank top and little shorts, she’s curled up on the window seat, all long legs and golden skin with the sun streaming in over her. But her face is bleached-sheet white, and she’s holding herself like she hurts.
“Jenny? You all right?”
With a shuddering breath she sits up and points to a thick envelope lying on the bed. “Not really. You should look at those.”
“What is it?” Frowning, I pinch the clasp open, expecting some legal papers, or maybe something to do with her dad’s funeral or all the other plans that come accompanied by a kick to the face when a parent is dying. Instead there’s a bunch of pictures. “Where are these from?”
“The Eighty-Eight’s compound.”
“What?” That doesn’t make any sense. Zoomie and Blowback aren’t heading out until tonight.
She’s watching me, her expression like an eggshell. Carefully smooth but looking real easy to crack. “I thought of it a while back. After I started hearing about Reichmann threatening me, and just after I heard that my dad was sick but before he went to you. Because I was afraid I’d have to leave, right? There wouldn’t be anyone to protect me anymore. So I was trying to think of anything I could do that would get them off my back.”
Jesus Christ. She’s got the fucking meth kitchen circled in red. But I doubt she was planning to go in and burn it down. “What were you thinking?”
“That I’d send these in to the state police.”
My chest seems to hollow, like a razor went in and scraped everything out. Send these in. To the cops.
To get the Eighty-Eight off her back.
She keeps going. “I didn’t follow through before because I thought it wouldn’t do anything anyway. I mean, someone has to know these guys are operating out there, and no one has done anything yet. But Landauer’s asking for info from me. These guys aren’t even in Landauer’s jurisdiction because they’re a county over, but I think he’ll push it. I think he’ll make sure Reichmann goes down.”
And she’s not wrong. Landauer would. But the razor keeps scraping more out of me, and my chest is hurting like any second I’m going to spit up blood. I can’t look at her. I can’t look at anything in this fucking room. I should have earned my place here before stepping a foot in.
My throat is raw. “Did you think I couldn’t handle it? You think I couldn’t take him down?”
“I know you can.”
That’s not what these pictures say. And the anger’s coming, so fucking hot. “You know we’re planning to go out there.”
She slips her arms around her belly like she’s holding herself. Her eyes are huge and filling up. “Yes.”
“But you do this. Fuck. ” I toss the pictures back to the bed. “Now you’re crying? You aren’t the one who just got stabbed in the fucking chest— and in the fucking back. You’re the one who screwed me here last night, who told me you fucking needed me, all the while knowing you were taking away the one fucking reason I’m here.”
Her eyes close, tears slipping out under her lashes. “It didn’t seem to matter. I knew I’d lose you one way or another.”
“Lose me?” My laugh rips at my guts and I go to her. I catch her chin and make her look up at me, and the misery in her eyes makes us a goddamn perfect pair. “ Lose me? No, Jenny. You go ahead and stab me in the back and turn me into a worthless piece of shit. I still won’t let you go. I don’t care if you don’t fucking need me anymore.”
Because I still need her. So damn much. I need her taste and take it now, her mouth salty with tears. She’s pushing at me but I’m not done. I go in deeper, until she’s clinging to me, kissing me back with her hot velvet tongue.
My fist in her hair, I pull up and snarl, “And least you still need that.”
She shoves at my chest. This
I nod and head up. She’s got all that upstairs floor to herself but it doesn’t take any time to find her. Wearing a tank top and little shorts, she’s curled up on the window seat, all long legs and golden skin with the sun streaming in over her. But her face is bleached-sheet white, and she’s holding herself like she hurts.
“Jenny? You all right?”
With a shuddering breath she sits up and points to a thick envelope lying on the bed. “Not really. You should look at those.”
“What is it?” Frowning, I pinch the clasp open, expecting some legal papers, or maybe something to do with her dad’s funeral or all the other plans that come accompanied by a kick to the face when a parent is dying. Instead there’s a bunch of pictures. “Where are these from?”
“The Eighty-Eight’s compound.”
“What?” That doesn’t make any sense. Zoomie and Blowback aren’t heading out until tonight.
She’s watching me, her expression like an eggshell. Carefully smooth but looking real easy to crack. “I thought of it a while back. After I started hearing about Reichmann threatening me, and just after I heard that my dad was sick but before he went to you. Because I was afraid I’d have to leave, right? There wouldn’t be anyone to protect me anymore. So I was trying to think of anything I could do that would get them off my back.”
Jesus Christ. She’s got the fucking meth kitchen circled in red. But I doubt she was planning to go in and burn it down. “What were you thinking?”
“That I’d send these in to the state police.”
My chest seems to hollow, like a razor went in and scraped everything out. Send these in. To the cops.
To get the Eighty-Eight off her back.
She keeps going. “I didn’t follow through before because I thought it wouldn’t do anything anyway. I mean, someone has to know these guys are operating out there, and no one has done anything yet. But Landauer’s asking for info from me. These guys aren’t even in Landauer’s jurisdiction because they’re a county over, but I think he’ll push it. I think he’ll make sure Reichmann goes down.”
And she’s not wrong. Landauer would. But the razor keeps scraping more out of me, and my chest is hurting like any second I’m going to spit up blood. I can’t look at her. I can’t look at anything in this fucking room. I should have earned my place here before stepping a foot in.
My throat is raw. “Did you think I couldn’t handle it? You think I couldn’t take him down?”
“I know you can.”
That’s not what these pictures say. And the anger’s coming, so fucking hot. “You know we’re planning to go out there.”
She slips her arms around her belly like she’s holding herself. Her eyes are huge and filling up. “Yes.”
“But you do this. Fuck. ” I toss the pictures back to the bed. “Now you’re crying? You aren’t the one who just got stabbed in the fucking chest— and in the fucking back. You’re the one who screwed me here last night, who told me you fucking needed me, all the while knowing you were taking away the one fucking reason I’m here.”
Her eyes close, tears slipping out under her lashes. “It didn’t seem to matter. I knew I’d lose you one way or another.”
“Lose me?” My laugh rips at my guts and I go to her. I catch her chin and make her look up at me, and the misery in her eyes makes us a goddamn perfect pair. “ Lose me? No, Jenny. You go ahead and stab me in the back and turn me into a worthless piece of shit. I still won’t let you go. I don’t care if you don’t fucking need me anymore.”
Because I still need her. So damn much. I need her taste and take it now, her mouth salty with tears. She’s pushing at me but I’m not done. I go in deeper, until she’s clinging to me, kissing me back with her hot velvet tongue.
My fist in her hair, I pull up and snarl, “And least you still need that.”
She shoves at my chest. This
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