it’s God behind everything, don’t you?”
I shrugged. “Not necessarily…”
“You poor deluded do-gooder,” she said sadly, shaking her head. “I should have known when you got all misty over a dead maid.”
“Who’s still up there, by the way. In Rachael’s room. And it’s the Great Whom ever, not Who ever.”
Rose snorted, eyes dancing. “Some religious fanatic you are—choosing an accusative whom over a nominative who. ”
“It sounded cool at the time,” I said. “Anyway, if it’s not God or a spirit or something, what do you call the guy in charge?”
“It,” she said. “I call the it in charge it . Or sometimes them .” She leaned closer and rested her arms on the table. “Think about it. Coming back like this, to planet Earth, from a strange floaty place? Isn’t it obvious?”
I scratched my chin in thought. “The Book of Enoch?”
Rose gaped at me. “What the … no, you silly goose. Where do you come up with this stuff? It’s aliens , Dan.”
“Aliens?” I said, wiggling my fingers like tentacles.
“What else? All our hopping from skin to skin. All those stories of people being abducted into space. The aliens are studying us to see if we’re ready for intergalactic primetime. We’re the first ones. It’s a great honor.”
All this time, after more than twenty years, I’d harbored a quasi-religious view of my comings and goings. Though I didn’t think the Great Whomever was the biblical God, he could have been an ancient God, or a benevolent Loki-like spirit. Something on the Outside, beyond our understanding, but definitely spiritual. Not necessarily from the Book of Enoch … but even that was a better guess than aliens.
It just burst out of me—I howled with laughter. People from the other tables stared at me, but I didn’t care.
Space aliens!
“What?” Rose said. “It’s true, you know.”
I couldn’t stop laughing. Like a tiny crack in an overstressed dam, the pressure of the last ten hours came gushing out. My stomach hurt from too much food—and what a sight that would be, me cackling like a lunatic and throwing up everywhere. What would the space aliens think?
When I finally calmed down enough to care about other people again, I noticed Rose wasn’t laughing.
“Hey,” I said, “I’m sorry. But Aliens? Really?”
Rose stared at her hands, her face blank of expression. “You don't have to believe it. Doesn’t make it not true.”
A cool two minutes passed like that. Of course she was upset. She had a belief system, and I’d dismissed it in the most callous of ways.
I considered what she’d said. Alien abduction was a more specific set of beliefs than mine, yet less rigorous than the minister’s. Maybe she was right. Like Rose had said: all those rides, from body to body…
“Hopping?” I said, smiling gently, remembering the word she’d used. “So you like hopping into strange women, huh?”
Rose smiled, but didn’t look up.
When the waiter came, I picked up the hefty tab and paid with cash.
“Ricky actually had a good idea,” I said after he’d left. “He said he’d brought two large suitcases—one for me and one for you. If we can find them, they’d be just the thing to sneak out two corpses.”
Rose shrugged.
“Can I borrow your room key?”
“I suppose.”
She reached in her purse and gave it to me.
“Give me a minute,” I said. “I’ll be right back.”
After returning to Rachael’s room, I fished Ricky’s keys from one of his pockets. Grisly work, because his body was stiff and had started to smell a little. As an afterthought, I grabbed Andre’s gun off the table and tucked it under my shirt. Then I rejoined Rose in the lobby.
It didn’t take long to find Ricky’s sports car. We looked in the trunk and found it empty.
“Dammit,” I said. “They must be where he’s staying … was staying. Even dead, the guy’s a menace.”
“Well, he must have bought them somewhere,” Rose
I shrugged. “Not necessarily…”
“You poor deluded do-gooder,” she said sadly, shaking her head. “I should have known when you got all misty over a dead maid.”
“Who’s still up there, by the way. In Rachael’s room. And it’s the Great Whom ever, not Who ever.”
Rose snorted, eyes dancing. “Some religious fanatic you are—choosing an accusative whom over a nominative who. ”
“It sounded cool at the time,” I said. “Anyway, if it’s not God or a spirit or something, what do you call the guy in charge?”
“It,” she said. “I call the it in charge it . Or sometimes them .” She leaned closer and rested her arms on the table. “Think about it. Coming back like this, to planet Earth, from a strange floaty place? Isn’t it obvious?”
I scratched my chin in thought. “The Book of Enoch?”
Rose gaped at me. “What the … no, you silly goose. Where do you come up with this stuff? It’s aliens , Dan.”
“Aliens?” I said, wiggling my fingers like tentacles.
“What else? All our hopping from skin to skin. All those stories of people being abducted into space. The aliens are studying us to see if we’re ready for intergalactic primetime. We’re the first ones. It’s a great honor.”
All this time, after more than twenty years, I’d harbored a quasi-religious view of my comings and goings. Though I didn’t think the Great Whomever was the biblical God, he could have been an ancient God, or a benevolent Loki-like spirit. Something on the Outside, beyond our understanding, but definitely spiritual. Not necessarily from the Book of Enoch … but even that was a better guess than aliens.
It just burst out of me—I howled with laughter. People from the other tables stared at me, but I didn’t care.
Space aliens!
“What?” Rose said. “It’s true, you know.”
I couldn’t stop laughing. Like a tiny crack in an overstressed dam, the pressure of the last ten hours came gushing out. My stomach hurt from too much food—and what a sight that would be, me cackling like a lunatic and throwing up everywhere. What would the space aliens think?
When I finally calmed down enough to care about other people again, I noticed Rose wasn’t laughing.
“Hey,” I said, “I’m sorry. But Aliens? Really?”
Rose stared at her hands, her face blank of expression. “You don't have to believe it. Doesn’t make it not true.”
A cool two minutes passed like that. Of course she was upset. She had a belief system, and I’d dismissed it in the most callous of ways.
I considered what she’d said. Alien abduction was a more specific set of beliefs than mine, yet less rigorous than the minister’s. Maybe she was right. Like Rose had said: all those rides, from body to body…
“Hopping?” I said, smiling gently, remembering the word she’d used. “So you like hopping into strange women, huh?”
Rose smiled, but didn’t look up.
When the waiter came, I picked up the hefty tab and paid with cash.
“Ricky actually had a good idea,” I said after he’d left. “He said he’d brought two large suitcases—one for me and one for you. If we can find them, they’d be just the thing to sneak out two corpses.”
Rose shrugged.
“Can I borrow your room key?”
“I suppose.”
She reached in her purse and gave it to me.
“Give me a minute,” I said. “I’ll be right back.”
After returning to Rachael’s room, I fished Ricky’s keys from one of his pockets. Grisly work, because his body was stiff and had started to smell a little. As an afterthought, I grabbed Andre’s gun off the table and tucked it under my shirt. Then I rejoined Rose in the lobby.
It didn’t take long to find Ricky’s sports car. We looked in the trunk and found it empty.
“Dammit,” I said. “They must be where he’s staying … was staying. Even dead, the guy’s a menace.”
“Well, he must have bought them somewhere,” Rose
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