In Name Only by Ellen Gable

nightgown.”
    “Certainly.”
    While Caroline
was putting on her slip, Selly spoke.  “I cannot tell you how grateful I am to
you, Miss Caroline, for assisting me.”
    “I am happy to
help, Selly. Besides, you didn’t place yourself in that condition alone, did
you?”
    Selly replied
quietly, “No.”
    Caroline came
from around the screen, now dressed in her shift. “I am now prepared for that
wretched piece of clothing,” Caroline said as she motioned for the corset.
    Caroline held the
garment in place as Selly began to tie the back and pull on the strings.
    “It’s just,” the
servant whispered.
    “What, Selly?”
    “I’m frightened. 
I’ve never. . .given birth before.  I remember watching my mother when my
sister was born.”
    “How old were
you?”
    “About nine years
old.” Selly pulled hard on one of the strings and Caroline gasped. 
    “I apologize,
Miss.  Is this too tight?”
    “Yes, Selly,
although I suppose that it is necessary.  So you have a sister?”
    She slowly shook
her head.  “She died a few weeks after birth.  My mother passed away shortly
after that.  It was just my father and me until. . .”
    “Until what,
Selly?”
    “Until he
passed.  I was 12.”
    “How awful.”
    “Then I came here
and met Mr. David.”
    Caroline cringed.
    “I thought he was
the most wonderful, charming, humorous man I had ever had the pleasure to
know.  And now I’m. . .” She remained silent for a moment.  “My mother screamed
when she was giving birth.  Do you suppose I shall do the same?”
    “I don’t know,
Selly.  But I promise you this, I shall be there for you when you have the
baby.”
    “You’ve already
done so much for me.”
    “I want to be
there.”
    “That would be so
kind of you.  Again, I am so grateful,” Selly said, as she tied the last string
on Caroline’s corset.
    *  *  *
    Liam O’Donovan
entered St. Mary’s Episcopal Church and couldn’t seem to stop his hands from
trembling.  He had just observed the Martins emerge from their carriage and
Miss Caroline Martin was not wearing black. He had been waiting for almost a
month now.
    He walked down
the center aisle and passed the Martin family pew to his own seat across from
them.  He suddenly felt nervous and awkward.
    He knelt to say a
few prayers, but again found himself distracted. Miss Martin was just behind
him and to the right. Stop it, Liam.  This is an inappropriate place to be
infatuated with a girl.
    He smiled
inwardly when he remembered asking the servant Ben which room Miss Martin would
be occupying.  He had hoped that she would be watching for him.  Despite her
mourning, seeing her at the bedroom window was a sign that she was interested. 
Liam had to be absolutely sure that she would say yes before he asked her uncle
for permission to court her.  The shame and the uncertainty of being refused
would be too much for him to bear.
    *  *  *
    Caroline sat
upright in the church pew, trying hard to breathe with the stiff corset
plastered to her body.  Since it had been over six months since her father had
died, she was now able to wear lighter colored dresses.  Today, she wore a gray
dress with a light gray blue fitted bodice and matching gloves.
    A few moments
ago, Liam O’Donovan walked by and entered a pew on the left side of the
congregation. Her heart began to pound at the thought of speaking to him after
service.
    The organist
began to play, the loud chords jolting Caroline into attentiveness. Elizabeth lifted up the hymnal. 
     
    Rock of Ages,
cleft for me ,
    Let me hide
myself in Thee,
    Let the water
and the blood,
    From Thy
wounded side which flowed
    Be of sin the
double cure
    Save from
wrath and make me pure
     
    As they sang,
Liam’s voice was on key and pleasant sounding, and Caroline was happy that he
was singing so loudly.
     
    When I draw
this fleeing breath,
    When my
eye-strings break in death
    When I soar to
worlds unknown
    See thee on
Thy judgment throne
    Rock of ages,
cleft