Home Field by Hannah Gersen Page A

been displaced by this ghost of a girl.
    â€œSweetheart, I’m sorry, I’ve had a rough day. I lost one of my best players, a linebacker, and we don’t have a good replacement. I have to rethink everything.”
    â€œThat sounds pretty stressful,” she said drily.
    â€œI’m sure it doesn’t seem like a big deal to you, but if you knew about football—”
    â€œI know about football. I just don’t find it especially interesting.”
    Dean turned away to gather up his notes, as well as Garrett’s. He was tired; his eyelids burned. He couldn’t understand why his kids were giving him so much grief. He wasn’t the one who’d left them.
    â€œWhere is it written that I have to like football?” Stephanie said.
    He faced her again. “Look, I don’t expect you to care about the holes in my playbook, I really don’t. But I do expect you to give a shit about your younger brothers, who really need you right now.”
    â€œI’m so sick of this. I go out, I let loose for one night, and you make me feel guilty. I’ve been babysitting them all summer long.” Stephanie swiped at her eyes, smearing her already smudged makeup. “Aunt Joelle says I’m the one holding this family together.”
    â€œDon’t bring Joelle into this.”
    â€œWhy shouldn’t I? You’re just going to dump Robbie and Bry on her when I leave.”
    â€œI’m working on getting a sitter,” Dean said, straining to keep his voice even. “I was going to ask around at church tomorrow. I was hoping you’d come with me.”
    â€œI’m supposed to help with Aunt Joelle’s barbecue.”
    â€œSo am I. We can go after.”
    â€œI thought you didn’t want to go.”
    â€œThat doesn’t mean I’m not going.”
    He matched her stubborn gaze. She didn’t like church; he didn’t like Joelle. He had her in a bind. She couldn’t say no without making him look like a better person.
    â€œFine, I’ll go.”
    She turned the lights off as she left the kitchen—out of habit or spite, Dean couldn’t tell. The darkness was a relief. Cool air came through the window above the sink, a hint of autumn. It was something Dean noticed every August, that unexpected hint of crispness, like a pocket of cold water in a sun-warmed lake. Dean had met Nicole in August, just a few weeks after he’d moved to Willowboro. He’d gone to the country club to inquire about membership, and she had been at the front desk. The club was in the midst of a renovation; it was being changed from a small, family-run golf course to an “outdoor recreation facility” with a pool, tennis courts, driving range, and, for the winter months, a small gym with racquetball courts and a sauna. With her fresh, makeup-free face and her optimistic smile (a willed optimism, Dean realized now), Nicole seemed a part of that transformation. She seemed like the future of this new place that he had moved to. Later he told people that he knew he wanted to marry her at first sight, because that was what people said about their brides, but the truth was, his wish on that night was just to be near her again. It was unbelievable to him that she was single; later he learned that everyone still thought of her as Sam’s girl. People warned him to be careful, that she was on the rebound. She came to every game; she knew about football. Dean didn’t care how she’d learned it. All that mattered was that she seemed happy when she was with him. She had been so sad when they met; she had been sad and he had made her happy. Dean couldn’t understand why he was never able to do it again.

Chapter 2
    T he sun felt like an assault when Dean woke up the next morning. He had slept through his alarm. Downstairs, he found Stephanie making breakfast for the boys, without a trace of the night’s excesses on her pale face. Youth. His