designers. You will want for nothing.’
I opened my mouth then closed it again.
‘So, would you like me to pay for the alterations?’ the Dragon said, his face full of hope.
‘I tell you what,’ I said, ‘I will take your offer into consideration when I am hearing the case tomorrow.’
He bowed his head again. ‘That is all I can ask for: some small amount of consideration for the care I am taking of you.’
‘Yes, I’ll be absolutely damn sure to remember that you tried to bribe me to give you a sympathetic outcome,’ I said with force. ‘I’ve half a mind to find in the tree’s favour without even having a hearing. In fact, I should double whatever price he’s asking for his leaves.’ I moved my head and the first metre or so of my body closer to the Dragon’s face. ‘You insult me by attempting to corrupt me. Is this the way you do business in the East?’
The Dragon replaced his teacup. ‘This is the way I do business everywhere, because it’s the way business is done.’ He disappeared.
‘Asshole!’ I said, and slithered down off the throne and headed back to my sleeping quarters.
‘You should do what you said you’d do: find in the tree’s favour tomorrow,’ the stone said.
‘No, I’m going to hear this case fairly and impartially,’ I said. ‘The fact he’s tried to bribe me doesn’t change the facts of the case, and I will hear it based on the facts rather than on how much I intensely dislike the two parties involved in it.’
‘Which one do you hate more?’ the stone said.
I slid into my sleeping pit. ‘If I had a choice of which one I’d hang upside down over a scorpion pit, I’d choose both of them.’
‘Would you like me to order you a scorpion pit? I can get one about three metres across, filled with the most enormous, highly venomous scorpions you ever saw. Hours of fun for the whole family.’
‘You’re worse than they are,’ I said, and stretched out to sleep on the cushions.
CHAPTER 5
T he next morning I entered the court for the final day of hearings. The guards fell to one knee and saluted me, then rose and held their swords in front of them. I nodded to Lily and Martin, slithered up the dais and onto the chair behind the desk. A demon servant took up position next to me, ready to turn the pages of the documents, saving me the embarrassment of having to turn them with my mouth.
‘First case today,’ I said, ‘the horse one; about time we had something interesting. Bring the case of Ling versus Toi.’
Ling and Toi entered the room and kneeled before me; they were both dragons in human form.
‘Up you get,’ I said, and they rose, their expressions suspicious at my informal tone. ‘I’d like to hear from your own mouth, Mr Toi, exactly what the hell you were thinking when you did this.’
Toi, a slender, elderly gentleman in a black silk robe, was the owner of the demon stallion. He bowed his head slightly to speak. ‘This was an accident, Lady Regent. The stallion concerned broke from its restraints in the middle of the night and went toHonoured Miss Ling’s residence under its own volition, probably drawn by the scent of her fine mare in heat.’
‘You had the stallion restrained?’ I said.
‘It was in a high-walled stall, but it managed to escape,’ Toi said. ‘I do not understand how such a thing could have happened, ma’am. I provide the best accommodation for my beasts. This will never happen again.’
I turned to the woman, who also wore a black silk robe, probably dressed down to show her distress. ‘Miss Ling, you claim that the mare is ruined and request compensation of ten jin of Celestial Jade. Has the mare been injured by bearing the foal and cannot bear any more for you?’
‘She has been contaminated by the demon essence of the stallion,’ Ling said, her jaw clenched with anger. ‘This foal is half-demon and an abomination. I will never be able to sell another foal from the mare, as any future foal will be tainted
I opened my mouth then closed it again.
‘So, would you like me to pay for the alterations?’ the Dragon said, his face full of hope.
‘I tell you what,’ I said, ‘I will take your offer into consideration when I am hearing the case tomorrow.’
He bowed his head again. ‘That is all I can ask for: some small amount of consideration for the care I am taking of you.’
‘Yes, I’ll be absolutely damn sure to remember that you tried to bribe me to give you a sympathetic outcome,’ I said with force. ‘I’ve half a mind to find in the tree’s favour without even having a hearing. In fact, I should double whatever price he’s asking for his leaves.’ I moved my head and the first metre or so of my body closer to the Dragon’s face. ‘You insult me by attempting to corrupt me. Is this the way you do business in the East?’
The Dragon replaced his teacup. ‘This is the way I do business everywhere, because it’s the way business is done.’ He disappeared.
‘Asshole!’ I said, and slithered down off the throne and headed back to my sleeping quarters.
‘You should do what you said you’d do: find in the tree’s favour tomorrow,’ the stone said.
‘No, I’m going to hear this case fairly and impartially,’ I said. ‘The fact he’s tried to bribe me doesn’t change the facts of the case, and I will hear it based on the facts rather than on how much I intensely dislike the two parties involved in it.’
‘Which one do you hate more?’ the stone said.
I slid into my sleeping pit. ‘If I had a choice of which one I’d hang upside down over a scorpion pit, I’d choose both of them.’
‘Would you like me to order you a scorpion pit? I can get one about three metres across, filled with the most enormous, highly venomous scorpions you ever saw. Hours of fun for the whole family.’
‘You’re worse than they are,’ I said, and stretched out to sleep on the cushions.
CHAPTER 5
T he next morning I entered the court for the final day of hearings. The guards fell to one knee and saluted me, then rose and held their swords in front of them. I nodded to Lily and Martin, slithered up the dais and onto the chair behind the desk. A demon servant took up position next to me, ready to turn the pages of the documents, saving me the embarrassment of having to turn them with my mouth.
‘First case today,’ I said, ‘the horse one; about time we had something interesting. Bring the case of Ling versus Toi.’
Ling and Toi entered the room and kneeled before me; they were both dragons in human form.
‘Up you get,’ I said, and they rose, their expressions suspicious at my informal tone. ‘I’d like to hear from your own mouth, Mr Toi, exactly what the hell you were thinking when you did this.’
Toi, a slender, elderly gentleman in a black silk robe, was the owner of the demon stallion. He bowed his head slightly to speak. ‘This was an accident, Lady Regent. The stallion concerned broke from its restraints in the middle of the night and went toHonoured Miss Ling’s residence under its own volition, probably drawn by the scent of her fine mare in heat.’
‘You had the stallion restrained?’ I said.
‘It was in a high-walled stall, but it managed to escape,’ Toi said. ‘I do not understand how such a thing could have happened, ma’am. I provide the best accommodation for my beasts. This will never happen again.’
I turned to the woman, who also wore a black silk robe, probably dressed down to show her distress. ‘Miss Ling, you claim that the mare is ruined and request compensation of ten jin of Celestial Jade. Has the mare been injured by bearing the foal and cannot bear any more for you?’
‘She has been contaminated by the demon essence of the stallion,’ Ling said, her jaw clenched with anger. ‘This foal is half-demon and an abomination. I will never be able to sell another foal from the mare, as any future foal will be tainted
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