far had we gone. Her parents had given her a purity ring for her fifteenth birthday, a simple gold ring with a single cross carved into it, a ring she wore with pride. Not that they were religious. I think her parents were just terrified of her getting pregnant after she'd grown tits the size of Katy Perry's, seemingly overnight.
It was probably something I should be worrying about, I thought, swallowing against the lump in my throat. We hadn't used anything either time. I closed my eyes. I couldn't think about that now.
What could I tell her? Certainly not the truth. But she'd seen the way he'd kissed me, the way he'd held me to him, and she'd probably heard the words he'd started to say as he called across the grass.
“Not very.”
“ How far?”
“ Second.” I said quickly, the heat rising in my face.
She frowned and I wondered if she knew I wasn't telling the truth. “Be careful, Meg. With him.”
“I will,” I said.
Ms. Malcolm walked through the door and our conversation ended.
And I had a feeling our friendship was ending, too.
TWELVE
Aidan and I were on the phone when Jada called later that night. I ignored the first three times my cell signaled an incoming call.
It flashed again and I sighed. “Can I call you right back? Jada's trying to get a hold of me.”
He chuckled. “Mama Bear checking in, huh? Sure, call me back.”
I clicked over.
“ Where were you today?” she asked, not sounding curious at all. She was angry. Furious.
“ Wh-what?” I stammered.
I wondered if she'd somehow found a way to follow me to Aidan's house after school, to creep into the backyard and peer through his bedroom window and watch exactly how we'd spent our afternoon.
“Track tryouts. Today. You disappeared after English. I thought you were going to the locker room.”
My hand flew to my mouth. How had I forgotten? “Oh, Jada. I'm sorry. I totally forgot.”
“How?” she demanded. “We've been talking about it for two months. How could you possibly forget?”
“ I don't know,” I mumbled. I stood up and began to pace my room. “I have a lot on my mind.”
“ I know that, Meg. That's why we decided to do this in the first place. Remember?”
I remembered.
She asked again. “Where were you? What was so important that you forgot about this? About me?”
For the first time ever, I wished for my cell phone to drop a call. But our connection was good, not even a hint of static breaking the silence that answered her. I hovered by my desk, shoving random papers in my drawer and stowing pens and pencils in a plastic Sea World cup as I tried to think of a suitable response. I had nothing.
“You were with him, weren't you?” I could hear her chewing her gum but she wasn't popping bubbles today. “I hope you know what you're doing.”
“ I do.”
More silence.
“I should go,” I said. “I have homework.”
“ We'll talk tomorrow,” she warned before the line went dead.
I called Aidan back.
“Did you want to try out?” His voice was gravelly, like he'd just finished a smoke.
I fell back on my bed, propping my pillows against the wall, making a softer headboard than the solid oak one already behind me. “Not really. I mean, it was Jada's idea.”
“So you were OK with it? Missing today and missing out on the season?”
I thought about the afternoon I'd had instead. My insides turned to mush just thinking about it. “Definitely. I just feel bad letting her down.”
“You need to do what you want to do.” He paused and I heard him exhale. “Not what other people want.”
“ I know. But I still feel guilty.”
“ You think your dad feels guilty?” Aidan asked. “For running off and leaving you and your mom, for kicking you out of your house?”
My gaze settled on the bulletin board mounted above my desk. There was a bare patch of cork in the bottom corner, a spot that had housed a photo of me and my dad from two Christmases ago, a picture of us leaning towards each other,
It was probably something I should be worrying about, I thought, swallowing against the lump in my throat. We hadn't used anything either time. I closed my eyes. I couldn't think about that now.
What could I tell her? Certainly not the truth. But she'd seen the way he'd kissed me, the way he'd held me to him, and she'd probably heard the words he'd started to say as he called across the grass.
“Not very.”
“ How far?”
“ Second.” I said quickly, the heat rising in my face.
She frowned and I wondered if she knew I wasn't telling the truth. “Be careful, Meg. With him.”
“I will,” I said.
Ms. Malcolm walked through the door and our conversation ended.
And I had a feeling our friendship was ending, too.
TWELVE
Aidan and I were on the phone when Jada called later that night. I ignored the first three times my cell signaled an incoming call.
It flashed again and I sighed. “Can I call you right back? Jada's trying to get a hold of me.”
He chuckled. “Mama Bear checking in, huh? Sure, call me back.”
I clicked over.
“ Where were you today?” she asked, not sounding curious at all. She was angry. Furious.
“ Wh-what?” I stammered.
I wondered if she'd somehow found a way to follow me to Aidan's house after school, to creep into the backyard and peer through his bedroom window and watch exactly how we'd spent our afternoon.
“Track tryouts. Today. You disappeared after English. I thought you were going to the locker room.”
My hand flew to my mouth. How had I forgotten? “Oh, Jada. I'm sorry. I totally forgot.”
“How?” she demanded. “We've been talking about it for two months. How could you possibly forget?”
“ I don't know,” I mumbled. I stood up and began to pace my room. “I have a lot on my mind.”
“ I know that, Meg. That's why we decided to do this in the first place. Remember?”
I remembered.
She asked again. “Where were you? What was so important that you forgot about this? About me?”
For the first time ever, I wished for my cell phone to drop a call. But our connection was good, not even a hint of static breaking the silence that answered her. I hovered by my desk, shoving random papers in my drawer and stowing pens and pencils in a plastic Sea World cup as I tried to think of a suitable response. I had nothing.
“You were with him, weren't you?” I could hear her chewing her gum but she wasn't popping bubbles today. “I hope you know what you're doing.”
“ I do.”
More silence.
“I should go,” I said. “I have homework.”
“ We'll talk tomorrow,” she warned before the line went dead.
I called Aidan back.
“Did you want to try out?” His voice was gravelly, like he'd just finished a smoke.
I fell back on my bed, propping my pillows against the wall, making a softer headboard than the solid oak one already behind me. “Not really. I mean, it was Jada's idea.”
“So you were OK with it? Missing today and missing out on the season?”
I thought about the afternoon I'd had instead. My insides turned to mush just thinking about it. “Definitely. I just feel bad letting her down.”
“You need to do what you want to do.” He paused and I heard him exhale. “Not what other people want.”
“ I know. But I still feel guilty.”
“ You think your dad feels guilty?” Aidan asked. “For running off and leaving you and your mom, for kicking you out of your house?”
My gaze settled on the bulletin board mounted above my desk. There was a bare patch of cork in the bottom corner, a spot that had housed a photo of me and my dad from two Christmases ago, a picture of us leaning towards each other,
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