her
face but she was absolutely about to start defending Nick. And she knew Skye
just wanted what was best for her. She wrapped her fingers and thumb around her
forehead to massage her own temples. “He’s the only one I want. He’s the only
one that calls to me.”
Haleigh rolled over a bit, staring up at her. Jenna lowered
her hand, running Haleigh’s hair through her fingers to have something to do
with her hands and something to focus on. “He’s in the dreams too. Not so much
in them-in them, but in my head in the dreams, while Ian’s fucking me. It’s
totally messed up. But I really do believe it’s Nick or nothing. And nothing right now is going to kill me if I can’t get some good sleep in the next few
nights. I’m running on fumes as it is.”
Cyn took her hand and squeezed it. “Then you do what you
need to and we’ll be here when you need to fall apart if you don’t want to do
it in front of Nick. We’ll be your rocks, just like you were for each of us.
Got it?”
Tears filled her eyes but she closed them before they
tumbled over.
She was so lucky to have them in her life. Women that
understood her and her needs. Didn’t ridicule or look down their nose at her
for her desires. There weren’t a lot of people in the world that could say that
and truly mean it, and she felt blessed.
Her mind was so scattered by everything but one thing kept
popping up in her mind with giant question marks plastered over it. She blurted
it out before she could stop herself. “Will it ever stop?”
“What? The dreams?” Cyn asked.
“No. The hurt. It’s been four years. And two months and
twenty-three days. Will it ever go away?”
Sympathy crossed Cyn’s face but Haleigh’s the one who spoke
up. “It’s probably like losing someone but you didn’t get to say goodbye. I
think it’s harder that way. Keeps the pain fresh because you have no end to the
pain. No way to forgive yourself or stop playing the ‘what if’ game.”
For all of Haleigh’s innocence, when she made comments like
that she reminded all of them she’d lived with a lot. Battled in the fight of
her life and won but at a heavy price.
Jenna made a mental note to hug Kyle and Scott again, just
for simply loving such a sweet and wonderful soul as Haleigh’s. All three of
them were special to her.
Cyn pulled her out of her own inner to-do list. “What did
you mean by self-suspend? Or something like that. Skye started to say it
earlier but you cut her off.”
Jenna wiped her eyes, glad to be focused on something else
for a bit. “I not only bottom to riggers who can tie me in rope, I can tie
myself.”
Silence met her explanation until Haleigh broke it. “Huh?”
Jenna chuckled and Skye snorted. “It took me a while to get
my head around it but once you see her do it? It will blow your mind.”
“But isn’t the point of being tied up to have sex?”
“Sometimes.”
“Huh again?” Haleigh added. “ Qu’est que c’est ,
sometimes? My brain does not compute with that.”
“Rope is very different than most forms of bondage. Two
people that aren’t sexually attracted to each other can have amazing rope
energy. And some other people that are very attracted to each other can crash
and burn when it comes to rope. It’s very intense, whether you’re doing floor
work or suspension or dynamic suspensions—where you transition through
different ties, one leading into the next and to the next.”
“But how do you do it yourself?” Cyn questioned. “I don’t
even see how that’s possible. Tying yourself up on the floor maybe, but in the
air? Wouldn’t that be really hard? I can barely do ten chin-ups before I need a
break and a smoothie.”
Jenna flexed her arm, proud as hell when her biceps made an
impressive appearance. “Ever wondered why I’m so strong?”
Haleigh felt her arm, squeezing as she flexed. “Remind me to
hire you as my bodyguard if I ever need it.”
Skye curled her hand into a fist at the mention
face but she was absolutely about to start defending Nick. And she knew Skye
just wanted what was best for her. She wrapped her fingers and thumb around her
forehead to massage her own temples. “He’s the only one I want. He’s the only
one that calls to me.”
Haleigh rolled over a bit, staring up at her. Jenna lowered
her hand, running Haleigh’s hair through her fingers to have something to do
with her hands and something to focus on. “He’s in the dreams too. Not so much
in them-in them, but in my head in the dreams, while Ian’s fucking me. It’s
totally messed up. But I really do believe it’s Nick or nothing. And nothing right now is going to kill me if I can’t get some good sleep in the next few
nights. I’m running on fumes as it is.”
Cyn took her hand and squeezed it. “Then you do what you
need to and we’ll be here when you need to fall apart if you don’t want to do
it in front of Nick. We’ll be your rocks, just like you were for each of us.
Got it?”
Tears filled her eyes but she closed them before they
tumbled over.
She was so lucky to have them in her life. Women that
understood her and her needs. Didn’t ridicule or look down their nose at her
for her desires. There weren’t a lot of people in the world that could say that
and truly mean it, and she felt blessed.
Her mind was so scattered by everything but one thing kept
popping up in her mind with giant question marks plastered over it. She blurted
it out before she could stop herself. “Will it ever stop?”
“What? The dreams?” Cyn asked.
“No. The hurt. It’s been four years. And two months and
twenty-three days. Will it ever go away?”
Sympathy crossed Cyn’s face but Haleigh’s the one who spoke
up. “It’s probably like losing someone but you didn’t get to say goodbye. I
think it’s harder that way. Keeps the pain fresh because you have no end to the
pain. No way to forgive yourself or stop playing the ‘what if’ game.”
For all of Haleigh’s innocence, when she made comments like
that she reminded all of them she’d lived with a lot. Battled in the fight of
her life and won but at a heavy price.
Jenna made a mental note to hug Kyle and Scott again, just
for simply loving such a sweet and wonderful soul as Haleigh’s. All three of
them were special to her.
Cyn pulled her out of her own inner to-do list. “What did
you mean by self-suspend? Or something like that. Skye started to say it
earlier but you cut her off.”
Jenna wiped her eyes, glad to be focused on something else
for a bit. “I not only bottom to riggers who can tie me in rope, I can tie
myself.”
Silence met her explanation until Haleigh broke it. “Huh?”
Jenna chuckled and Skye snorted. “It took me a while to get
my head around it but once you see her do it? It will blow your mind.”
“But isn’t the point of being tied up to have sex?”
“Sometimes.”
“Huh again?” Haleigh added. “ Qu’est que c’est ,
sometimes? My brain does not compute with that.”
“Rope is very different than most forms of bondage. Two
people that aren’t sexually attracted to each other can have amazing rope
energy. And some other people that are very attracted to each other can crash
and burn when it comes to rope. It’s very intense, whether you’re doing floor
work or suspension or dynamic suspensions—where you transition through
different ties, one leading into the next and to the next.”
“But how do you do it yourself?” Cyn questioned. “I don’t
even see how that’s possible. Tying yourself up on the floor maybe, but in the
air? Wouldn’t that be really hard? I can barely do ten chin-ups before I need a
break and a smoothie.”
Jenna flexed her arm, proud as hell when her biceps made an
impressive appearance. “Ever wondered why I’m so strong?”
Haleigh felt her arm, squeezing as she flexed. “Remind me to
hire you as my bodyguard if I ever need it.”
Skye curled her hand into a fist at the mention
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