Jaded 2: Broken Love Series by Renee Tyler Page A

mentally battling between excitement and annoyance. This is the last place we needed to carry on the way we were. I really came for the word today. I didn’t want any sexual tension and mixed emotions getting in the way of me receiving and accepting the message.
    It had been almost two months since I’d laid eyes on Troy—well, in the flesh at least. I’d stalked his private Facebook and Instagram page. I found out that he’d been in Los Angeles and Miami. I’d been telling myself that I didn’t care, that I was slowly getting over him just as I’d gotten over Shane. However, in all my so-called getting over, I’d picked up on my drinking. I did well at first, mostly continuing my ritual of having a glass of wine in the tub when I got home as a way to unwind. However, lately my wine has been replaced with vodka. I didn’t think it was that bad until Marcus and Charity brought it to my attention, especially when we went out a couple of weeks ago and they had to carry me in the house. Also, it wasn’t the first time in the last few weeks. This is why church was so important to me today. I feel myself slipping and though I’ve made some steps to take my life in a better direction financially and personally, I’ve somehow lost myself emotionally because of a man. I’ve begun with the Raiel starter pack—drink and when the drinking doesn’t numb you anymore, take up with as many men as possible, hoping they’ll help you forget the one you really want. 
    I cringed every time the pastor said turn to your neighbor. I kept turning towards Charity, who was turning to Marcus. I wanted to smack her silly because she was doing it on purpose. I never turned towards Troy and said anything. I could see him out the corner of my eye turning toward me every time, but I never gave him the satisfaction. Besides, Sister too much perfume that sat behind him didn’t have a problem being his neighbor.
    As soon as church was over, I quickly ran towards the exit while Troy, Charity, and Marcus were held up in conversation. Charity, Marcus, and I had plans to go to brunch afterward, but I couldn’t wait around for them. I don’t know how I even made it through the service. I eventually shut off my emotions and completely focused on the word, and boy did Pastor Turner touch on exactly what I needed to hear. He talked about looking in the rearview mirror. He said that when God delivers you from something, you shouldn’t keep focusing on what he removed from your life. That definitely resonated with me.
    I could feel his presence as I made my way to my car. I hit my key fob, hoping to make it to my car before he approached.
    “L’oriel!” he called out. I didn’t turn around or even pause. I kept a steady pace right towards my car. “L’oriel! Dang on it, don’t make me curse on holy ground. Will you wait up? Please,” he pleaded behind me. I was almost to my car, and I thought I was home free when his long arms caged me, in preventing me from opening my car door. My heart rate increased. “Why are you running from me, L’oriel?” I was panting and he was cool as a cucumber. I could feel the heat emanating off his body. I fought my body’s natural inclination to lean into him.
    “I haven’t heard from you in almost two months, Troy. What could you possibly want to talk to me about now?” He couldn’t do this; he couldn’t put me on ice, then think he’s just going to come around and I’m going to fall at his feet. Even if my body still responded to him, he couldn’t just put me on the shelf and decide to take me off at his leisure. Oh no, I had more pride than that.
    “I want to tell you that I missed you. I didn’t call because at the time, I didn’t know what to say.” I rolled my eyes.
    “But you’ve figured out what you want to say now…after all this time.” My back was still to him. I could see his reflection in the car window. I saw him struggling to keep his hands above my head. He looked as if he